Totally burnt out and feel like it never gets easier

[Thefab3]

I’ve woken up with a raging ear infection , have had these a few times in the past so know the signs....
My entire face aches and feel like my ear is also under water. 3 kids who are full of beans and need a lot of exercise.
4 months of absolutely no school /preschool and “ maybe” back in September but who knows.
I’ve just hit a wall...We have the added complication of moving house as bought a place to do up so my dh is doing is job and also some of the building work ( we have to as we don’t have the money for every job to be covered by trades people) , in a really crappy rental with no garden etc as it’s cheap and thought pre-lockdown we wouldn’t be here much because of work and school.
I’m doing a few hours of work but have had to take some time off as youngest is just 3 and no way I can work and look after them.
I’ve just reached a point where I’m so run down and exhausted. My dh is absolutely fantastic and we’ve always been 50/50 but it’s simply not possible at the mo , he has the better paid job and we need that and we need to work on house so can move. I’m on my own 6 days a week with the dcs and they are great but normal kids who need a lot of care and attention and my dcs in particular are very , very busy..
I feel like we had finally reached a good place in September of me back working , everyone settled in school and preschool and I was back exercising and being able to go to an appointment etc. Just feel like I’ve been exhausted going on 8 years and it’s not getting easier but harder...
Sorry for rant , looking for reassurance I’m not the only one..

Definitely not alone. I wish I knew what to say but I hear you! It’s really frustrating when life keeps throwing curveballs and you don’t see an end to it. I keep having crashes where I just can’t see the point in doing anything as it’s just endless. I then pick myself up a bit and get some stuff done.

Please try and forget about anything other than keeping the kids fed and safe until your ear infection is better though. They can really take it out of you and it’s better to rest up fully and heal rather than push through it.

Thanks, I know we are lucky in many ways , it’s just that I don’t ever feel rested or relaxed anymore. I’m 35 but look like crap , always wreaked looking. I had really bad sleepers for years also although it’s better now.
My friends are all having their first now and I just feel so jaded or so far removed from the beautiful newborn Instagram snaps they are sharing like I’m almost cynical (really isn’t like me and I really am happy for them) as I’m 8 years down the line and feel really burnt out..
There is literally hundreds of things to do all the time especially with the house move and literally impossible to do it with three dcs with us all the time.
There is no childcare available where I live as pre covid childminders were in very short supply anyway and babysitters here charge 10 euros per hour which can get very expensive. At the moment we just don’t have the money for this.
I feel we are always talking about when things get easier but they just don’t really..

I hear you. We have 2 children with complex medical needs and disabilities . They both need round the clock care and one is shielding.
We have actually coped really well for the 14 weeks of lockdown so far . Obviously no support at all at present.
Bit today I have hit the wall as well. We have scaffolding up all round the house as we are having outside work done and now the gas people have decided to replace the gas mains right outside.
They are here from 6.30 banging, drilling and digging so there is no peace at all now for a few weeks . Great timing !
I have decided that I am downing tools today and going to slob about as much as I can doing as little as possible.
I suggest you do the same. Stick the kids in front of the tv, go back to bed with a good book , eat lots of cake etc and don't feel the least bit guilty. I hope you feel better soon. X

That sounds very tough and I hope that you get some peace and quiet soon.
Think it’s the fact that I’m on my own so much that’s made it difficult. Also my 3 year old doesn’t like tv 😫 but does like screaming and climbing everything.all.day...