How to reign it in

[JustFloatingBy]

This may end up being a rant, or possibly just a "woe is me".... So I'm sorry if it does 😊

For the last 10 years I have given 110% at my job. It's been (mostly) recognised and I've enjoyed it, but more and more recently I've noticed that I have "nothing left over".

This has come to a head recently as for the last 2 years I've had a different role and given 125%, balancing this against a husband with a full time job and DS (now 3).

The details (probably) don't matter, but something happened 2 months ago which made me realise that the 125% isn't recognised or appreciated.

So.... I'm the type of person who cannot help but dedicate myself to whatever it is I am focused on. Does anyone have any good suggestions as to how to reign this back?

I've come to realise that it's my family who are the most important thing in my life and whilst my job offers me satisfaction and a sense of value, it's not where I should be directing most of my efforts. So how do I learn to only give 100% at work? I need to recognise that when I leave at the end of the day that's it.

I think that, like many other things, this is practiced behaviour.

Set a time in advance that you'll log off at the end of the day and stick to it. Put on an out of office message if that helps. Don't check emails through the evening or weekend and when you start to ponder or plan work activity, actively change your thoughts.

It's difficult, especially if you are working on something of particular interest or importance and sometimes you'll have to be flexible in your approach.

Working 125% of your hours is only sustainable for a short time and no decent manager would encourage this long term.

Thanks @robjzh 😁

The problem with my job is that (probably the same as most) you could work all the hours under the sun and still not complete everything. It isn't a case of poor time management, just too much work and not enough people.

Thank you for the encouragement @ProfMcGonigle those are good tips.

By 125%, I meant more effort as opposed to time, but it is both really. In my job, it's far too easy to work 55+ hours... There have been numerous occasions when I've not seen my LO for 3 days because I've left the house at 06.30 and not got back until 20.00.... And of course I don't get financial recompense for all those hours....

Feeling disheartened really that I appear to have sold myself so cheaply over the years when apparently it's not recognised.