Things that are lovely but really not worth doing.

[OhWhatFuckeryIsThisNow]

I got a big bag of cheap limes. Just spent 2 hours making lime curd. I’m sticky, there’s sticky washing up and I’ve got a jar and a bit. It’s delicious but no better than prestige shop bought.
What else?

Not always, but sometimes.. two- night breaks.

Disagree about bread. I love kneading dough and find it really therapeutic. Once you have the hang of it, it's easy peasy and doesn't take that much time. I tend to do it when I'm cleaning the kitchen - start the bread, leave it proving whilst I clean, then finish it off.

Home-made mash - nope. I hate any hint of graininess or lumps, even tiny ones, so it needs to be perfectly smooth. Even using a ricer it's a massive faff - so much easier to buy ready made.

DIY hair streaking. OMG the fucking mess. I had a streaking cap my MIL gave me and it was a fucking nightmare, plus the end result looked like shit. I've never been so glad to go back to the hairdresser and hand over £££.

Gardening.
A lovely garden looks amazing but takes literally hours and hours to maintain. Fine if gardening is your thing. A gigantic pain in the ass if it isn't.

Homemade guacamole

I agree - but home-made is nicer, so I get DH to make it

Going to the beach

Steak is quite literally one of the easiest things to cook really well at home. Just need to take it out of the fridge at least an hour before and heat the pan first.

But you missed out the faffy bit, which is where your hot pan sizzles and spits fat everywhere, and the smell clings to everything in the house, and then you have a pan full of carbonised ridges to clean.

I'm a decent cook, quite happy to do home-made pasta or bread, make chutney, what have you.

But steak, no, still not convinced.

I agree with bread thing and it never tastes as good. I did discover the no knead method and that apparently was fantastic (I’m coeliac so another reason for not making it)
Ok, pizza dough experts-spill.
Guacamole-(which I hate) my Latina ex dil told me how her mum makes it. Avocado, salt, pepper, mayo, lemon juice. Whizz.

Best pizza dough recipe for very thin pizza - Hugh Fearnley Whittingstall one- honestly very easy and makes loads. it’s on his River Cottage website.

Baths.

I go for the slightly neglected and kind to the wildlife cottage garden look. Which does not require much effort.

@ButteryPuffin

Bread, definitely not worth it. Go to a good independent bakery and you're keeping them in business and saving yourself a load of work.

Disagree on steak - buy good quality and you can cook yourself a lovely steak at home! Plus you can sit down and eat while it's still rare. In a restaurant you always have the risk it's sitting around while other dishes from your table are finished off.

Yes to the steak, we buy it from a farm just down the road and it's delicious. I try to be environmentally friendlier with our meat so we get all our dairy products, beef and chicken from the farm and it somehow seems less wasteful as well as being less food miles - it's less than a mile away and it's all from their own cows/chickens.

I made my own clotted cream yesterday as Asda substituted double cream for clotted cream. 12 hours in the slow cooker followed by overnight chilling in the fridge. Didn’t taste that nice and the consistency was too hard.

I agree about pasta machines but I disagree about baking. Although I say it myself my brioche and malt loaf are absolutely delicious and I find them very satisfying to make.

Indian food. 40 minutes stirring a masala, waiting for the magic thing to happen while every pore and hair and every room in your house is permeated with the smell of onions and spice. Worst if it contains fenugreek. By the time it's done I am so over it.

Butter.

It was lovely but it wasn't any cheaper to make than decent shop bought and while yes it was very nice it wasn't significantly nicer to be worth having to churn it and sourcing cheesecloth.

Sunday dinner, just can't be arsed with the mountain of pots afterwards.

Disagree about guacamole - it’s not too much effort and is much nicer.

But feel v strongly about hummus. It never tastes as good as shop bought and is just not worth the effort!

Homemade hummus is lovely once it's had a day or two for the flavour to come out. But still not sure it's worth the effort!

Assembling guacamole isn’t too bad, it’s trying to ripen the avocados that’s an arse.

GrowIng your own vegetables.
Life’s too short IMO, but I love to buy them from my green-fingered neighbours when they have a glut. I currently have the joy of fresh green beans, tomatoes, cucumbers and zucchine with none of the work.
Otherwise supermarket is just fine.

Bread is worth it if you live somewhere without a decent local bakery! Croissants though...never again...frozen ones from the local farm shop (or Tesco’s) are much better than the funny hybrid things I produced at about twice the cost!

I love making bread, pizza, guacamole, hummus, cakes - all better than shop bought in the main.
BUT
This week I followed a recipe for 'No Knead Ciabatta' - did everything as directed (written recipe and Youtube demonstration) including an 18 hour prove.
The resulting loaf? A 1 cm thick roof tile.

I was dismayed!

Agree with everything on @EssentialHummus' list, except possibly BBQs.

Courgettes especially. It's a very short journey from 'Oh wow, we grew a courgette!' to weeping and dry heaving as you drag the 147th enormous beast into the kitchen.

I go for the slightly neglected and kind to the wildlife cottage garden look. Which does not require much effort.

I also blame the hedgehogs

Growing tomatoes. Require endless watering, feeding and fussing and produce about 12 'meh' fruit.

Gnocchi - every surface in the kitchen was covered with little starchy bits of potato and flour