is 25 too late for a better life?

[LittleLeaps]

I am 25 years old, I have 2 beautiful children, me and my partner rent a small 2 bedroom flat, my partner works full time and I work part time in a low skilled, low paid job that allows me to work around my partners working hours. It doesn't pay much but enough for me to pay some bill's and whatever the children need.

Due to some bad life choices, a serious lack of self confidence, severe anxiety and depression and the fact that I have never known what I wanted to do in life I have found myself with very few useable qualifications (I do have GCSEs at A-B grades, I got Bs at AS level but did not complete the full A level and I do have a level 3 degree in plumbing but I didnt do an apprenticeship and so that's pretty much useless now). I do enjoy learning, and I am lucky in that I do find it quite easy to learn new things. I want to get a job that I am respected in, that I won't be embarrassed to tell people what I do, and that pays a little better than minimum wage. Is 25 too late for me to do something about this? And has anyone got any suggestions as to what sort of job I could do? Or courses I could take?

TooTrueToBeGood Do you mind saying what job you're in?

IT. Currently security and risk management but I've had a variety of different roles over the years. I started off as a 1st line support engineer, after college, and worked my way up.

Even with children you really can do it I know loads of women who retrained once they had kids my friend opened up her own business at 44 . Honestly don't be scared to try anything

We've had very different life situations, as does everyone, but when I was 25 I felt like my life was over. After getting my degree I worked for three years in a dead-end job in a really toxic hospital admin environment. I was in an equally toxic relationship with a narcissistic cokehead who basically used me as a housekeeper/babysitter for his son. I was perpertually broke and miserable. When I was 25 the coke-narc-bellend cheated on me and, when I moved out of my flat for some thinking space, he then moved her in and I found out he'd been cheating on me for 9 months. I had to go into a flatshare and was basically alone in London, all my uni friends having left already and me being too much of a mess to make new ones. I had already decided to give up my job to do another degree but I had no money and had to move back in with my parents, with whom I don't have the best relationship. By the time I was 25 and a half I had no money, friends, home, relationship or job, my self-confidence was shattered, and I was on the way to developing a dependence on alcohol. I was seen by community psychiatric nurses as I just couldn't see an end to the misery.
I'm now in my early 30s. I have a wonderful partner who I am engaged to and we own a home outside London. My job isn't particularly well-paid but I really enjoy it and have made good friends there. I still get low moments (and enjoy a drink!), but I feel now on the whole optimistic about life.
This isn't at all a brag, just an illustration that you can feel stuck at 25, but it doesn't mean you actually are. I feel like a very different person now.

25 is so young! You can do anything!

I went back to college at 26; got my GCSE's and did an access to health professions course - wanted to be a midwife. Then changed my mind and have just been accepted into a social work course starting in September when I'll be 31! Go for it! :-)

When you're on your death bed, that's when it's too late.

It's never too late! At around 25 I made a career change from pharmacy to teaching and am much happier.

I'm 26 now and have a range of friends from early twenties to early thirties. Some are now starting uni, some are finishing uni, some are trying to move up a career, some didn't go to uni and went to work instead, some have amazing jobs and seem to have everything- we're all trying to do better in our own way at our own pace.

Personal progress isn't linear and you are doing so well already by holding down your own job, running a household and having a family. Don't be embarrassed by your job or current life, you are worth more than any perceived status a job gives.

I suggest volunteering with St John Ambulance- I do this and have met so many people from healthcare and other sectors, you'll get so many new experiences and it's really motivating.

You have a good base of qualifications to work from and a great attitude to learning and this is brilliant. I think your youth and potential to do well will be looked on favourably.

I hope this next bit inspires you: I used to know several women from work who were mothers, not necessarily happy with their jobs and made a change to their lives. One lady worked in a hospital dispensary and went on to become a dietician with the same hospital, another was a SAHM and became a dispenser in a community pharmacy and went on to become a nurse, another was a healthcare assistant working on wards and became a nurse, another did pharmacology at uni and then took a break and returned to uni to become an occupational therapist, another who did art and then became an occupational therapist. From St John Ambulance I also met parents who were nurses and made the switch to radiotherapy and vice versa, parents who were studying to become paramedics.

Did you do the apprenticeship for level 2 plumbing?

If you did and had the required GCSEs I would look at retaking the level 3 plumbing as this is now done in partnership with your apprenticeship and you go to college one day per week and work the other 4.

Otherwise I wouldn’t get too hung up on what you deem to be a “respectable” job.
I would look around at things that earn the most money in an area you like.

Just a quick google brought up a website called agencycentral.co.uk that lists the different agencies in your area for the type of work that might interest you in science.

Whether it be F/t work or temping p/t

Temping in different types of jobs I think hones down what exactly you are good at and what you can’t stand doing.

Only when you have a crystal clear idea would I decide to take any other form of qualifications

Dd did a lot of different work when she left school (at 16). She now realises she is great at certain things and has a hatred of doing the same job in the same environment with the same people for weeks on end.

Because of this she is now doing jobs that on paper need a degree and 5 years experience.

She is 19 and has 4 GCSEs

You are still very very young at 25.

Of course it's not too late op. At 23 - just a couple of years' younger than you, I had very little compared to you. I had severe mental health issues, wasn't living independently and couldn't hold down a job - even a very simple one - due to my mental health. I had very little money and no confidence. I was in an awful place.

I completely turned my life around (I won't go into the details of how). I'm now very happy, secure and content. 25 is so young grab life with both hands!

I had a colleague that started studying when she was 40. I'd say 25 is actually really quite young still.

I went back to school aged 30. I did a social sciences access course.
I left my bastard ex and rewrote my life.
Ten years later and I’m really happy.

Is 25 too late for me to do something about this?

No - perfect time to start. Choose something which makes your heart sing and study in the evenings, online - to achieve the qualifications needed

I think I heard someone on the radio saying that all of our gas boilers would need to be replaced soon, so maybe you could start preparing yourself for that? You could maybe be start off as part of the actual installation team and then move onto training?
Or try to skill yourself up in time for the green revolution which is apparently on its way. IF you do decide to go back to college, don't forget to apply for bursaries and any funding that might be available.

At 23 I was in a job with fairly good progression but I hated it and knew it wasnt what I wanted to do for my life. I left and went to study nursing, it took 4 years instead of 3 as had 2 babies during the course but just this week started my first newly qualified post and I finally feel the sense of achievement I've been waiting for.
You have to be a bit more creative when you have kids while studying but I've always found a way to make it work. Most pharmacies will take you on at minimum wage counter assistant level and put you through vocational education training to be a dispensary assistant then eventually a pharmacy technician. If it was me I would seriously consider working in a hospital pharmacy though as once you get to pharmacy tech level you are given a lot of autonomy and responsibility.

Why not aim for being a fully qualified pharmacist via a degree?

Of course it’s not too late. Already having kids is also a benefit as you won’t have to suffer career disruption as a result of having children. Go for it!

By the way @LittleLeapsI mentioned plumbing because it was in your OP and i thought you might want to go back to it. Obviously if you want to be a pharmacist you should go for it. Seize the day!

Never to old to do anything! My mother first went to uni when she was 30 and then again in her 40s.