Can you learn to be a morning person?

[TitsalinaBumSquash]

I'm utterly fed up of waking up in the chaos of my kids and husband all being busy.
I'm traditionally not a morning person, I'm known to be a bit grumpy of a morning unless plied with coffee.

I don't want to start my days like this anymore so I'm considering setting my alarm a bit earlier everyday until I'm up early to allow me time to myself to relax and have my coffee in peace and quiet.

So has anyone learned to do this? Learned to love mornings? Is it possible or am I setting myself up to fail?

Yes! I never would have believed it but I've done it! I am absolutely a night owl and my natural sleeping pattern would probably be 2/3am - 10am. I've found routine is the absolute key. I go to bed about 10pm every night and without fail I'm awake at 6am. My husband thankfully is a morning person and wakes up naturally then and brings me a coffee. I'm much less inclined to go back to sleep if I've got a hot coffee. You do have to stick to the routine though every day. I have and it's wonderful.

I read it as 'moaning' ha!
My tip is go to bed earlier, get up earlier, no moaning x

As part of an exercise regimen I went to bed every day at 10:30 (lights out earlier, maybe from 9? I can't remember) for a month and I felt great every morning. It isn't sustainable for me, I'm naturally a night owl. Give it a try but you might need to get more sleep as well as getting up earlier.

Definitely. I was never a morning person before I had children. I am more of a morning person than a night person now though. I go to bed about 10 and then I’m ready for the day from 5/6am onwards! I find it’s better to just get straight out of bed rather than lie around dozing as that always makes me feel more tired!

I’m naturally a night owl. I’ll always be able to find something else to watch or read, to put off going to bed. I have to be up at a certain time for work though, which means I have to be very strict with myself at night and go to bed at 10:30/11 at the latest. I think you can retrain yourself, to an extent but it doesn’t come naturally.

I try to get up a half hour before them for cup of sugary tea to prepare me, then I allow them tv for an hour while on lockdown.
This morning I didn't drop off until 5am DP got me up when he was leaving at 8.30am I was like a cranky bull. DC don't sleep until late they don't get to lie in or they'd never sleep

My dh is in the process of learning to be a morning person. I never was but I breastfed dd as well as working unsociable hours to fit around dh's work so I've had 3 years to get used to being a morning person.

Dh is so grumpy in the morning, he has ruined everyone else's day with the first sentence out of his mouth countless times. It's come to a head now because I'm working more and he's furloughed yet he's spent the whole of lockdown being a miserable shite in the morning and/or refusing to get up until he's decided it's not too early. I told him I'm sick of it, he's going to stop ignoring me and dd, he's going to act happy to see us even if it's what he thinks is "too early", suck it up and be a parent. It's day 4, going well so far and it's made such a positive difference to all of us. The more you get up early, the more you'll feel tired early enough to go to sleep earlier, then getting up early will be easier.

Go to bed earlier, and you'll be ok to wake up earlier. Sounds like a good plan, to have a good start to the day and a bit of time to yourself.

Yes and no. It’s got easier as I’ve got older, but although I go to bed early, I still find mornings really hard. I feel my days are a bit ‘stunted’ because I’m not massively productive in the mornings, but when I get a second wind in the evening it’s time to go to bed. I need a lot of sleep though.

I’d love to be. I try going to bed earlier but I just don’t sleep.

I’d love to sleep from 10-6 but it just doesn’t happen. Even if I get up early.

I seem to get my best sleep between about 5-7.30am. Probably as I’ve been tossing and turning all night. I don’t feel I can miss out on that block though.

I am sort of learning it but entirely accidentally. I don’t really get how but I’m waking up naturally earlier. I’m not great at consistently making the most of it though. Not yet. I think the keys to that for me will be:

1. Getting as much organised the night before (I have nicked the phrase “future friend” for this :o as in, by doing it the night before I am being kinder to my tired morning self!) - stuff like choosing clothes for the day (and for the toddler too), packing bags, getting a wash ready to switch on etc
2. NOT going straight on my phone/iPad and getting caught up in all the apps I use. I’ve deleted FB for a bit anyway (just the app not my account), but also I’m trying not to get sucked into the games I like (I’m a puzzle nerd), and use them as incentives to get stuff done. Eg “ok once I’ve got up and sorted X then I can play Y”.

It’s all stuff that is probably completely obvious to many/most but it’s taken me 30+ years and an ADHD diagnosis to accept I have issues in this area :o

Self confessed sloth here, I did learn too become a morning person as my job required it. I then got out of the relationship I was in and started staying up very late and drinking etc and I got out of getting up and feeling good about it and struggled to get out of bed and I still struggle to get up early even 2 years later (my jobs the same I just struggle to initially get up and wake up properly now) hoping it’ll come back with some persistence ! But lockdown has ruined my sleep pattern again now!

I wish you'd posted this first thing so I could say "no, now piss off I'm going back to sleep"

I agree with what LaneBoy says. It really helps to get organised the night before and then have a good wind down routine.

I get my stuff ready for the next day. Check my phone, deal with anything then leave it out of sight. I go to bed and read a book in dimmed light and put some lavender on my pillow. When I start to feel sleepy I put some ear plugs in and go to sleep.

What’s your caffeine and chocolate intake like OP? I no longer have caffeine or chocolate after 2pm.

I used to be someone who would sleep until 2pm if I could. Then I had a child who has autism and learning disabilities and wakes up every single day at 5.30am and twice during the night at times (he’s now 8) and you do honestly learn to just adapt. I now regularly wake up before my alarm on the very rare times he sleeps in!

Loads of replies! Great. It sounds doable.

@TazSyd - I live off of far too much coffee I'm afraid, not much chocolate though. I do need to drink much more water and less caffeine.

My sleep cycle is crap tbh, I go through phases (like now) if falling asleep about 4am then the kids come in at 7.30 ish and I'm grumpy as hell! (We sleep in the living room for now so I can't even make them leave my bedroom)

I don't want to be that person that says "I'm not a morning person therefore I can be an arse and it's fine." I'm not aiming for being full of the joys of spring every morning but someone who is awake and willing to talk when the kids wakes up would be nice.

Anyway, must try and get some sleep. Thanks!

Ha! Despite my pre sleep wind down routine, I am not full of the joys of spring when I wake up at 7. I still need a strong coffee to function .

It really is worth getting everything ready for the next day, before bed. It means you aren’t lying in bed thinking “oh, I must remember x, y and z in the morning”.

This thread gives me so much hope. I’m not a morning person never have been, I get much more energy of a night and i find it hard to function properly until late afternoon.

As I have my own business and work from home I have always found it hard to get up like I would when i used to commute and that required a lot of effort. I was just considering bringing my work to bed (such a bad habit) but instead I think I’ll try and go to sleep earlier than usual.

I'm a night owl. I need a nice, non challenging breakfast (muesli or low sugar granola and a banana), in the morning, washed down by a lot of strong coffee, in order to be vaguely human and form a coherent thought.I can do 6am wake ups, when I need to but I struggle to do the pre-11pm bedtimes to match because my body clock does not work like that, even when I'm really tired.

That strong coffee is usually my only caffeine of the day, btw. I can't drink caffeine after noon or, even with medication that makes me drowsy, I am either tossing and turning until 4am of falling asleep by 1am (my current average) but waking up for a piss at 3am.

True night owl here, I've found I can do early mornings if I have to - now for clients, previously for jobs and/or stupidly long commutes.

But going to sleep before about 2am feels like a fight with myself no matter what time I'm getting up, and I'm miserable and grumpy on less than nine hours a night.

Self employment has been my saviour, and I'd love to know if you do manage to train yourself to mornings!

@PickAChew

but waking up for a piss at 3am.

Have you spoken to your GP about this? My friend used to wake up every two hours for a piss and it turned out she had something wrong with her kidneys. She’s fine after treatment but it might be worth asking your GP.

I am a morning person but my husband wasn’t. He used to rock up after 9 most days to his job and almost got fired a number of times. Now he has his own business so it’s part personal motivation but he tends to get up and out for 6am most days. He did the 66 day challenge ( takes that long to form a habit apparently) and hasn’t looked back.

I have woken up at 6 since I started this thread,

Some things I have realised,

1. When the alarm goes off I have to actually leave the bed, there and then otherwise it's too easy to go back to sleep.

1. Having the teabag in the mug and the kettle full the night before makes a difference. Ditto having my dressing gown and slippers by the bed ready for me.

1. Sitting by the open front door is nice, even when it's cold and raining outside, the fresh air does me wonders. (I sit inside the open door so I stay dry and my dressing gown, slippers and cuppa keep me warm.

1. Despite how much I love my sleep and would dearly love to sleep in until late, having the hour to myself to bask in the silence and just be alone makes such a positive difference to my morning.

I will keep it up.