Daughter wants to be a model

[namechangedbutneedadvice]

DD11 found a website and filled in an enquiry form last night all by herself. Was a bit shocked... They've emailed me and want to see her. We have an 'assessment' next week. Entirely her idea and I feel sick about it. Her dad and I are both quite against the idea and have told her this but that we want to support her.

Obviously I think she's beautiful and is a wonderful person but not sure if she's model style good looks. I'm worried about the effect rejection might have on her self-esteem at her age... or if she is accepted. Has anyone any experience? They said they'll give her a decision on the day which could be f*ing awful. This isn't a stealth boast... I'm so far from being a pushy mother and I'm trying to support her but if I'm honest, I've been very negative about it to her and already made her well up this morning not my finest hour as a parent. Would really appreciate some advice even if it's just to chill the f*k out.

Make sure you google the company (and it’s directors) to check it’s not a front for selling photographs

If it is, you will have to find a tactful way of forbidding your DD to attend

Check the company is actually a proper modelling agency. Surely you know if your kid is proper model material. All three of mine are gorgeous but I doubt they're proper model material. Also it's not just looks, is she patient? Resilient?

How old is she? What kind of modelling is she looking to do? Which agency are interested in her?

I was a relatively successful model for a time and would be happy to help answer any questions if I can. Main piece of advice is Don’t pay for anything - not an admin fee or for any photographs for a ‘portfolio’

She's 11. You and her dad are 'quite against the idea' so therefore you don't go along with it at all. It's ludicrous.
How on Earth could she apply herself and give consent as an 11 yr old?
She's pretended to be you in order to give consent.
I'd be tackling her about the lying.

I also don't think it sounds very reputable.

Needless to say, you should NEVER be asked for money upfront to pay for a portfolio. Those places are scams.

She's 11. She doesn't get to decide these things unilaterally. Why are you so worried about saying No to something which is patently a terrible idea?

I'd be very careful with an "agency" that takes an interest in an unsolicited 11 year old's application.

Is it a reputable agency she's contacted? There are a huge numbers of photographic studios/agencies that essentially make money by approaching young girls, telling them they have 'model potential', getting them in for a 'test' and then insisting/flogging them photos at an exorbitant rate. Most of these there is no chance they will ever get model work out of it. I'd be a bit suspicious that this agency have asked her to come in so quickly without ever having seen her (did she send photos/body stats) particularly with Covid etc. Definitely google for reviews!

If it's a high fashion/catwalk type agency, whether or not someone has 'model potential' is very little to do with being (conventionally) beautiful, they are looking for a very specific very tall/willowy/skinny body type and more unusual/distinctive facial features. So if your DD is rejected it really isn't that she isn't a very pretty girl but if she's unlikely to be tall enough it will always be a non starter.

I can totally understand you being against this and if it was my DD, I think even if it was the most reputable brilliant agency opportunity in the world I would think very carefully about letting her go in. That isn;t being unsupportive, it's being responsible and protecting her as a parent IMO, she is too young to do this for herself. There are other ways you can support an interest and ambition in fashion, e.g. encouraging her to get into make-up, design, textiles, history of fashion etc. where there is much less risk of harm and hurt feelings (or worse)!

11 is way too young to start modelling, imo, but it does happen. Is this a specialist children's agency?

Do as much research as you can about the agency. Email them back and ask about their policies for working with minors. Tell them about your concerns. If they don't have ready and reassuring answers, don't work with them.

You know her. Does she have the mental strength to be rejected for 9/10 castings? Does she want it that much?

I would say, talk truthfully to her and then say you'll revisit it when she's 13 or 14, at the earliest.

She's 11 and sent photos in of herself if they want to see her? And presumably lied about parental permission. I'd say no just from the angle of the lying and lack of internet safety being demonstrated.

Hi - she didn't lie. She told me she was doing it... I just let her and thought it wouldn't come to much. I have to say she is patient and resilient. But I've tried finding this company online and their information is quite hidden. No outright name or company number. Thank you @ChelseaCat I don't have a good gut feeling but don't want to seem unsupportive. Would you cancel if you were me?

What's the name of the company?

What sort of company looks at unsolicited pics of an 11 year old.
Just say no.

Do not pay anything. She only has an agent if they act on her behalf and take a portion of earnings. If they are genuine there will be no fees. I would check reviews

Yes cancel it sounds dodgy

If you can't find any details about them online, this is either a scam or some dodgy pervert.

Cancel immediately.

100% cancel.
Buy her a model experience with a local studio photographer for birthday or Christmas or something?
If you’ve got the cash there might even be people doing outdoorsy Shoots and stuff now.

Thanks. Cancelled it. Don't know why I couldn't say no to her... Just didn't want to quash her interests. Thanks @maxelly I've offered to support her interest if she wants to learn about fashion etc... Thanks all.

How tall is she? Will she grow to be at least 5’10”? Because if not, don’t bother. They will want you to pay for her to have professional photos taken but unless she has the height she won’t make it.

Oops, never mind!

Good news.

Something I forgot to add earlier: there are also people out there who claim to be scouts for some of the larger agencies. Very easy to verify the identity of these people by simply calling the agency directly.

But I've tried finding this company online and their information is quite hidden.

That sounds dodgy AF.

Tell her to give it a couple of years and you will help her look into reputable routes. Hopefully teen self consciousness or ethical opposition will kick in!

Seriously though this is a teaching opportunity for get rich quick schemes, too good to be true, child sexual exploitation etc. Like you could say to her, gosh someone on Mumsnet told me there are dodgy firms that just use the photos you send for profit without telling or paying you, or even worse some that ask for more revealing photos which are obviously illegal at your age - thank goodness you didn't get caught up in that, I'm so glad you were up front about what you were doing. Like you are learning together.

I think you made the right decision.
So many of these things are scams. Getting people to pay for photos. It actually happened to me as a teenager.

I got ''scouted'' twice on oxford street a card given to me and asked to come in for a test shoot. Low and behold it was just a scam to sell very expensive pics and nothing more came of it. However, my boyfriend was a model with a very well known agency (Kate Moss was with them) he never paid a penny for anything even hair cuts, sometimes going to see them they'd even send a car! So it was very much them taking the lead with absolutely everything.
Sidenote: It didn't do much for his self esteem / worth in the end 🙁 wasn't a v happy outcome.

Have you checked any social media she might have?
DD showed a sudden interest in modelling several years ago and it turned out someone had contacted her through FB claiming to be a scout for a reputable agency, they'd asked her for swimwear pictures and when she declined tried to arrange a meet up.