To people with grown up kids, do you think they still cost you just as much ?!

[Lardlizard]

Even when they are grown up as that’s what my dh boss says !

What age do you mean by grown up?

Things get more expensive as they get bigger. Even with adult children I’ve found that even though we’re not necessarily buying them clothes things like their bday or Xmas presents are more expensive (and odd help with money is in large sums ) so yes I’d agree they cost just as much overall probably.

If they dont live in your house they shouldnt. I am a grown up and I cost my mum about £100 a year in birthday and christmas presents, plus maybe a meal out a few times a year.

My brother probably costs her a lot more because he lives at home still.

No. Well, I suppose she could, if I chose to spend money on her. I've got two teens at home though, who drain my bank account.

I mean, I get her the odd treat, but when I want to and can afford to.

My 2 youngest are 20 and 21 and it costs us £1000 per month (12 months a year) for them to go to uni. For five months a year they live at home eating us out of house and home so I'd say yes they do. We still have an annual family holiday which is very expensive but obviously that's our choice.

Depends....they shouldn't as in the majority of cases, once out of school/uni the dc should be able to pay for everything they need themselves.

However a lot of wealthier families I know keep paying for treats for their adult dc well into their 30s - taking them on frequent meals, going on luxurious family holidays where the parents pay for the dc and their partners, dentist treatment, buying them clothes on shopping trips a few times a year....I find it weird as I am happy to buy this stuff myself, that's why I go to work, but otoh my sister would LOVE it if my parents did the same for her, so who knows what's normal!

Also things like student accomodation and tuition fees, paying for weddings, dc living with their parents for much longer...all very expensive, in some cases much more than the cost of raising a younger child - of course parents don't have to contribute to any of these things, but many do.
And then of course a lot of people then treat their grandchildren with £££

As a pp says my parents prob give around £100 over bday and Xmas, an odd meal out that they treat me too... they do spend a fair bit on the grandchildren for bday/Xmas and random treats tho, so I guess me giving them 3 grandchildren costs them a lot!
My brother still lives at home, pays minimal rent, uses loads of electricity and water, they have to have top of range broadband cos of him lol and he eats a lot - so yes he costs a lot!

Only if you let them! Or want to.

It's controversial on MN but mine have contributed to their keep since they started work and pay for all their own personal expenses, clothes, phone etc. I do usually pay if we all go out together or on holiday but they will buy ice creams or a round of drinks too and that's a choice I make because I'd like them to come. I sometimes buy them treats and I'm generous with them at birthdays etc because I can be, but it's not expected.

So yes, I do still spend quite a lot of money on them but it's far more discretionary than when they were little and I was buying school uniform and swimming lessons and rarely went anywhere without them.

DH and I have definitely noticed we are more able to save now DC are "independent".

My own parents have occasionally given us very significant gifts but again, I've never asked, they've done it with IHT planning in mind because they wanted to, not because it was a necessary "cost".

I think they do if they still live at home, their clothes are more expensive, they consume more food, they need money for going out also then you factor in driving lessons etc, I would guess say it’s slightly more.

Definitely. Both DC are in low paid jobs (for various different reasons) and it doesn't take very much to knock their financial situation out of kilter.

OK, we could say to them 'it's up to you, you made your choices, etc' but why would we?

DC1 seriously affected by CV-19, so we've had to help out there, so they can afford to pay their rent - otherwise they would lose their home.

It would be cruel, actually, not to help them out when we can afford it.

No. The teenage DS costs a ruddy fortune as he keeps outgrowing shoes and clothes and eats a huge amount.

The older ones in their 20s cost me nothing. They are adults who work full time, live in their own homes and support themselves. (Obviously I cough up a present at birthdays and Christmas, but that's it).

We take ours and their partners on holiday sometimes. They’re all just starting out/at uni/hourly paid work, so we pay. And we take them out for meals/drinks which is always an expensive night out. But that’s what we choose to spend our money on. We enjoy their company and we’ve always enjoyed holidays and eating out as a family. I’m sure they’ll pay for us when DH and I retire