When people remark “ You’re Looking Well” do they mean you’ve put weight on?

[BrandyandBabycham]

I’ve noticed that when people say this to me, it is when I have got bigger. Maybe I’m being over sensitive. I am quite a lot heavier at the mo due to hitting the bottle during lockdown. Maybe it’s a wake up call.

I get this from men, now that I've lost weight. Women are like 'omg look at you, you skinny bitch!' etc but men tread cautiously and say 'have you been running more? Yeah, you're looking well'.

So no, I think you probably look great and they're giving you a compliment.

if they're male they're too polite to say I would totally shag you

no, it means you don't look like you are on death's door.
nothing else.

I usually say it to people who look healthier/nicer than usual (e.g clearer/radiant skin, nice new haircut, nice outfit, etc. Also if they look more cheery than usual.

I personally wouldn't use thst phrase for someone who I'd thought had gained weight.

I don't know about weight. No one would say "you've put weight on" unless you had been seriously underweight before. I wouldn't say someone looked well if I thought they looked fat.
It used to irritate me when I was on chemotherapy. I may have looked "well" on account of having a steroid induced flush but I was pretty ill.

When I say it, I mean there's something particularly vivacious about you today, and it has nothing to do with size or weight. But from previous threads, you are not alone in perceiving it as a comment on weight gain. For me, it would be a massive compliment, as I'm on the skelf side of skinny and would.love to gain a couple of stone, I would certainly look "well" on it.

When l day that it is never about people’s weight. It’s more they look rested / glowing

Usually if you have lost weight but they don't want to ask. If they are saying it when you put on weight are you usually naturally very thin because they may be saying you look more attractive when you are less thin.

‘You look good!’ = you look better than the last time I saw you

‘You look well’ = chubby

I say it to people who are generally looking good. It has never occurred to me that it would be taken as an insult.

I've always interpreted it as "I want to (appear to) be friendly towards you but don't actually have anything to say."!

I usually get this if I wear makeup and put on a dress (rare).

I’ve often thought it is what people say to me when I’ve gained weight and they haven’t seen me for a while. They want to say something nice and it’s the best they can come up with! That said, it could easily be that I’m overthinking it as I’m feeling sensitive about my weight...

People seem to say it to me when ive been in the sun a bit!

It’s a compliment where I’m from (NW). It means you look healthy and happy.

There is no turn of phrase that someone on MN won’t take offence at, so you may receive other responses.

I also use it when people are looking rested, happy, glowing, healthy, particularly well put together or some combination of those things.

It never means 'put weight on'. I think the vast majority of the population wouldn't say anything about someone putting weight on.

My SIL said that when people said this to her it would trigger her ED as to her it meant she’d put weight on.

I’m expecting people to say it to me next week because I have been outside most of this week and have lost the grey pallor that has built up over lockdown. I have never associated it with being fat, either in saying it or having it said to me (or if it was meant to mean that then the passive aggressive intent has totally passed me by).

I've only heard on MN that it means chubby.

I don't know anyone in real life who would use it to say anything other than what it means. Well. I.e. happy healthy rested...

Also what kind of person would say that as a code for fatter? Assumption is that people aren't very nice in general and use a lot of coded language which I don't think is true

I mean obviously if you'd been very ill, then putting on weight again might well be a part of looking well. But again, it's a positive thing.

I remember posting on a thread asking exactly this once before, I don't suppose it was the same OP, it's probably been posted many times but it got quite heated. Iirc the overwhelming view was that people mean nothing more than that you look well

I get this from family when I put weight on! 🙄 They think they're being nice as think I look healthier but it doesn't feel like a compliment to me!

I use it to mean ‘not knackered’. Surely no one would make a reference to weight being put on, even if it was in a coded way?

Over 70 = congratulations on still being alive
Over 40 = you're ageing well
Under 40 = you're looking a bit chubby

It means that you look well. You're projecting your own insecurities about your weight gain into other people.

No, it doesn't mean you have put on weight. I have only come across (paranoid) people who think this on mumsnet. It means you look well (as in not ill).

A compliment is a compliment. Only the professionally offended look for an insult where there is none intended

Depends who says it.

Normal, friendly person says it and it means you look good / great / happy.

Horrible person says it, could have unpleasant undertones. But equally, could mean you look good / great / happy.