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Urgent Advice Needed

3 replies

NewName2106 · 21/06/2020 09:38

Just changed name to save being identified.

A close family member in 70's has just moved with her H into a new house to be nearer friends and family.

She has confided in me by phone, that her H is not adjusting to the change, and hates the move, has no joy in the house etc. The house is very different but will be lovely once they have decorated it to their taste. He was the one who wanted to move the most.

He is threatening to hurt himself. I need to support them both but not sure how to approach this.

My opinion is that he is feeling like this as he has lost control of his wife, because she now has a support network around her and she is not reliant on him any more. She does not drive, but can now get taxis and has family/friends around her that can support her. She was reliant on him before to take her everywhere, as she cannot drive and there was no local transport where they lived previously.

They have not registered with local drs as the move is so recent.

Clearly lots going on that maybe I am not party too. But I find him very controlling.

Any ideas on how to support them?

OP posts:
LIZS · 21/06/2020 09:44

Does he have form for this perhaps , and you just never knew? is the threat to self harm serious or just to get a reaction form her? Be at the end of the phone to support her , maybe suggest a helpline in case.

NewName2106 · 21/06/2020 09:47

I honestly think he’d not do anything, I think he’s just threatening so that she’s frightened to leave him. To keep control of her.

OP posts:
NewName2106 · 21/06/2020 09:49

He won’t seek help for his depression ....he refuses to go to the drs.

OP posts:
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