I need some advice on how to deal with a situation with exDH leaving kids alone when he is supposed to be spending access time with them.
I have 3 kids with exDH aged 8, 5 and 2, we separated last year due to escalating violence from him towards our eldest.
The police and social services were involved, exDH had supervised access for a while and now things have settled down, he has regular time with the kids (atm just at my house due to covid). He sees them 2 evenings in the week and spends Sunday with them, he often arranges things for Saturday's as well. He wants more time and overnights despite him telling me he can't cope with all 3.
Tuesday night he came to spend time with the kids, I used this time to go shopping as I do each week. Once exDH had gone DS1 (8) told me that exDH had taken DD (5) out and left him alone with the toddler, he didn't know where his dad went, had no way of communicating with him or me and the 2 year old is a kamikaze Houdini (he is being monitored by the HV as she suspects autism). From what he said I'm estimating they were alone about 30 minutes. I gently questioned DD the next day in a "did you have fun with daddy" way and she told me he'd taken her to the park in his car!
I've contacted the family support worker for advice but had nothing back yet. I know there is no legal age as to when you can leave children home alone but surely leaving an 8 year old responsible for a 2 year old is stupid and reckless.
I need advice as to what to do. I obviously can't leave him alone with them again but can I stop him taking any of them out by himself?
Additional info: ExDH switches between nice and nasty with me constantly, I'm trying to keep the peace for the sake of the kids. He questions DD all the time (DS1 won't engage with this) and throws any info he gets from her at me. He is also threatening me with taking 1 of the kids as it's not fair I get to keep all 3. He lives with his parents and there is no space for the kids to stay overnight.