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Help - need advice quickly, not sure what to do .

84 replies

SirVixofVixHall · 31/07/2020 23:22

I have an elderly aunt, 73, who lives alone. In good health but very bad knees that limit her mobility a lot. She is very old fashioned, but she does use an ipad and facebook messenger, although she doesn’t often message me and her messages are usually quite brief. We chat on the telephone every few weeks.
I was out walking the dog but came home and there is a message from her, sent at 9.20pm, just saying this.
Stock k
again
That is all it says, i saw it about half an hour ago, assumed she has mis typed, and replied asking if all was ok and telling her I would call in the morning. But it suddenly occurred to me, what if she means “stuck” ? That she could have fallen. I live a long way from her, two and a half hour drive. If I call her she won’t answer as she is probably in bed, so it will really frighten her. The telephone is downstairs. She has a mobile that she rarely uses and I don’t know the number. I think that she has a button alarm thing, but I am not certain. She has a man locally who helps her with her shopping etc, and she would probably try to get him in an emergency.
What to do ?

OP posts:
fascinated · 31/07/2020 23:26

Was it an iPad message?

fascinated · 31/07/2020 23:26

Message back obviously and try to text.

fascinated · 31/07/2020 23:27

Difficult one. I can see why you’re concerned

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SirVixofVixHall · 31/07/2020 23:29

It was through facebook messenger, she doesn’t have a facebook profile but uses the messenger sometimes from what I can gather.
I can’t text her as I don’t have her mobile number. I have asked her to message me back if possible, so far no response.

OP posts:
Lottiebugz22 · 31/07/2020 23:30

Hmm I'd be ringing if it was me and in future get that guys number just in case xx

AWaspOnAWindowReturns · 31/07/2020 23:30

I think I'd phone - not great to frighten her but better than her being stuck overnight while you worry whether you're doing the right thing. If she doesn't answer, perhaps a Facebook post in her local group to ask if any neighbours could pop round and check on her? I hope she's ok.

SirVixofVixHall · 31/07/2020 23:36

She won’t answer, she quite often fails to reach the phone, even in the daytime. It takes her ages to get downstairs and then once up she doesn’t come down again until the morning. She will either be in bed, or stuck. If she did try and come down to get the phone she might be stranded downstairs all night as she is in so much pain.

OP posts:
SirVixofVixHall · 31/07/2020 23:40

Dh has found her mobile number and the man’s number, so we are texting both of them. He remembered that he had asked for them a few months ago after she had a bad fall.

OP posts:
SpillTheTeaa · 31/07/2020 23:41

Oh no. Glad you found the number. If they don't answer it's definitely worth trying to do a welfare check. Even if it was nothing you'd feel better in knowing

MyNameHasBeenTaken · 31/07/2020 23:41

If she did mean stuck, then she probably cant get to her phone!
My first thought when I read what she had typed was stuck.
Message her back on whatever she messaged you on.
She might find it easier to reply, than to make a new chat.
Ask dead end questions
Are you hurt
(Wait)
Yes/no
Can you move
(Wait) yes/no
Until you can work out how to help

kulaexchange · 31/07/2020 23:42

Do you have a key for her house?

SirVixofVixHall · 31/07/2020 23:47

I don’t have a key, and she hasn’t replied at all. I can’t tell if she has seen the messages, is there a way of knowing ? (As in the ticks on Whatsapp)
There is a grey circle with a white tick in next to my message .

OP posts:
Delbelleber · 31/07/2020 23:47

You say she is in good health apart from knees, how bad are her knees? 73 is not what I would consider elderly unless they were frail from bad health.

SirVixofVixHall · 31/07/2020 23:49

Have sent a text to her ( probably pointless but just in case) and a text to the man who helps, he is a taxi driver so I am hoping he may be working rather than asleep, although he has young children so maybe not.

OP posts:
Delbelleber · 31/07/2020 23:49

Sorry I should have read more before replying. Hope its not another fall.

orangejuicer · 31/07/2020 23:50

Are you able to go see her?

SirVixofVixHall · 31/07/2020 23:51

Her knees are terrible. She needs both replaced but nothing has been done for ages. They have been much worse recently and she has been struggling more, she has been given a zimmer frame ( she did have a stick), She doesn’t have any other health issues, but very limited mobility.

OP posts:
giantangryrooster · 31/07/2020 23:52

If she has an alarm button thing, you could contact the place answering the alarms. The one alarm button I know (I'm foreign) you can communicate through, if it is that kind they can make contact?

SirVixofVixHall · 31/07/2020 23:54

DH could drive over but it would be three in the morning by the time he got there. Am wondering whether to call the local police ?

OP posts:
Yaottie · 31/07/2020 23:54

If you don't hear back you could call her local police force to see if they will do a welfare check on her

orangejuicer · 31/07/2020 23:55

I think I would just go personally.

SirVixofVixHall · 31/07/2020 23:55

I agree 73 not ancient, I have very fit friends that age, I suppose she seems older because her mobility is so affected.

OP posts:
flossiegrippiter · 31/07/2020 23:56

I would call her local police station

BitOfFun · 31/07/2020 23:56

Could you ask the police to do a welfare check?

Yaottie · 31/07/2020 23:57

I'd call the local police and if nothing happen s there I'd maybe send DH