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Original poster

Experience of having three kids

47 replies

Wingingthis · 07/08/2020 17:59

Currently have 2 lovely DDs. Youngest is 3 months oldest is 2.5 so definitely not having another any time soon. BUT interested to hear peoples opinions on having 3 children? I’m finding 2 a struggle atm but I know it’s early days/a bit of a weird world at the moment!

OP posts:

DramaAlpaca · 08/08/2020 21:09

Mine are grown up now but I had 3 under 4 for a short while. It was exhausting but totally worth it. DS3 completed our family perfectly.

CountFosco · 08/08/2020 21:18

Ours are 12, 11 and 8. Close together was good for getting the baby years (my least favourite bit) out of the way quickly. We had no help (family far away) but both have good jobs so threw money at the situation and both work PT. Now we're at a great stage and it's lovely. Lots of fun. I was one of 4, DH one of 3, no way would we have chosen to have 1 or 2.

BackforGood · 08/08/2020 22:14

I have 3 (all grown up now) and I have no regrets.
3 is a great number.
The most difficult, overwhelming, and lifechanging change for me, was the change from no dc to having 1
After that, it was FAR easier to go from 1 to 2, and number 3 fitted right in.
I do think the child's personality has a lot to do with it. My eldest was the most challenging of my 3. Someone else might have had an esy baby for their first and found the 2nd one more difficult.

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IndecentFeminist · 08/08/2020 22:23

We has two close together, and then a bonus baby 5.5 yrs later.

He is an absolute joy. A total monster mind you. So we now have a 10, 8 and nearly 3 yr old. He's utterly adored and spoiled rotten by his big siblings. It's been lovely watching them fall head over heels for him.

He was an accident, and tbh we wouldn't have wanted a third. In many ways it makes life harder, we were out of the baby/toddler years but are now straight back in there. At times, entertaining different ages can be challenging. But the game gap has its benefits, the big kids are old enough to understand that sometimes they need to wait, that he may be a pain in the arse sometimes.

Would we do it again? Probably not. We could be more spontaneous, have more freedom with just older children. But he has brought us so much love, it's hard to know.

IndecentFeminist · 08/08/2020 22:25

Going from 1 to 2 was definitely the hardest. #3 was the easiest to adjust to tbh.b

ndo4000 · 08/08/2020 22:29

I have 3 - 13, 10 and 2.5. I love it! It's hard work and I was just on the cusp of getting some independence back when dd3 arrived. But I love the big age gap. The big 2 are awesome with her and a huge help. I salute all of those who have 3 little ones. Not sure I could have done it!!!!

choccybuttonshelpeverything · 08/08/2020 22:38

My three are 4.5, 1.5, newborn, it's hard but starting to lessen as baby gets easier. I'm breastfeeding the two smallest ones (bloody hard work) the eldest is a great help. It won't b this hard forever

fannyanney · 08/08/2020 22:43

Very very hard. It's exhausting, you get no time to yourself in the early years and there doesn't seem to be enough time to give everyone the attention that they need.

It gets easier (I can only speak up to youngest being 4) and they are a fantastic trio. But it is no picnic. I would say, don't have 3 unless you really want 3.

Elmo311 · 08/08/2020 22:49

I have 2 under 3 and it's tough! I can't imagine another right now! But I think if I was to have another I wouldn't want too much of a gap, so it puts me off having any more!

Dogssox · 08/08/2020 22:51

My 3rd has been my easiest so far. He's only 12weeks old. The bigger 1s are 7 and 12

Walkon · 09/08/2020 00:31

I love having 3. I went from 1 to 3. It was definitely tough, Me and DH had no help and my 1st wasn't quite 2 when the twins were born. Having them close together was hard at the start , endless cycle of nappies and sleepless nights but I love that they are close in age now.

TheVanguardSix · 09/08/2020 00:39

Wouldn't be without my 3! But definitely be prepared to feel the stretch. You will be hurled into feeling 'complete' as a family.

FourForYouGlenCoco · 09/08/2020 00:56

It’s mental and absolutely exhausting. I breezed from 1-2; 2-3 nearly drove me to a breakdown. 4 year gap and then 20 month gap didn’t help. They’re now 8, 4 and 2 and while it’s easier than the early days, it’s still very stressful. More stressful than enjoyable most of the time tbh.
But - when I had 2, even though I knew how lucky I was and was thrilled with my lot, I never felt ‘done’. Sometimes it was so strong I felt like I could almost see the space where another one should be. As soon as 3 came along, that feeling went - she really did complete the family. I think if we hadn’t had her I’d forever have felt like someone was missing. And we do have brilliant fun - I have hope that an easier life is on the horizon and not too far away now! I also have no family help and DH works silly hours so I’m on my own with them from when they get up til bedtime, 6 days a week. If I had an extra pair of hands around a bit more often, it would be a totally different story and I’d enjoy it a lot more - most of the stress is just from constantly trying to keep track of them and making sure they’re all safe & behaving when we’re out and about. I wouldn’t be without any of them, but I’m also never, ever having any more

vintageyoda · 10/08/2020 14:39

I had 3 (in under 4 years) 15,13 &11. I love having 3 ( 2 have extra needs - asd & physical disability) and I love having them so close together in age too. It's not for the faint hearted but having a little crew of kids is great fun. I wouldn't swap it for the world but then I've always found motherhood quite doable, many people seem to struggle a bit more so it's horses for courses.

Wishiwasrunning2 · 10/08/2020 18:24

11, 8 and 6, love it now and they are such good company.

Baby days were hard when I had nursery and school runs all day and I was exhausted, but it's the best thing I ever did!!

DH would say they nearly broke us but I just remember the good bits!!

choccybuttonshelpeverything · 29/12/2020 22:02

3 under 4.5 with youngest born few days before lockdown. Bloody hard! Easing now 9 months later.

choccybuttonshelpeverything · 29/12/2020 22:07

Haha I've commented twice months apart. That says it all really 🤣

TheIrishRover · 29/12/2020 22:17

I had 3 within 4 years. I wouldn't change it for the world but thank God i had no idea how bone crunchingly hard it would be. Youngest is now 6 and I'm starting to see the woods for the trees only recently, and even now it's only rare glimpses...

I'd do it again in a heartbeat.

CoRhona · 30/12/2020 05:18

Mine are now 18, 16 and 12. I like having three but as pp says, many things are geared to families of four!

nachthexe · 30/12/2020 05:32

My third was brain damaged at birth. Three under four would have been hard enough but the youngest having a disability turned our lives completely upside down. We had no family support and frankly the other two (who were 17mos and 3.5 when she was born) were absolutely affected despite our best efforts. We all made it through but I do regret the impact on my other children, who were just babies themselves. It’s just part of their lives now, but...

Choccorocco · 30/12/2020 05:57

Seriously, think about what and who you are asking. Why not ask people with 2 kids if they are happy? Anyone with 3 kids already has a vested interest in 3 being brilliant because to say otherwise would mean that you wish one of your kids wasn’t alive!

Anyway, how manageable it is it really all depends on the kids’ personalities and the strength of your adult relationships and support networks. Having a third could be fine and wonderful or it could be a complete shitshow that tests you to the extreme and breaks your relationship. I’ve seen both.

GalOopNorth · 30/12/2020 05:59

We had twins first. DC3 was born when they were 4 and was so easy, just fitted in.

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