Not wanting to be pregnant anymore, is this normal?

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Hi, I feel so guilty for posting but I just think I'll have to get it off my chest

I had my 12 week scan with DC2 on Friday. I hadn't been feeling any time of relief or happiness towards the pregnancy, just disappointment and regret. However DH assured me I would once the scan happened. I agreed and told myself that I would.

But I just don't. I don't want it I felt so happy seeing DC1 on the scans. It was lovely. But I could only think negatively this time and looked at the scan and thought 'just get out'. Awful awful, I know.

If anything I feel even more sure I don't want this baby now. I have told DH, he thought I'd come round after the scan. He is shocked that I really hadn't and says maybe the 20 week scan will be better? I want to scream. It's the actual baby, not the scan.

I'm having some counselling over the phone with Marie stopes next week. Is it normal to feel this way? Or will I always not want this?

Was it a planned or unexpected pregnancy?

It was unplanned but not unexpected. I came off of hormonal contraception because of side effects. It was just too much. We had a slip up, but I did get EllaOne. Didn't help. Here we are

If you don’t want to continue the pregnancy you don’t have to. But if you would like to be able to deal with these feelings you could ask for a referral to the specialist mental health midwives, depression happens in pregnancy as well as afterwards and it might help to talk through your feelings. But of course the longer you go the more difficult it will be to terminate.

I can't know how you feel.

I planned DS2 and wanted him for ages. However from my first moment of realising I was pregnant I felt miserable, depressed, dread... honestly it was hard. It was pregnancy depression, hormonal. Once he arrrived I felt fine.

Take some time to think.

We also had a slip up 2 years ago when our daughter was 3 yrs old. Another child was just not what we wanted for many reasons. It was just an absolute nightmare. There were no happy feelings, I just cried all the time and willed myself to have a miscarriage. Awful I know.

Anyway I opted to have a termination as I just couldn't go through with it. What I'm trying to say is please don't feel like you have to continue if it's really not what you want. Don't feel like you have to have another baby because you already have one or that it's what people expect of you.