Just found out I'm pregnant but..

[88Pandora88]

So basically I have an almost 6 year old girl, and a 6 month old girl too. And I've just discovered I'm pregnant.
Me and husband haven't had much chance to discuss yet as eldest is always in earshot.

I don't know if I want another but don't know if I could get rid either.

There's so much to think about, the girls share a bedroom and we were about to turn the box room into a toy room, so there is the potential for the to be a bedroom...
I don't know 🤦🏻‍♀️

My last period was 4 weeks ago so I'm literally only a few weeks pregnant. If I do abort, I'd want to do it now before it's formed properly etc but don't know how it'd affect me and if I could go through with it.

Please no judging. I'm just after advise from those who have been in similar situations. How did you feel? what did you do?

That's really hard op. I don't think anyone can help with this decision but I have much sympathy. Whatever you decide it will be the right thing.

Can I ask were you using contraception or relying on breastfeeding? I only ask as we have a 4mo and recently didn't use anything as a 1 off.

Space doesn't sound like such an issue, since you have the extra room. You could make it work having 2 close together and your older girl if you wanted to. Perhaps a full and frank discussion with DH.
I had a termination years ago, with some councellling first - not sure if they still offer that.

As with any loss, you feel better with time.

I wouldn't discount a termination just because you anticipate bad feelings.

Nor am I saying you should abort.

However, in my opinion it's best to make sure this is a wanted baby before keeping it. If it isn't a wanted baby, then the discussions you really need to be having are about how you can get support. Many hospitals have a line to a counsellor for both you and your partner, and you should make it clear to your partner now what your expectations of him would be, and he of you.

If you've any close friends or family, rope them in. Some people might even be willing to have the kids for a week to let you process things, or at least bring dinner round and have a cup of tea with you to let you get all of your feelings out.

It might also be worth calling your GP to see if any one can offer some unbiased counselling before you make a decision, and to talk about the different ways of terminating so you have all of the facts.

I hope you manage to find time to talk to your husband, and whatever you choose you've got my hand hold.

I'm so sorry you're in this situation, so hard. I would absolutely wait until you know what you want to do; a week or two longer isn't going to make a difference. I always find it helps to write down how I feel about things. Obviously ensure no one can find it, esp not your 6yr old. Then wait until you can have a proper conversation with DH once the kids are in bed.

PS you don't need other people saying what they would do in your situation; its what you want to do that matters. They cant possibly know all the ins and outs by reading a post.