Feeling a bit flat but possibly overreacting

[BrandyandBabycham]

I chose to stay off work as I was worried about contracting CV ( my shop was deemed essential so remained open). I finished just before lockdown & will return next week. Get on well with the majority of colleagues & a few I count as friends outside work. Anyway, I posted in the group chat to say I was coming back. No response at all. I obviously don’t expect them to put the bunting out or anything & I haven’t been ill but I did think some of them could at least have said they would be pleased to see me. When I individually messaged a couple that I’m quite close to, they did say it would be lovely to see me back but I just thought I might have got some comments in the group chat. They were all asking about the rota at the time I posted so perhaps my message just “ slipped through the net”.

I'm sorry, things like that can mean a lot right now 🌷

I think though, people were probably just in 'practical' mode and it probably didn't register beyond how many people could be fostered on.

Try not to take it personally 🌷

Did they all carry on working while you decided not to? Were you furloughed or on unpaid leave?

Maybe they feel a bit upset that they've been working to keep their jobs but you've been off and your job has been kept open for you?
Maybe they are jealous they couldn't afford to stay off and do what you have done?
Maybe they are upset they've had to cover your shifts/work?
Maybe your message did 'slip through the net'?

Did you take unpaid leave through that time or were you furloughed?
It’s been a difficult time for many, maybe there’s a bit of resentment that they were working throughout despite the risks?
Although if they have personally said to you that they are happy to see you back then I wouldn’t be too bothered about a group chat. Maybe just had other things on their mind at the time? Busy with work/family etc.

I haven’t been paid anything at all for all those weeks & to be honest I couldn’t really afford to stay off but DH & I have managed. If it was another colleague choosing to do what I did, I wouldn’t judge them. It was really difficult to decide what to do & I felt really torn

I suspect there is a bit of resentment even though you weren't being paid that they had to carry on working.

Maybe some jealousy then that they couldn’t afford to make the decision you did.

I think it might have slipped through the net, WhatsApp type of chats are tricky like that. Very transient!

Maybe message again when its quieter checking who is in when so you bring enough cakes on your first day back

They’re pissed off at you increasing their workload while you stayed home safe and they took the risk. Rather obviously.

Would some of them have had to pick up your shifts while you were off?

There was a lot of resentment at branches all over the country that the stores remained open. Of course not everyone could choose not to work because someone had to run the stores. Should I message again & tell my colleagues how difficult my decision was? DD has additional needs & I felt it was good for her that I was at home

I’m on tills & only work part time so my absence wouldn’t have put people out too much. Some new guys have started so they’d be happy working on tills or on the shopfloor.

@BrandyandBabycham

There was a lot of resentment at branches all over the country that the stores remained open. Of course not everyone could choose not to work because someone had to run the stores. Should I message again & tell my colleagues how difficult my decision was? DD has additional needs & I felt it was good for her that I was at home

I really wouldn’t say that. It won’t help I don’t think.

I am unable to go into work at the moment and my partner teacher was a little funny with me at first. I’m now doing a lot more at home than she is with her bubble at school (she told me this before anyone jumps on me).

I too think they’ll feel resentful that you’ve not been in.

No don’t add any justification - just let it slide. You made the right decision for your family and were lucky it was possible so leave it at that. You have friends to return to - build it up from there and don’t expect too much of people.

I’ve been in a similar position, I was told to shield while my colleagues kept working. I messaged to say I wasn’t able to go in and no-one replied. One colleague has messaged me since to see how I am (team of about 30).
I think it’s possibly some people being miffed that you were off at home (whatever your reasons) and you’ve slipped through the net. Everyone is having their own issues - it’s a weird time for everyone - and maybe people just aren’t in a place where they can respond to you.

I think if people were resentful that stores stayed open then there probably is some jealousy that you were able to not work over the period and they didn’t have the same choice. Not saying it’s justified to feel like that, but it’s been a very difficult time for many people. They probably felt a bit like they were ‘in it together’.
I’m sure all will be fine when you’re back.

Just focus on getting back to work and pulling your weight. It’ll soon be like you’ve never been away. I don’t mean this unkindly but others have worked through this risky time and may feel resentment. The best way to overcome this is just to get back to work.

Good luck, hope it goes well!

Getupagain I like the cakes idea