Please help me with a toddler!

[OhToBeASeahorse]

This will be long.

I've a lot on right now - 30 weeks pregnant, building works to kitchen and dining room, DH is great but has only had a week off this far this year.

I feel like I suddenly dont know how to be a good mum to my almost 2 year old. I would value any advice on 3 massive issues!

Sleep
He is an early riser (pre 6 am). Currently has dinner at 5, milk at 6.15, bath at 6.30 then in bed for 7. Sometimes doesnt fall asleep for an hour. Isnt really interested in milk but tonight suddenly cried for it when I put him to bed. I dont want to start giving him milk over night, we night weaned at 8 months! Tonight he seemed exhausted, screamed for 'naptime' and climbed out the bath immediately so i put him to bed about 6.45 but it still took about 35 mins for him to go to sleep.

Nappies
Still poos about 4 times a day. Has a bit of eczema. I thought he might be dairy intolerant when he was little but we tried cutting it out and it made no difference. The eczema is recent. He hates having his nappy changed. I'm exhausted from constantly wiping up poo.

Tantrums
I feel like I just follow him around. Is that normal?! If he suddenly decides he wants to go for a walk the meltdown is massive if we have to get ready. He had a 20 min screaming fit for bubbles the other day (we didnt have any) - I went down the shops with him and got some, he snatched the bottle off me and poured the whole lot away. Argh!!!

I just feel a bit lost like I suddenly have no instincts and I'm worried about how I'm going to balance a toddler and a newborn. Any advice is SERIOUSLY welcome.

Toddlers are hard even without the 30 week pregnant bit.

Can you potty train?
And can you get a Gro clock? I found it life changing.

Toddlers are an unreasonable bunch, and I found age 2 pretty hellish. Mine has just turned 3 and seems to be less tantrummy and SLIGHTLY more reasonable.
Hang in there

Could you organise a bit more exercise, walk around the block or whatever?

This must be hard for you, sounds like a lot is going on.

Ok so, for the sleep, have you heard of the Huckleberry app? You put in the details of your child (Dob/usual Nap ) it calculates exactly when they are due nap/bedtime, including a sweet spot of when they will fall asleep quickly. It's been a lifesaver for me. If it's taking a long time for them to fall asleep, then maybe they are not tired enough or overtired?

Regarding the poops, it would seem to me that there is still something upsetting the digestion, maybe gluten? When you cut out dairy did you cut out soya as well, as they can be linked?
Similar proteins apparently I think, and can cause similar symptoms.

And the tantrums, maybe give them a count down, so roughly when they usually say they are wanting a walk etc, before this you could say "in 5 minutes we are going to do xxx, come and get ready" almost preempt the tantrum?

I would say it seems normal for them to be a bit out of sorts with all you have going on though, so I wouldn't worry. All the best when the wee one arrives🤗

Regarding the poo. Give him more fatty foods. Our DD did loads of runny poos and read about toddler diarrrhea, we upped fatty foods and sorted itself fairly quickly and has been on 1 solid poo a day since

Sorry no help for sleep etc, but re poops - toddler diarrhoea.

DS is 3, never had a solid bowel movement and it can be 2-6 times a day. It’s relentless, but doctor did say it should clear up on its own. Make sure you’re giving plenty to drink though!

@Qwertyguerty must have cross posted, what sort of fatty food did you give? I’m at a loss, I was told to cut out sugar but it didn’t help at all!

Thanks everyone. To top it all off he is now waking at night which I could really do without!!

@BigBirdsbird I'd love to potty train, but he is so frequent and unpredictable I dont know if its feasible.

@OhioOhioOhio we go out at least once a day and he has free access to the garden. It's just getting him ready to go out is a battle!

@giftponderings I used that app when he was tiny. I'll try it again, thanks. Maybe it is gluten.

I'd reply more but he is crying again. I'm so tired and I feel so deflated.

BoggledBudgie

Sorry I didn't see your post! Mostly we upped intake of cheese, full fat milk alongside healthily fats like peanut butter (or other nut butters) and avocado

@Qwertyguerty

BoggledBudgie

Sorry I didn't see your post! Mostly we upped intake of cheese, full fat milk alongside healthily fats like peanut butter (or other nut butters) and avocado

I have just logged on to say the same. Returned to full fat milk after dropping it on HV advice. Butter, cheese etc. Did the trick for DS1.

If you have building works at home would a playpen help you both for short periods of time? Get you out of the following round bit for a while and give you the space to schedule a walk, with getting ready time factored in?

If you are managing a building project as well no wonder you are at your wit's end.

OP, playpen sounds a great idea. I loved mine. You have a lot on, you are doing great from what i have just read. It will get easier. Hang on in there.

( have a plenty of bubbles in reserve..)

Usually he has a playroom which is baby gated off but it's part of the works so is a no go zone. That's what I need - something to contain him.

Trying to be brave but honestly want to just cry!!