Dear all, first post, so be gentle.
My 13 yo daughter has developed body issues which are getting out of control. It started innocently enough: around 11 she decided she wanted a flatter tum, and we discussed a series of exercises to tone it up - she was doing them religiously for about a year and a half. At the same time she cut out sugars, stopped eating cakes and biscuits completely - once again, what's not to like. Gradually however, she started cutting portions, especially at school (a typical lunch was a salad and several grapes), but I wasn't too worried because she ate OK at home (I made sure she had nutritious meals). Then preoccupation with the body shape became incessant, and talk about it non-stop: mainly "I want to be thin", "I want to have flat belly", then it became "I hate myself", pinching, scratching the tummy, full-blown hysterics, screaming, etc. We've been very patient, we discuss everything from how the body and brain work, the right diet, the right attitude, etc. - and we are on a downward spiral.
I took her to GP - by stealth, really, because she was adamant there was nothing wrong. GP weighed her, looked at her - she's not anorexic, so she said the only thing would be psychotherapy. I have two problems with this route: a) DD refuses to even consider that, and b) I have a sneaky suspicion she might end up with a 'mental health' label, and I really don't know what that can ensue in future. Any advice would be greately appreciated.
- Any experience in dealing with body issues which are getting extreme?
- What is the trajectory when you take a kid to a psychoterapist/CBT - any black mark in the medical records?
- How can I talk her into talking to someone?
It's affecting us big time. With teenage outbursts and occasional incontinence thrown in for good measure, I am on the brink of a break-down.
Hope to hear from you!