I've become unattracted to my DH but not physically.

[Linale]

Im beginning to find my DH a bit of a turn off, not physically. I still find him physically attractive but it's more the way he is. I feel awful saying this. I'm nothing special myself but I've sort of finding him irritating and everything he does annoys me even though theres no real reason too. It's like all his small flaws are massive. It's not mattered to me before and I know in my head that I'm being unfair but I don't know what the heck is going on. It's like I have a picture of what I want in a partner and he's not it.

Does anyone understand what I'm talking about! I don't know if it's boredom or what. We have been together 14 years and have been through highs and lows.

I understand. When I thought this way (about 10 years ago) I worked on accepting DH the way he was and had always been. I decided the faults were endearing. It was hard work but I realised it was my view/tolerance level that had changed, not him. It worked. We have just celebrated our 30th wedding anniversary and I love and respect him.

The way calls porridge ‘podge’ is still massively hard to accept, though!

I know exactly what you mean.

Dp and I have never had the "on top of eachother " style relationship. Very much both like our own space . Lockdown is unbearable. Neither of us are cut out for this.

There are things about DW that make me grind my teeth. The same is true of me. But she is, and always has been, the only person in the world who has my best interests at heart.

If I start to feel hypercritical, I find it helpful to think about the plank in my own eye, so to speak. I have many terrible habits, countless irritating mannerisms and a few quite serious flaws, which DH overlooks or downplays.

I’ve been feeling this this the past few days. It doesn’t help we had a massive argument last night and he was utterly vile to me.
Objectively he is very handsome and successful where as I just look like a mum despite my best efforts so I do wonder if I should try harder to not let his flaws turn me off so much.

It's definitely a lockdown thing. Spending 24/7 for weeks on end with the same person, no real breaks.

Could be lockdown. Too much of anyone is annoying. I annoy myself

Well I'm glad it's not just me! I didn't think of it being a lockdown thing but i think you guys might be right. I guess this is the longest we've ever been together without even a break from each other.

LuvMyBoyz podge is unforgivable!

I've been feeling this way for a while now too, OP and I had considered leaving over it all but I had nowhere to go and nothing to my name.
Lots of things have built up and it feels like there is no love left.