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Original poster

Early autism signs or late developer / personality?

66 replies

Lou0712 · 16/05/2020 19:21

Eye contact is very much on his terms. Sometimes he will give me a fleeting glance & smile then look away, sometimes post-feed I can get a lot & other times he will turn his head to look everywhere but at me!
the hand twirling - he does it a lot like he’s conducting an orchestra
he doesn’t enjoy peekaboo....in fact other than me making funny noises at him or tickling him, he gets the most enjoyment out of solo play (he does bash toys together, plays in a normal way and mouths them etc). He’s quite happy being left to play & doesn’t cry when I leave the room or look for me. He also has no stranger danger & doesn’t always greet me with a smile when I’ve been out for a while
sometimes he’ll look where I point & when I call his name, other times he’s too fixated in something else.
he doesn’t babble. He can say ga, boo, huh but never together ie gaga & he doesn’t do it socially, just to himself & not much. He makes a noise blowing out of his nose like an elephant instead haha
doesn’t mimic faces or sounds. He does sometimes frown if I do & then smiles when I do but not always.

He does respond to noises, looks for the cat when I ask where he is, rolls both ways, loves standing aided, reaches for toys, loves his food & can drink from his sippy cup....hasn’t attempted crawling but he seems to be pretty on track with physical stuff it’s just the social side I’m worried about. It’s hard with it being lockdown! He does smile at my mum on FaceTime & he smiled at 2 strangers today on a walk...generally he is fairly easy to get a smile out of!
He communicates to me when he wants something by making a frustrated sound but hasn’t grasped that he should look at me if he wants something.

Does any of this stuff sound like normal perhaps slightly quirky baby behaviour or is he ticking a lot of autism boxes? I know he is young but they diagnose it much earlier in America and I’ve heard you can do early intervention so I’d love to know if I’m just panicking for no reason or should perhaps see someone....

Any advice would be great. I know I should just enjoy him but I just really want to give him the best chances in life & if that means worrying but getting early intervention I will deal with the stress!

Thanks

OP posts:

Original poster

Lou0712 · 20/05/2020 10:41

To be honest I never see the NCT girls for this Exact reason!
Some of my friends have been lucky with great groups where they are all really honest & supportive but mine is just a constant competition which I don’t partake in.
If someone sends a photo of their baby sitting, another will send a photo of theirs crawling.
When one of the girls did confess to struggling I was the ONLY person who replied to offer support and share my bad experience. Think I am just unlucky with the group I ended up in! Although it does sound like a common problem by the sound of your replies....sad isn’t it.
The people on mumsnet as a whole seem much more honest & helpful!

OP posts:

Gimmecaffeine · 20/05/2020 10:56

I'd definitely stop googling and looking for reassurance. It's tough, but for over a year there is just no way to tell one way or another. I don't think anything you have described sounds unusual, but you can raise it with your HV at the 12 month check.

As severe ASD is in my family I really understand the anxiety, but all we can do is enjoy our babies and know that whatever happens it will be ok. Perhaps not always what we expected, but still ok.

ttrrii · 11/09/2021 21:47

@Lou0712
How are things now?

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80Dodgeballs · 11/09/2021 21:53

As a parent of two autistic kids, I would say it's too early to tell. Not much of what you've said would concern me.

Original poster

Lou0712 · 12/09/2021 07:49

Hi @ttrrii
He is 2 this month so I’ll know more when he has his check but the HV came to meet my newborn recently & said he is behind with his speech but I have no other concerns now.
He has a lot of words, he just can’t say them all clearly & doesn’t put more than one together but he is very good at communicating & understands everything we say & instructions.
I think like everyone said, children just do things in their own time often.
Will update if anything is flagged that I’m missing in his 2 year check!

OP posts:

Ozanj · 12/09/2021 07:52

@Lou0712

I’m worried about my son.... Someone I know who has an autistic child commented that he twirls his hands like her son did & since they said that I cannot stop googling & seeing signs! He is almost 8 months old & is a very happy boy but the following concern me : 1) Eye contact is very much on his terms. Sometimes he will give me a fleeting glance & smile then look away, sometimes post-feed I can get a lot & other times he will turn his head to look everywhere but at me! 2) the hand twirling - he does it a lot like he’s conducting an orchestra 3) he doesn’t enjoy peekaboo....in fact other than me making funny noises at him or tickling him, he gets the most enjoyment out of solo play (he does bash toys together, plays in a normal way and mouths them etc). He’s quite happy being left to play & doesn’t cry when I leave the room or look for me. He also has no stranger danger & doesn’t always greet me with a smile when I’ve been out for a while 4) sometimes he’ll look where I point & when I call his name, other times he’s too fixated in something else. 5) he doesn’t babble. He can say ga, boo, huh but never together ie gaga & he doesn’t do it socially, just to himself & not much. He makes a noise blowing out of his nose like an elephant instead haha 6) doesn’t mimic faces or sounds. He does sometimes frown if I do & then smiles when I do but not always.

Thanks

The fact that he’s responding to you already makes autism very unlikely.

I feel for your friend but her ‘diagnosing’ other kids is very unhelpful. Try and reduce contact or don’t take your DS with you when you visit her.

ttrrii · 12/09/2021 09:50

@Lou0712
Nice to hear that you are not worried anymore :)

Do you remeber when did your child start babbling and pointing? My ten months old is developing rather slowly - not sitting, commando crawling only. No pointing, waving, babbling, but responds to name almost every time, even when focusing on something else. He also does not like to look at strangers- he looks, smiles/giggles and then looks away. When someone vomes to visit,then it takes him 30 minutes before he is okay to look at someone for longer time. He also does not follow my point. I’m super worried, cause my DD1 was already pointing and babbling this age :(

ttrrii · 12/09/2021 09:52

Oh and when i say “pat-pat”, he will pat and also is imitating when i pat at something.

Original poster

Lou0712 · 12/09/2021 10:26

@ttrrii completely understand your worries. He started pointing around 11 months but not consistently. Babbling was around then too but he couldn’t even say mama until a couple of months ago! It was just dada constantly. I was really worried about it until I started going to baby groups and noticing that whilst he was definitely behind on the communication side of things (he never even went through the pointing at stuff he wants phase), he was more advanced in other areas! So I realised quickly he was just developing other aspects and it was the same with other children there…Some more like him and others couldn’t do what he could.
Now he waves and points and babbles and everything I was worried about so I would say try to not worry for now and give it a few months. Also, don’t worry when you have the one year check, they told me I might need to go to speech therapy as he was behind but literally a couple of months later he was doing all the things they were concerned about.
The HV even said to me the other day that he was a bit behind so she was delaying his 2 year check as she thought he’d be ticking boxes in a few months.
Great yours imitates the pat pat. My son never imitated! And like I said I have zero concerns now!

OP posts:

ttrrii · 12/09/2021 10:56

@Lou0712
Thank you so much! Did your little one liked cuddles? Mine does not. He likes to be held facing forwards, but not cuddled unless he is on the bed and i’m tickeling him.

Original poster

Lou0712 · 12/09/2021 12:18

@ttrrii He likes being cuddled up drinking his milk or watching tv but I can’t remember when that started. He’s certainly never been a cuddly boy who actively comes for hugs unless hurt etc.
It must be hard comparing with your firstborn but I think they’ve all just got different personalities and development rates. I wish I’d relaxed more last year and just enjoyed my little boy because even if he was autistic, I think it would
Have been much too early to tell anyway like the other posters who reassured me stated. It’s probably still too early now too but I’m just trying to relax & not google things!
Do your very best to not worry, keep pointing & waving etc and then if he’s still not doing any of these things by 18 months, speak to your GP. Feel free to ask anything though, I know how worrying it can be

OP posts:

ttrrii · 19/09/2021 14:13

@Lou0712
Thank you again!
But how did your little one act around strangers? I find that “smiling and looking away” really odd. He did not do that until 7-8 months old. But now he does it basicly everybody but me. How was your little one engaging when you tried to teach/point him something?

Yas1362 · 30/07/2025 14:39

Hi @Lou0712 . Can you please give us an update of your son? Thanks

Yas1362 · 04/10/2025 12:35

@ttrrii hi. How is your son doing now? Would be great to have an update!🙏

Cherry374 · 23/02/2026 13:33

Hi @Lou0712 I know it’s been a while since your post but I wondered how things are for your little boy now? As some of what you posted sounds very similar to my own situation. Thank you. ☺️

Original poster

Lou0712 · 23/02/2026 13:54

Hi everyone.
just to update and potentially reassure everyone who has found this through their own concerns. My son is now at school and doing brilliantly. He did take a while to make friends & socially I think he was behind others despite being the eldest in the year but now he is super chatty & sociable with everyone and makes friends really easily. He is also academically exactly where he should be.
He does have sensory issues with food and is a very sensitive boy who feels deeply. He can suffer with anxiety. But he is also a huge empath, hilarious and very kind.
my daughter who is 4 struggles with loud & busy places & is also super sensitive yet displayed none of the traits that I mentioned above years ago.
I have no idea if either of them are on the spectrum or just sensitive children. But what I have learnt is that you just have to not overanalyse and wait and see! There is nothing you can do when they are so young and if

OP posts:

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