My 7yo is so materialistic

[Pansypath]

He just wants things and obsesses over them - not even necessarily expensive things, but that too. We obviously are trying to teach him to budget and save, but it is disconnected from that - so he will fixate on something he will never have like a quad bike or a castle) and for a week or two that is all he will talk about, starting off asking for it, moving on to being cross he isn't getting it, obsessing about how he could earn enough money to get one, then moving on to "when I am 18 I will get one and you can't stop me." And then it stops, he forgets it, and the next obsession appears. Much worse in lockdown than it was before. And since it has eased and we took him to spend accumulated pocket money from lockdown in a shop he is slightly less bad - eg the last obsession was a type of headphone and it lasted a week rather than two weeks and he spoke about it a lot but not as much as the other things. Anyone else had this and any advice?

Oh it's like you're describing my DD! She started this sort of behaviour aged about 7 too...and she's 12 now but slowly, she's stopped.

It probably stopped about last year.

I have encouraged her into obsessions which are free or cheap...at the moment it's "Being a Hedge Witch" which is basically learning all about herbal remedies...she makes salves from stuff she's picked etc.

I connected it to too much Youtube OP. Does he watch a lot?

Hello! It's good that you've recognised this. Do they watch YouTube kids by any chance?

Sorry didn't read the post above!

I read a tip once that I've found useful, if a kid is saying they want something, turn it in to a normal conversation or get them to research it, rather than focusing on the buying part. So instead of saying "no you can't have a jet ski obviously, they are way to expensive". You could say "yeah wouldn't a jet ski be so cool, you go so fast, where would you like to ride it" etc.

I mean adults talk about things like this all the time, kids are just doing things the same sometimes but in a more clumsy way.

@1300cakes

I read a tip once that I've found useful, if a kid is saying they want something, turn it in to a normal conversation or get them to research it, rather than focusing on the buying part. So instead of saying "no you can't have a jet ski obviously, they are way to expensive". You could say "yeah wouldn't a jet ski be so cool, you go so fast, where would you like to ride it" etc.

I mean adults talk about things like this all the time, kids are just doing things the same sometimes but in a more clumsy way.

My dd is 12 and she is too. Although I am somewhat trying to get a handle on it. This technique works. She likes looking on right move. Fantasies about a massive dream houses... we have talked fantasies.

Tell me about it ,
My 10 year old daughter is on tick tock ( I monitor it ) .
And all she has been talking about is getting a trampoline .
I have said she can have one but we only have a small garden so 8 Ft is the max we can have , which looks good but she said it’s too small and embarrassing .😫
That’s social media for you .
But what can we do , ban them from it ?

Yes he loves youtube!

That way of moving on a conversation a great tip - I will try that. Thank you all so much

I was like this, and dd was like this when younger.

She’s 14 now, and l swear she is becoming some sort of Marie Kondo or whatever it is. Dislikes makeup, clothes, any frippery bits, only wants small bits of furniture. This is a child who could racket up 30 quid in the Primark display of shite where you queue.

Reassuring that some grow out of it. My dd is 11 and is terrible for obsessing over things. Money burns a hole in her pocket and unfortunately/fortunately she has over generous grandparents so seems to have an endless flow of cash 🙄.

Do you know what he watches mainly? Theres a big YouTube culture of children watching other children and 'famous YouTube families' obsess over and open up toys, games, basically all materialistic objects, and it's highly unrealistic! Obviously the children and YouTube families are getting sponsored by a lot of brands so they give off these fake excited reactions and it gives children the idea that this is normal for everyone else a well.

He used to love that and Ryan’s toy reviews but now he loves the silly challenges - how long can you spend in a bathtub etc. So tedious.... dd likes watching things like water balloons being run over by tyres which is in fact strangely compelling.

Sounds strange to us but very normal for that age, it seems! I'd just try and get them out into nature as much as possible, enjoying experiences more than objects but I do think it's quite normal for tat age, sadly!