Will you tell me stories about your lovely parents?

[TheHumanRubbishBin]

So this might be a bit weird but I would really love to read about people who have good, positive relationships with their parents.

I have a very complicated relationship with my mum and I barely know my dad (but what I do know makes me dislike him). I try hard to be a good mother to my children but what if when they are grown they don't want to know me because despite trying my best it wasn't good enough? What if I do something that hurts them and leaves a permanent scar?

So if you have nice parents who you get along with, especially now you are an adult, please tell me about them?

I was a bit of a surprise baby so my dad was retired in my teen years.
He would get up every morning with me for school just to make me breakfast so he knew I'd eaten.
He would grumble about driving me places but always be the dad to collect us from god knows where at god knows what time.

He loved my kids so much.

I miss him- he died a few years ago.

It wasn't all roses though.

I've just read the rest of your op.

I'm sorry you had it rough. I think all parents worry about screwing up their kids.
Look at all the posts on this site!

Love them, tell them you love them, play with them(even when they are teens and pretend not to want you too), set boundaries that keep them safe but enable them to grow and learn. Listen to them.

My parents never set me a curfew, they always wanted to know, where I was, who I was with and what time I'd be home, I knew they would be awake whatever time that was.

Find the little things that make the difference.

My Dad was an old fashioned no-nonsense man. Didn't do emotional stuff. But when I was a young teenager and reading Agatha Christie he'd bring me home a new one every week (he scoured second hand shops to find them). And on weekend mornings he would bring me a mug of coffee and a McVitie's chocolate digestive in bed.

My dad is not a really hugger but he would do anything for me and my siblings. Even my brother who he's not that keen on! He has money out aside for us always that we can borrow and pay back to prevent us getting too much credit/loans.

If we need anything he'll come over and help sort it. He's just so available.

When we were young he was busy as he worked shifts etc but as a firefighter he was my absolute hero. We always went to the allotment with him or the library every weekend and he would help us invent and make stuff in the garage like rabbit hutches and barbie furniture!

Recently he gave my friend his old car when she was having a tough time just because she's my friend...he barely knows her!

My mum is irritating as hell but generous to a fault and always knew when to be quietly supportive, to not judge our mistakes but tell us when we were being ridiculous. She adores her grandkids and pays for extra clubs etc so they can have lots of enrichment. She never says no to babysitting.

I often feel like I can't live up to them as a parent, I'm careless with money and lazy with the kids at weekends but I hope they feel as supported as I do by my parents.

Op I have come to think it's luck whether you get on with your parents.
Someone in the relationship needs to be easy going and non judgemental and one hopes that is the parent.
You could be wondeful but then according to posters on here, read the wrong paper, vote against their politics and that's it, your dust.

I hope I can socialise with my dc and have fun with them..I think that's major key to good relations.

I probably grew apart from my dm a bit in my 20s - no fall out but just getting on with my own life which wasn't one she would approve of really! Then in my 30s - and especially once I'd children - we got on so well together again, and phoning her for a chat was one of my pleasures. She is gone now and I still miss her so much, but she gave me enough love to keep me going.

They have never criticised or judged me.

We had no money growing up but I would never have swapped my parents for anyone else's rich ones. Never.

When my eldest child was a baby and I spoke to her I heard my Mum's voice. Like a different frequency. One full of love.

My Dad always spoke to me like I was intelligent. I have to remind my dh that our children will internalise how he speaks to them so could he please stop speaking to them like they are stupid.

They didn't get everything right but their intentions were always spot on.

Mine weren’t very demonstrative when I was growing up but I always knew I was loved.
Like Venusandmars’ dad, mine would buy me things when he picked up on interests. Once he bought me a telescope when he found out I was interested in astronomy. I still love astronomy
They would do little things like buy our favourite foods when they went shopping.
They instilled a good work ethic in me and expected me to work hard at school.
They were never controlling and respected my decisions. They gave me a lot of freedom but also had expectations.
This helped me to become a secure, resilient and independent adult. I’m thankful to them for that.