I hate my life and health problems - I feel I will never heal

[NooNooHead]

Hi Mumsnetters...,

I know that my situation is incredibly unique so I am not going to ask for advice; merely just to let out all my sadness and frustration that I have about my current health problems.😭

I had my beautiful 2 month old daughter via c-section and was given IV antibiotics which I believe gave me a yeast infection that is now systemic and has become a big problem.

I also have a drug induced neurological involuntary movement disorder called tardive dyskinesia (TD) after being given an antipsychotic drug following a breakdown from a head injury and post concussion syndrome 5 years ago. The movements affect my tongue, mouth and face, and are embarrassing and uncomfortable.

The yeast infection seems to have triggered an autoimmune response and some kind of leaky gut syndrome. Whenever I have tried to get rid of the yeast, it triggers a massive yeast die-off reaction whereby the dyskinesia movements get a lot worse and I end up twitching even more. I seem to be getting new symptoms from the infection every day too; itchy skin and scalp, burning dry eyes, thrush, palpititations, and I have an awful increase in my TD symptoms whenever I try to put a little bit of antifungal medication on or eat foods that attack the yeast. I am not feeling well physically and mentally at all.🥺😭

I have been eating my low carb diet, trying my best to cut back on the Candida loving foods but in vain. 😭

Every time I eat something, I seem to react to it with a Herx type yeast die-off reaction. I believe that the yeast infection is causing a hormone imbalance which isn't helping my movement disorder, but ridding the yeast infection seems to be making the movement disorder worse too. So, I am in a vicious circle.😥😭

My involuntary movements (I have awful constant tongue movements that were never that bad before this) are getting me down on just their own, stealing the joy from my life. Combine these with the candida symptoms and I am feeling in a quite dark place.😩

I have seen a neurologist and he had no idea what to advise or suggest.

I don't know what the point of this post is, I guess that I am finding it all incredibly tough to deal with. I feel that I am missing out on the first wonderful few weeks of my newborn, and wanted to vent a bit where I know there will be many kind, non-judgemental people.

From the extra you have added I would even more strongly urge you to stop self diagnosing and get proper medical treatment. Take care xx

All the more reason for you to present yourself at hospital then OP and demand that they get to the bottom of your symptoms. It's simply not good enough to say 'We don't know what's wrong with you'. You need to get demanding and not take that as an answer. If they can't figure out what's going on they need to run more tests, observe you when you have these extreme reactions and figure what is going on.

Honestly think you need to see a really good nutritionist. One that has a lot of experience with chronic health issues.
You will need to pay but i will be worth it.
It is very hard to self prescribre

@WorkingItOutAsIGo

I know all of that.

I don’t believe you have a yeast infection.

You have an 8 week old baby. Please see your GP and tell them all you have written here.

Jeez.

Have you never had thrush? Lucky you. How can you 'not believe' the OP has a yeast infection?

Is there a FB group for your neurological disorder? I've found them good for passing on details of knowledgeable and sympathetic consultants, you may be better to ask for a referral to a different hospital. Unexplained symptoms are horrible to deal with, especially when they go across disciplines and the consultants only deal with a bit, you can feel like no one's looking at the whole picture

Thank you all. I do believe that my neurologist did a blood test and I think it came back normal - apparently my results for anti basal ganglia antibodies were normal. I think that I need to ask what this means more in depth though.

I saw the neurologist privately and he seemed quite useless to be honest. When I asked about the autoimmune conditions that could be triggered by pregnancy he said that it was possible as some women do get things like this.

It is perplexing how when I eat certain foods, it seems to trigger my dyskinesia more - when I drank some almond milk thr other day, I was grimacing and sticking my tongue out more (these are both usual symptoms of my movement disorder but it was unusual that I should react to eating something)

I have also noticed that my tinnitus gets worse when I eat too. It is all so annoying and odd. I think my GP probably sees me as a female hypochondriac...

OP do you know what make TD worse? Stress. Lack of sleep. Anxiety. All of which you will be experiencing with a new baby and a dose of thrush.

Health anxiety is terrifying and can be compounded by just having had a baby. I understand no one wants to think they have PND when it could be explained in other ways but it’s easy to treat and might just be the medication you’re looking for. Imagine all this disappeared in a couple of weeks...

I had meds related TD ‘many years ago and I know how awful it feels and I know how much worse it gets when anxious or stressed. Your convincing yourself of stuff that either doesn’t exist (leaky gut) or is incredibly rare - that isn’t healthy.

Please speak to your health visitor about seeing a perinatal mental health profession - if they feel your symptoms are due to an autoimmune problem they can run the relevant tests and refer you to the relevant professionals - they did with me and I’ve never had to see a psychiatrist or take psychiatric medication in almost 20 years now. I haven’t had TD in that time either.

Please consider it. There’s no shame in speaking to mental health professionals and they may help you get answers regarding physical health that your GP won’t address.

Thank you for your reply. I am not sure that it isn't a dose of post natal depression and I am sure that you are right about my TD becoming worse with the stress of a c-section, anaesthetic medication, a new baby etc. I am also sure that the thrush won't be helping either. I know that my health anxiety is pretty high right now, but it seems too coincidental that my dyskinesia is worse after eating etc when these issues never existed before, nor did they start until now.

I am pretty fed up with the medical profession not believing me as I have been gaslighted by 4 neurologists in the past when I was trying to convince them I had TD 5 years ago. It was only upon seeing a 5th one did he actually listen and diagnosed me instantly.

I am not a hypochondriac - possibly a bit anxious yes, but not neurotic - and I know my body well enough to be convinced something is certainly not right.

I am not sure that going on antidepressant drugs will relieve these symptoms of thrush, and I know that it could easily make my TD even more severe, and I think it would be completely unbearable if that happens.

Just wanted to send some sympathy your way OP it sounds really tough!

The body is incredibly complicated and sadly sometimes the medical profession just doesn't have all the answers yet.. No advice but sending a virtual hug xx

Thank you for your kind words. I have so many symptoms that were definitely not here before the yeast infection so I am pretty certain that they are related, but obviously until I get a proper test and confirm this, I won't know for definite.

AbsentmindedWoman yes of course I have had thrush (many many times), and breastfeeding thrush and have been diagnosed with a Candida albicans infection in my gut. Which is precisely why I engaged on this thread to say to the OP, who is clearly suffering badly, that I didn’t believe her symptoms were caused by a yeast infection and she should seek medical help rather than trying to self diagnose and restrict her diet and medical treatment in the belief this would cure her.

Her subsequent posts make this advice even more correct.

I agree you need proper medical help. I suffered thrush and probiotics helped me, particularly one that contained lactobacillis rhamnosus. Perhaps you could discuss with your doctor if this might be an option for you? You d need to check first in case of any interactions with any current medications you are on. I wish you health and healing ⚘🙏

Please don't listen to anyone who tells you how you're supposed to feel. You were right about threw TD, I have absolutely no doubt you're right about the thrush. IDO think, though, that your reaction to canesten cream was more likely a reaction to something in the cream, rather than the candida dying off.

It is entirely possible that you have PND, and of course youtu have f'ing health anxiety - not in the passive aggressive way of saying you're a hypochondriac, but that you have horrendous health issues, and they're making you anxious.

You need someone very sensible. Where are you in the UK, if you can find an integrative GP, like Dr Rangan Chatterjee, or Dr. Sarah Davies, they will at the very least not dismiss you, and understand that it's perfectly possible to suffer from more then one thing at a time

Good luck, I know it's shit, but there will be someone out there who can help, just don't go to your nearest herbalist. With a tiny baby, and TD, you do need the combination of a fully qualified medical doctor with an open mind and holistic approach.

@iborgia thank you so much for such a kind and sensible reply. Your reply is definitely one of the best and most empathetic ones on here, I really appreciate it.

I think your suggestions are excellent and certainly worth pursuing about the integrative GP..

I was very frustrated at a so-called friend yesterday telling me that I was frustrating,(!) And that I didn't think to research enough science behind what I was saying about things like a ketogenic diet being the best approach etc She totally believed that if I was strict enough and followed the keto diet properly, I could eradicate the yeast infection entirely in spite of the fact that I am not sure about how my body reacts to things like coffee now. And although I told her this, she was insistent that coffee was a great anti-inflammatory and that I should stop dismissing things like that without doing proper research.

Hopefully with the right medical professional behind me, I can get to the bottom of this all. Yes, I could have PND but there is every likelihood too that the health problems are the sources of my anxiety. I sincerely hope my TD, the yeast infection, tinnitus and anxiety can all settle down soon.

I am in Norwich so I will investigate holistic type doctors who are more sympathetic than the average GP.

I would focus on your thoughts and your mental health as a priority. Your physical health may well improve as a result.