Pregnant again, first child is 15months old...

[LittleTwiglet]

so, I've just found out I'm pregnant again, my dd is 15 months, and won't even be 2 when the new baby is born.

Is this too soon? How will it be/ways to cope? I'm just so worried it might be too soon. Please can someone give their views or experiences to give me an insight?

I would worry about returning to work pregnant. Awful for the business and your career. I was thinking about this recently because I'm currently 29 weeks pregnant so dealing with sorting cover for my mat leave.

Mine are 22 months apart. Ds will be three in sept and Dd one next week.

It was and still sometimes is hard. But in the last six weeks or so Dd has started bum shuffling and trying to pull herself up and is more active than she was. So easier to deal with the two of them.

As a previous poster said double buggy if you can. If not buggy board or a sling.

Bath at the same time. Bed at the same time. Etc. And get Dd to help with baby. We had ds fetching nappies and holding the wipes etc. He was a bit confused at first when we brought Dd home from hospital but then went into big brother mode - showing his baby off to everyone who came to visit.

When he came to see me in hospital and to meet Dd he was more bothered by the fact the bed went up and down and that the midwife brought him some ice cream than Dd....

Also accept all help offered and if you can pay for help - cleaner etc. Short term pain financially.

22 months between my two. They are now adults so when they were born, there was no paternity leave and no wfh. Dh took a week of annual leave when ds1 was born but then I was left with both DC. My parents live 90 minutes away and worked - mum was a head teacher so she couldn't even have annual leave to come and stay.

Tbh, it was hard work but much more enjoyable than with ds1. I was far more relaxed and also I kept ds1 having afternoon naps so that I could catch up on sleep. Ds1 was a very good sleeper which helped.

17 months between mine, no family nearby and dh working very long hours. Like others have said, routine is the way to go, to be fair my second child had to fit in with my first child, they both napped in the afternoon and ds would fall asleep whilst I was bathing dd in the evening. It was hard at the very beginning, but things fell into place pretty quickly and they have a fantastic relationship now they are in their twenties. I would definitely recommend getting out to groups, maybe if there are activity focussed groups you won't feel so anxious as you wont be the focus.

I was the exact same!

Not gonna say it's been easy but it's been ok! The little one has been super easy due to me having to run after his older brother and not being able to pander to him! He also got into a routine much faster. I breastfed and many a time I'd be chasing the toddler around softplay with poor DS2 clinging onto my nipple for dear life

You'll be fine op, many people have around a 2 year age gap!

My two fight like cat and dog tho so don't assume they'll be best pals!

Congratulations

21 months between ours. We moved house before dc2 arrived, an hour from family, and I knew noone.
It was hard but also joyful, they adore each other, and are now 7 & 9 so we've survived!
Definitely when naps synchronised it was awesome, I also had a fab HomeStart volunteer once a week for a while.
DC1 was a late walker and loved a good post-lunch nap so I used the double buggy a lot, but also had a single buggy and variety of slings for them both.

I also just found out I'm pregnant and DS is 15 months, however we were TTC for 6 months so for me, the gap is definitely not too small. I know a HELL of a lot of people who either have siblings 2 years older / younger, and plenty of friends who planned having kids 2 years apart. I'd understand your concern if your baby was 15 weeks old, but an age gap of 2 years is very normal and really isn't much to shout about

22 months between my 1st 2, now age 9 ds (10 in a month) & 8 dd. First 6 months was very hard, dd did not stop crying and I had pnd, but improved by age 1, in fact they were both lovely at the age 2/3/4 stage! Much easier having them close in age as they could share toys and play together etc. They are still very close. I never bothered with a double buggy as ds was a great walker. I had my 3rd a week after eldest turned 5 & dd was 3. Try structured baby groups, like hartbeeps, baby sensory, Jo jingles etc. I found them much better and more enjoyable, so did dc.

Another 23 month gap here - two boys aged 4 and 6. Our second was a Wednesday night one-shot wonder, and I had very similar feelings to you about whether it was two soon. I’d also had a very traumatic first delivery and was very anxious. A wise friend reassured me that it really didn’t matter because I won’t know any different.

I’m not going to lie and say it’s always been easy, some of those early days were tough, we also don’t have a good family support network nearby. But I have some great friends. And it was fine, they’re close in age which means they have similar interests, which makes family time easier, my second is such a lovely little boy and they are very close (when they’re not thumping each other). They’re currently invading each other’s space in front of the tv.

You can do this. It will be messy, it will be sometimes crazy, but it will also be wonderful!

Mine are 19 months apart. Just turned 26 months and 7 months now. I was terrified but it's actually been ok. They occasionally scream at the same time but not often and it's usually something easy to fix for at least one of them. I've got quite quick at chores and economical with my time. I think you'll be fine. Their interests are different at the moment but in a few years they'll align and in the next 6 months they'll be able to ah together. I don't sniff at TV time, try to limit it but think of it as an activity like all others and definitely a useful tool for dinnertime/throwing laundry on. Sling has been invaluable this time too.

Ps. My cleaner found out she was pregnant when her youngest was 2 months 😵

Mine children are 13 months apart. Two years is not a small age gap

Thank you all so much for your stories and encouragement! It really does mean so much (and to know I'm not the only one who worried initially!).
I dont know how this coronavirus will affect everything now, like hospital appointments and things, but I guess that's the same for everyone in general!

I had a minor surgical procedure recently - the main differences were that I had to wear a mask at all times, I had my temperature taken on entry and I was the only person allowed in. I imagine it will be the same for your antenatal appointments. But it’s not that big a deal.

DDs are 18 months apart. It wasn't that bad at all. They are very close.

In terms of development they are very close as well. DD1 is a little speech delayed, DD2 talks as much as her! The older pushes the younger, especially at a close age.

Also toys are the same. There were a few weeks that DD1 could only play with playdough when DD2 was asleep. Very soon DD2 wasn't putting stuff in her mouth anymore and it was no issue to play together.

Good luck!!

I was exactly the same. Same age gap. First was IVF. Second was a complete surprise. Honestly , it was fine. 2nd baby was an easy dream compared to the first. Loved sleeping even though BF like the first. It will be ok! My two are close now and are good friends and playmates.