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When did you know it was time to start a family

5 replies

igotmyreddressontonight · 02/07/2020 15:44

I'm 26, DP is 30 in a few months. We've been together for almost 6 years. We've just bought a lovely house after years of renting and earn a decent wage between us. For the past year I'm constantly thinking about us being a family and what sort of things we will do and I often have dreams where I'm pregnant/have a little family. I look at babies and my heart just warms, I feel so broody and I can't wait to have my own. Everyone around me is either pregnant or have just had babies.

DP is great with his nieces/nephews and it's so lovely to see. He works away during the week but I have a good support system and would have help from my parents and his when they're not at work. I don't mind him working away and he likely will long term as that's what his job requires and that's where the money is.

We want 2 and with him being 30 this year I feel like times ticking if we don't do it soon. It feels like there's always something.. new car needed which were saving for to buy outright so will take a while, I'm in the middle of a course which will take another year and we'd like to have another holiday or 2.

How old where you and your partner when you had your children and how did you know the time was right? Did you ensure you had everything in place, savings, cars, house fully sorted first? We do have savings but it's not a huge amount and our house should be done in the next few months there isn't much left to do.

OP posts:
Davodia · 02/07/2020 15:48

I was 38 and at the point where if I didn’t have a baby now I wouldn’t be able to. I’d have waited longer if I could. I never felt broody though, it was literally a “now or never” situation.

GoingBackTo505 · 02/07/2020 15:52

I was 29 when I had baby number 1. I'll be 31 one this one comes in December. My partner is a year older than me. Our first baby wasn't planned but very much wanted and made me realise there's never ever a right time. You can have all the plans, savings etc and what's meant to happen will happen anyway. It could take a long time to get pregnant, you could have an "accident" tomorrow. I'm not one for having big plans anymore as I've learnt nothing ever goes to plan! If you're broody and you want a baby and so does your partner, go for it!

igotmyreddressontonight · 02/07/2020 15:57

If DP said to me tomorrow let's try for a baby now I don't think I'd hesitate, he wants to wait until we have all the things mentioned in place though, which could be years. I know he definitely wants children and isn't using excuses as we talk about it and I could wait another year max especially with everything going on, but ideally I'd want a 3-4 year age gap so with his age I feel like times ticking.

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Teacher12345 · 02/07/2020 16:09

I was 23 and in hindsight too young. Id say if you feel ready then go for it. You sound financially okay and settled. It won't be any easier or harder just because you waited another 2 years.
All I would say is to make sure you have had some great holidays etc and times together. You will need those memories when parenting and everyday shit drags you down!

IndieRo · 02/07/2020 16:15

I was 26, dd is now 12. DH and I were together 9 years, had our wedding booked and has bought a home two years previously. It was the next step for us.

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