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Should I stay or go?

6 replies

fairynick · 08/08/2020 14:20

DP and I, for the most part, have a really happy and healthy relationship. We’re both still young and in our twenties but have been seeing each other for about four and a half years.
When we first started seeing each other we were both still teenagers so argued over more silly things, but being together from then I’ve loved how we’ve basically watched each other grow up alongside the other and we now don’t really argue or generally have any ongoing issues etc.
Because of personal circumstances we’ve both had to live separately for the past year or so. Me back at home with my mum and him alone.
Came to see him this weekend, a tram and two trains so about three hours travelling, which I don’t mind because he does the same for me.
He mentioned earlier in the week that he’d like to go out riding his bike with his friends on Saturday morning but would be back by noon, I of course didn’t have any problem with this because it fitted quite well with our day- I like a lie in on a Saturday and he’s an early riser, and we had plans to go for a picnic at lunchtime.
When I woke up at about half nine I didn’t have a text or anything but didn’t expect to because they tend to bike rurally where signal is hit and miss and as well he’s with his friends so wouldn’t think he’d be glued to his phone.
A few weeks ago a friend of his was airlifted to hospital but is thankfully okay, it was from biking at the place they went today. When it got to half eleven/midday I did start to get a bit worried.
Finally heard from him at about quarter to two to let me know he’d be back by 3pm.
I’ve let him know that I’ve basically been waiting around all day, had nothing to eat as I’d been anticipating the lunchtime picnic, one of the hottest days of the year so as I’ve been looking through everyone else’s Instagram stories of couples going out to parks and the beach I’ve been stuck inside alone.
I’m so angry, I don’t see why I should work all week to spend my Saturday sat inside all day in glorious weather waiting for him to show him.
I’m unsure whether I should just get up and leave and go home, think this would show him that I’m serious and it’s unacceptable, however I don’t want to make this much bigger than it already is PLUS three hours on a sweaty train with a mask.
The other option is to wait for him to come back, have the argument, and somehow make up and go on the picnic? I don’t know if it’ll be the same now.
Just feels really frustrating and like my weekend has been wasted.
Oh, and to top it off, he’s had a new shower installed and I can’t figure out how to turn it on.

OP posts:
Oldraver · 08/08/2020 14:26

Well if he's been out bike riding till 3 then I reckon he wont wnat to be going out.

I wouldn'r be happy at travelling all that way, then him not being back when he said he would

Only you can decide if it bothers you that much to go home

But no very rude of him

fairynick · 08/08/2020 14:33

It’s hard because half of me thinks that storming off home will only escalate things, and we also don’t get much time together. However, the other half thinks that if I stay then I’m minimising his behaviour and if we end up going out today it will be a bit false.

OP posts:
Purplewithred · 08/08/2020 14:35

wait till he gets back and see how apologetic he is. take it from there. You can always stomp off home if he thinks you're being unreasonable.

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ChewingTurnips · 08/08/2020 14:38

Go home Op and stop doubting yourself, you are the prize!

CuriousaboutSamphire · 08/08/2020 14:39

Go home.

At the very least he forgot you....or just decided you could wait cos his mates are more fun.

Is that what you want.from a life partner?

Go home and let him work out what he did wrong for himself. You have no responsibility for teaching him to be a considerate adult.

chatterbugmegastar · 08/08/2020 14:52

He's made a mistake and you've travelled a long way to come second

However if this is a one off and has never happened before, id talk to him about it and make sure you have a lovely 'rest of' your weekend

Should it happen again after your conversation , I'd end the relationship

If this has been a regular occurrence why are you still with him ?

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