Lockdown. How easy has it been for you. Or hasn't it?

[Shosha1]

Just watching TV and guest on a show was saying that lockdown has been easy for them.

BUT they lived in a big house in the country. Lots of personal outside space, and no apparent immediate financial worries.

But that is not how most of us live.

We are lucky, only DH and I at home, and although I'm on shielding list, I do live in a tiny hamlet in Wiltshire with a huge garden. DH is in a secure job. I'm retired with PIP, so our finances are fine.

But I keep thinking about a single mum living in a 15th floor flat. How the hell does she cope?

Do you live in a place like myself, or are you one of the ones really struggling.

If you are, you have my great admiration. I was a single Mum for a long time and csnt imagine not being able to see my parents, without them I would not have managed.

Bit rambling, but really where do you live? How much is it affecting how lockdown is for you? .

We have a three storey house with outside space, we are financially secure and no young children.

Yet I'm struggling mentally, not really coping at all, constantly anxious and desperate to go back to work despite being high risk.

I think I'm truly hitting the wall but I really do understand others will and are worse off than me.

I’m furloughed, financially comfortable and I live in a semi-rural area on the edge of a village. DP was working PT, but now back working FT. No kids.

Lockdown has been uneventful but otherwise perfectly tolerable for me. I go for a long walk every day, and I’m enjoying cooking more that I have for years. I am in a very fortunate position, in that I can just sit this nightmare out, which is exactly what I intend to do. I am also very conscious of the fact that others are less lucky.

My main concern is the significant possibility that I may not have a job when this is over. We will cross that bridge if & when we come to it.

I've been finding it totally fine until last week. Mentally I've definitely hit a wall. The last few days I've hated being a parent and just want to avoid everyone in my house!

@Thighmageddon, I am usually the sort of person who just gets on with it. But I had quite a wobble last week. I have a lovely friend at 30, half my age, but we have a wonderful relationship. She has been locked down, with kids at home and both her and her DH working from home.
I texted her, she got in the car ( only the next hamlet over) and coming through the back gate sat 6 feet from me and just talked to me. First person apart from DH since 17th March, in fact she was the last person I saw.

It hasn't been hard for me, I've been wfh with a fairly light workload, we have a nice garden and DC are late teens so I've had no schoolwork to monitor.

I'm still beyond furious that our lives have been put in limbo and we're now being told it was all optional.

I'm finding it ok. We both have our jobs and we have some savings. The kids are well behaved and we have a nice garden.

I appreciate how lucky we are, it would be tough if you were in a flat with kids who don't play quietly alone whilst worrying about work or money.

It turns out, I have preferred it and am now really worried about life going back to normal. I’ve been furloughed from one job but still doing my self employed work - I love my work and want to go back to it, but I also want to make changes to our lives so we aren’t so rushed all the time. More working from home, less after school clubs (Ds was at school 6 days a week 8-6.30pm) and just a more balanced home life I guess. I feel bad that people have struggled so much, but for me and my home it’s been a learning curve as to what really matters and what I really don’t want to go back to when we start up again.

(I’m a single parent in a 3 bed semi with a small but lovely garden though - as others, I csnt imagine how claustrophobic it would have felt in a flat with no outside space)

I’m finding it ok, 3 bed house, smallish garden, OH furloughed, we live with my nan she is shielding, managed to get kids chrome books on 19th March which has made school work much easier. We’ve done all what we can in the house. We go for walks, exercise etc. Miss my other Nan though. Just hope my OH isn’t made redundant as he company has announced a reset plan. I work in a school but because of Nan myself or youngest DD aren’t allowed back in, he won’t let us. We just take each day and hope we will be ok, lost money on our holiday, wedding and 3 weeks before lockdown paid for my wedding dress in full so hoping the shop re-opens. But could be worse

Well I am still working so not locked down as such. Missing friends of course but ok. Keep thinking I need such and such from x shop (closed of course) but never mind. Happier now i have dyed my hair!

I am much happier that the idiot who shared a flat has gone.

Been entertained by my brothers list of what went well/went bad during lock down

He is still working which is good, his son is now potty trained, his baking not so good!

I’m going it ok. I’m working as is DH so no change to time at home although work is very stressful. Adult Dd1 is working from home, DD2 is a student and struggling a bit with being isolated from friends and her BF. But.. I have to admit I’m struggling with both DD being in the house constantly. I love time alone and really struggling with this and feeling incredibly guilty when people are living alone. I’m shopping for my mum so see her weekly from the top of her drive. I really can’t imagine not having outside space and my heart really goes out to those stuck inside day in day out.

Not great. I"ve always struggled with depression & anxiety but put alot of work into managing it through helpful routines etc and was doing really well, especially as the youngest DC was in school from Sept. I even came off anti-depressants completely in the summer. Now I'm really going backwards. DH is currently WFH but he loves his social work-related job, is worried about the people he is in contact with & desperate to get back to 'normal'. The DC are coping brilliantly but they miss life. DS is sooo excited about seeing his friends again at school from the 8th (thank God his school is opening pretty normally).

It’s been ok, the thing I’ve found most challenging is our adolescent dog! DH is a keyworker so he’s been very busy, not seen much of him at all. Homeschooling’s been ok. I’ve had days where I’ve felt like the walls were closing in on me and it’s made me long for a huge private garden but I’m lucky in many ways.

Work for nhs full time so have been working from home as has husband with three children in primary school who need help with homework.

It's been very very long days. I'm exhausted, the house is a mess. My kids have spent way too much time on screens.

But I don't actually mind, we are lucky that we see both sets on parents on a weekly basis as live close by so drop off food and any baking. I have a house with a garden and live near a small river walk and park (not that we have time to go out more than 2/3 times a week)

I am so lucky my kids are amazing and well behaved so we can get on with work.

Usually I have a need to be out doing things and stuff with the family every weekend but I have enjoyed watching films with the kids, trying out new recipes, and having a lie in. Normally I have Pilates at 8.30 on Saturdays and church on Sundays so I never sleep in. But these weekends I have stayed in bed until 9.30 / 10 which is amazing.

We normally spend a lot of time as a small family unit and that has not changed and dare I say it, I don't mind not having to see out siblings and the duty meet ups 🤣

Mixed. We’ve got a decent sized house and a garden. Three primary aged kids (11,10 and 7) but the 10 and 7 year old have Sen and the 7 year old especially has very complex needs. Both of us work, me PT and dh FT. But life hasn’t changed too much. It feels like the summer holidays. Our 7 year old struggles with going out so we spend a lot of time at home and the children with Sen have been in and out of education. I’ve not been out much and I’ve noticed I do feel much more edgy going out but I’ve always felt this to some degree as I’m aware my youngest two children will always need parental support because of their disabilities. But the virus has added another layer to my worries that something may happen to me.

One positive thing is that its helped me really appreciate my 'normality'. I had no idea how much I actually liked my life till it was abruptly curtailed. I think there's a really interesting divide between people like me & people who've really realised quite how unhappy or stressed they were before.

Really difficult, but that's because I've gone from caring for an elderly relative 5 days a week to 7. I really needed that time off.

Not too bad.
I'm lucky to still be working full time, although it's a nursing home and that comes with it's own worries at a time like this.
DH is also a key worker, full time. So we're both seeing other people and not just each other (no kids). I guess that helps keep us sane. We have a garden, not a grass one, but it's big enough for us to both be on sun loungers and have a table/chairs/umbrella/barbecue. So that's helpful.

We were ttc via IVF though, so obvs that's all stopped for a while.

I'm not loving being unable to go to local walks that I'd normally go on, for fear of "locals" kicking off. When in actual fact, the nearest houses to these places are about a mile and a half away, so nobody is really that close to them. I live about 10mins from one by car, but still people moan.

Also not loving standing in queues with people who way over estimate 2m to about 5m and give you the death stare for being less than that, but are happy to walk across your path the minute you're in the shop 🤨

I'm a single parent to two primary aged DC. No contact with their father.
I'm a nurse and I work Monday- Friday so the children are attending keyworker childcare provision at school. We have a 3 bed terrace with a small garden in a village.
Up until now things have ticked along ok to be honest, I've actually had more money as we haven't been out spending anything so have been able to pay off credit card etc which is actually a huge relief going forward.
From 1st June though when schools open up to other year groups the hours they are going to be open will reduce as they are going to be unable to provide breakfast or after school clubs and will close at lunch mid week for cleaning. This will obviously have a huge impact on my ability to work so I'm quite anxious about this and not really sure what my contingency plan is!

I WFH anyway, so the work situation is much the same, albeit I'm not getting as much work in, as much of it is wedding based.

The biggest change for me has been the DCs being off school/work - dealing with their boredom and frustration has been the hardest part emotionally - DS suffers with anxiety and ended up on ADs last year when his work situation was unstable. I was dreading the same happening again, but he's coped remarkably well - helped by the fact that his company found a way to furlough him even though he's on a zero hour contract, so is getting a lot less than he would've earned (Easter would normally be peak season for overtime, but he was paid as if it were the previous few weeks when the season was only just starting).

The younger DCs have been very self-motivated with school work so I haven't had to do much for them to be fair, but the cries of "what can I have to eat?!" every ten minutes are wearing thing. I gave up with packed lunches many years ago, relying on school dinners to save me the hassle of having to think about lunches. Having them all here for 3 meals a day is a total ball ache.

And just having people around all the time is weird for me, I'm used to total silence for much of the day!

I don't live with my DP so that was hard for the first few weeks, but when it became apparent that we might not see each other until September, we decided to meet up once a week anyway. The DCs are not able to see their dad at the moment as he's stuck abroad, so I figured seeing their 'step-dad' was no more risky in terms of spreading germs than if they'd been able to see their dad.

Apart from my random Amazon binges and LOTS of food, my outgoings have been pretty modest. Ironically, this crisis could be the thing that helps me get back on my feet financially!

Mental health-wise, I was never one for meeting up with lots of people, but I also hate Zoom etc so am feeling quite isolated. I don't speak to anyone but my DCs most days. Text DP a bit and occasionally Facetime, but I don't really like it. The idea of going to Costa with a friend, or popping round someone's house for a cup of tea is now very exciting

I'm very aware that I'm lucky to have a garden, I'm in a city but surrounded by lovely lakes and walks. I really feel for those who don't have that, and don't blame some of them one bit for flocking to the coast or other sites of natural beauty for a day of relaxation to get away from normal life.

I was terrified at one point that we'd end up with a Spanish/Italian style lockdown where we had to stay inside with no exemption for exercise etc needing a document to allow us out once a day. I can only imagine how awful that would be for someone without a garden or any access to outside space. I really wish people were more tolerant of other people's situations at the moment.

We have decent outside space and live in a nice area perfect for walking, cycling, woodland and countryside walks with a large supermarket a few
minutes walk away but I’m at home with 4 bickering DC aged from 23 to 9 (one with ASD and LD’s, prone to outbursts) while DH is still working long hours as a keyworker. Trying to ensure they are all coping mentally, getting out for exercise and fresh air and not getting on each other’s nerves is very draining but I think I’ve coped pretty well. Oldest DC is furloughed from a big new job she only started late last year fresh from Uni and is terrified she’ll be laid off so trying to keep her calm. On the upside she has started coming on bike rides after refusing to get on one since she turned about 12!

I’ve also built up my daily jog/walk from 2.5km to 10km, I would never have started jogging if the gyms hadn’t closed, legs are shaping up nicely and really helps my MH. We’re doing more home baking as a family, pizzas, cookies, brownies which is nice and middle two teen DC are joining in playing board games which there’s no way they’d do before.

I used to do a daily food shop as I hated spending hours going round the supermarket for a big shop but I am finding it better now I am doing a twice weekly shop (still less time than a weekly shop) and it’s so nice to have days where I don’t need to shop or think what to have for dinner as it’s already bought. Forced me to meal plan too which makes things easier.

I’m thankful we live where we do and don’t have babies or toddlers anymore!

In some ways it’s been easy, we have detached house with plenty of space. A garden, no imminent money worries. Jobs are reasonably secure. Although I suspect there will be redundancies in med-long term.

On the other hand home schooling + preschooler + 2 full time wfh jobs has been harder than I ever imagined

This is why I feel so guilty. We don’t have financial worries. In fact, apart from food, we’ve spent little over the last three months. When lockdown started I was desperate. It’s definitely put my mental health back to a place I didn’t want to go to again.

Maybe we’re just getting used to it now, but I still don’t like it and worry that I won’t want to go out if and when we can. I worry that I won’t see my children and grandchildren in person again.

A mixed bag for us.
I work clinically in NHS. There was corporate bullying at the beginning when there was a panic and the protection of staff has been pretty awful, with lots of lip service but no real care. Lost 2 colleagues to covid and a handful or so were so ill they needed ITU. We had loads of elderly admitted because they totally ignored social distancing and shielding advice in the early weeks.
DH needs to also travel to work. We commute and the tubes were infrequent and packed, that’s only improved this last week.
DD is year 10 and bright, her education has been totally fucked and the poor sod is on her own most days. It’s been hard watching her (popular, sociable) being so alone. I’m furious about the school situation and the unnecessary sacrifices young people have been forced to make.
On the up side we’ve had nice days together, it’s not been the usual rushing around at weekends, we have a garden and discovered some lovely evening walks that we’ll continue when all this finishes.

Its been ok, a mixed bag really. I am a lone parent with an 8 year old and wfh so that has been tough going as DD is stubborn and a reluctant learner. On the plus side I have actually enjoyed wfh and I've already asked if its possible for me to wfh one day a week when things go back to some kind of normal.

We are lucky to live in a semi rural area so lots of good walks nearby and we have a reasonable sized garden. We are lucky enough to live next to a meadow but unfortunately the lockdown has brought out some bored teenagers who have decided to grafitti my back fence and think the alley at the back of my house which leads to the meadow is a great place to hang out in.