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How to help (over) sensitive Y7 DS with friendship strife

1 reply

cheeseismydownfall · 19/05/2020 19:18

DS(12) is fun and good natured, but ever since playschool he has always been sensitive and is often quick to take offence or to feel 'wronged'. DH and I have tried addressing this in various ways over the years, but it is very much who he is and I really don't think he realises that sometimes he overreacts. For context, none of his teachers have ever mentioned it, so I don't think it is a really serious problem. But I do think it creates issues with his friendships at times - he makes friends easily, but they often fade quite quickly and I think this behaviour may have something to do with it.

He's just told me that he has fallen out with his closest friend while they were playing online this afternoon - apparently his friend was teasing him and wouldn't stop, and DS ended up quiting the game.

What I'm struggling with is how to respond to him in this kind of situation. On the one hand, I want him to feel that I have his back, and the last thing I would want to do is give him the message that he has to put up with people being mean to him. But on the other hand, I know that he finds it hard to take a joke, and I'm worried that he will lose friends if he falls out with them this easily. I didn't overhear what happened, so I don't know for sure.

Has anyone else dealt successfully with this kind of situation? I don't mean this specific falling-out - hopefully that will resolve itself - but more generally, in terms of walking a line between sympathising with/validating their feelings, but nudging them towards rethinking their own reactions too?

OP posts:
missyB1 · 19/05/2020 19:31

To be honest they all argue now and again - thats kids! If he just quit the game it's not a big deal, if he called his friend all sorts and acted like a drama queen well that's different. So I think it depends on how he reacts when he's upset if you see what I mean?
What happens at home if he falls out with a member of the family?

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