I had this 'friend' for two years whom I only met twice. I did not warm to her totally in the beginning so for the first year or so I kept my distance and felt quite dubious.
I slowly got to know her more and we both warmed to each other as we slowly opened up. We both run a business of our own and it was helpful to know somebody who was also working for themselves to combat the feelings of isolation that can sometimes come up.
For 3-4 months her business was really struggling for money and I tried to help her so much. It got that I did not feel she valued my opinion or my time and friendship as all she did was ignore all the advice and support I gave no matter what I said. Even though I know it would have helped her. I don't expect somebody to take on board everything I say as each to their own and all that but why be so foolish as to not take heed of some of my advice as I know it would have really helped?
In the end I had to call it a day as I was finding it draining and it was blocking me from living my life in a positive way. It was too time consuming and draining for me. I sent her a text on the day I wished to stop speaking on the 'phone. I offered to just keep in touch by text and no longer any 'phone calls. She rejected this and just decided to no longer be in contact. Which is fine as I felt relieved.
Now I have had time to think about this I am wondering how much did she value my friendship after all to not so much as listen to 3-4 months of really good advice. I know people have to be ready for taking steps towards improving their life/work etc but to be so foolish as to not listen to a jot of what I was saying was making me feel the friendship was getting more and more pointless as it was only endlessly negative.
Also wouldn't she have just accepted the friendship on the basis of texts only until she got less demanding and such a strain. I have my 15 year old teenage boy to bring up without family support and in limited health and limited means. I am up against enough as it is.
If I value a friendship I try to hold on to it that is all I am saying. Although to be honest I had had enough of her muddle confusion and stress by that stage. There is only so much a person can cope with. She has other friends to talk to so perhaps I am just one of several sounding boards for her long life of drama queen and negativity. I won't ever really know what was in her mind but what does anybody think? It isn't as if I want the friendship back as I can't see her changing. She will only do this again in the future as she is quite brazen and insensitive. I would just like to know what views other may have on the matter so I can get an angle on people like that in the future? It was very much a friendship where I was helping and she was taking throughout. She also told me a number of lies which came to light slowly (too boring to go into).
It has put me off people but then I am feeling that way during this lockdown nightmare with ds affected by no school. This severing of the friendship was before lockdown and it has done me the world of good to step away. It is just I would like new friends who get self-employment in the future ....?