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Original poster

Do you wish you’d stuck at 2 DC?

58 replies

Goostacean · 12/05/2020 21:00

Just that really. Mulling over a third. Do you wish you’d stuck with two? Ignoring the fact that of course everyone loves their children and (I assume!) you’d not want to get rid of them now, that is.

OP posts:
Sevencats · 15/05/2020 14:48

I wish I could have had three or even two. But my body don’t cope with just one. But I think I would truthfully stopped at two.

AnotherBoredOne · 15/05/2020 14:50

No never. 13,12&3

countrylanes · 15/05/2020 14:53

I am glad I stuck at two. Though my age meant a third would have been a decidedly bad idea! They get on so well. And I would have totally lost my shit if I had a third. I don't have the patience for three I think, especially as my eldest is lovely but very hard work. And I only really started to get proper sleep when the youngest was nearly 4. So almost seven years of appalling sleep. I couldn't have added to that.

IdentifyasTired · 15/05/2020 14:53

No way. I have 4 and love it.

Original poster
Goostacean · 15/05/2020 15:00

I’m very aware when DH and I pick one up each, and cuddle them and carry them off to their bath or bed or whatever, that I’m glad we have enough hands for them! Feel like it would be harder with three... (children, not hands).

OP posts:
Topseyt · 15/05/2020 15:06

My three are now aged almost 25, 21 and almost 18.

I never once regretted having three. I knew our family didn't feel totally complete at two so I knew I would have regretted not at least trying for a third.

sunnie1992 · 15/05/2020 15:07

When 3rd was born I had 3 under 5.

The first year was chaos, and the second every got sick on rotation for the entire autumn and winter.

But the youngest is now 3, and it's all settled down. Still hard at times but we are finding a rhythm

JC12345 · 15/05/2020 15:18

We have three (1 plus younger twins) who are 2.4 years apart. Having three is great fun but complicated and more expensive when you need car big enough for 3 car seats, hotel rooms/holidays for 5 and a lot of days out/activities are frequently based on family of 4 so you need extra room etc.

Ginfordinner · 15/05/2020 15:22

Two words - university fees

HabbyHadno · 15/05/2020 15:23

No, I love having three.

HabbyHadno · 15/05/2020 15:26

I've got DS - 6, DS - 2 and DD - 1 last week and it's hard work but they're a right little gang. Number three has been such a gift to us.

ElectricTonight · 15/05/2020 15:28

Love having three 7(daughter) 2(son) and 1yo (son)

The two younger ones are starting to "fight" one another now but I think that's due to them having so much energy and little to do with it in these current circumstances.

Original poster
Goostacean · 15/05/2020 15:35

Oh my gosh. One word: twins... could end up with four?! Got to bear it in mind...

OP posts:
HazelBite · 15/05/2020 15:38

Well my third turned out to be twins, and there were many occasions when I wished we had stopped at two!

Original poster
Goostacean · 15/05/2020 15:53

Did you have any in the family @HazelBite, or was it a total surprise?

OP posts:
cheeseismydownfall · 15/05/2020 16:13

We have three, who are now 12, 9 and 7. They are great friends, great company for each other, and we are so lucky to have them.

The only thing that makes me reflect on our choice (regret isn't the right word) is that we could have afforded independent edification if we had have stuck at two, and the older they get the more I wish it was an option - we just didn't really consider it, which sounds stupid now. It's lucky the elder two adore the youngest or I really would feel guilty!

cheeseismydownfall · 15/05/2020 16:15

Education, not edification obviously, although they would probably benefit from some edification too!

userabcname · 15/05/2020 16:17

Op you're like me! I have a nearly 3yo and 7mo and mulling a third. Personally, my worries are....what if I never stop wanting babies??! I can't keep having them so maybe I should wait a few years and see if the urge goes. Also had a cs 7 months ago and worried about complications in pregnancy/delivery. On the other hand, we are hoping to move in a year or two and it would be helpful to have all the kids we need to account for in terms of bedrooms / space (e.g. if no 3 did turn out to be twins we'd want a 5 bed). Plus maybe we should get all the baby/toddler stuff done so we can de-clutter all those things before moving...we've VERY tentatively pencilled in next year to start ttc (depending on pandemic/financial situation) but part of me thinks we should just start trying this year - October would be fine as a year since the cs. Really undecided!

Scbchl · 15/05/2020 16:31

I always wanted three and have three. I have never wished I'd stopped at three its just not something in have ever thought of. I did have 5 years and then 3 years between each child so never had to deal with a very young toddler or baby with another baby being born. Maybe then it would of been more stressful.

HazelBite · 15/05/2020 16:45

@Goostacean no none in the family, and I was hoping for a daughter after already having two sons (5 and 2) and ended up wiith identical boys.
Fortunately I like football and formula1 but our food bills when they were all teens were eye watering!

Original poster
Goostacean · 15/05/2020 17:27

Gosh we’ve got two boys too... That’s a cautionary tale! But I’m sure they’re a close and happy band of brothers now Smile

OP posts:
GorgeousLadyofWrestling · 15/05/2020 17:27

Never for a second regret my third baby. Is it hard - fuck yes. Is it worth it - absolutely. She completes our family in a way I didn’t even know we were missing until she arrived. They are 3, 5 and 7. They get on wonderfully - their group dynamic plus their individual relationships are so lovely. Of course, they bicker and fight but they love each other fiercely and my favourite thing in the world is listening to them play together. Lockdown has been so much easier for them having each other.

I knew I was done at 3. Each pregnancy was harder and I just never wanted to go through labour again! DH wanted four but what we have is perfect.

Philosoraptor · 15/05/2020 17:49

I had 3 under 18 months at one point. 0/10 do not recommend Grin

RobinsonXmas · 15/05/2020 17:52

I was crazy with hormones and desperately wanted a third. DH (himself, middle one of three) was very sure three was a wrong number. So we stuck at two. The hormones faded after a few months and I'm so pleased we stuck at two.
My friends that had the third find that the novelty wears off each stage by the time the third gets there. So going to school, moving to secondary, etc by the time the third gets to year 6 they can't wait to be out of those primary school worries, their heads have moved on to the elder two at secondary. Both friends I'm thinking of love all their children and find lots of reasons to confirm why they had the third but it's interesting as an observer.

teazle · 15/05/2020 18:18

I love having 3 (17, 14, 12) and have never regretted it. But I will say that my 3rd is a much more difficult character and is very hard work (highly strung, intolerant, bossy) and she winds the other 2 up a lot. She doesn't have good relationships with them and our house would be more harmonious if we had stopped at 2. But I still don't regret it because no matter what you always love them and can't imagine life without them. When she's on good form she brings so much joy.

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