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Wood to do a job below your capabilities/qualifications if it suited your family life and stress levels

43 replies

Moominmummy12 · 01/05/2020 21:28

Just debating wether to go for promotion because it feels like that’s what I should be doing rather than any particular desire to.

OP posts:
Moominmummy12 · 01/05/2020 22:44

Clearly shouldn’t be typing after wine.
Would you do a job?

OP posts:
SuperSange · 01/05/2020 22:48

I do. I'm qualified at a higher level than I'm working at and have lots of industrial experience, but part time work in the industry is non existent, so I work part time in a much less demanding, but related role. I have a school aged child and I couldn't manage mentally with working full time until he's older.

HolyWells · 01/05/2020 23:01

No. ‘Because it suits our family’ is pretty much Mn code for ‘DH leaves the majority of the childcare and housework to me, and I’m so frazzled I’m wrecking my career rather than point out there are two careers in the family and my role on earth is not to service his’.

7Days · 01/05/2020 23:03

Yup. I do.
Though what HolyWells says gives me pause for thought.
But yeah. I don't want a frantic life, never did.

Cruddles · 01/05/2020 23:05

I'm the husband/dad and I'm taking the lesser job in order to support my family lifestyle and my wife's much better career potential

titchy · 01/05/2020 23:16

I tried it for a year after being made redundant. Was bored shitless and desperate to get back on the career track. So I did.

Netflixprimenow · 01/05/2020 23:23

I'm the higher earner and home and financial security depends on me. I would love to change jobs but it's not an option esp at the minute. But if it was feasible I'd definitely go for a job that was less stressful

thegcatsmother · 02/05/2020 01:31

Having taught, I now want a job that doesn't require me to take it home and do it after hours, and which doesn't eat up most of my weekends. a part time job where I can go in, do the job to the best of my ability, and then go home would suit me just fine.

Redskylark · 02/05/2020 07:53

I would. Me being around for my children is my priority, always has been. I'm a hard worker but dont have aspirations to find roles which would mean having to put work before my family in any situation or stress me out mentally

wildthingsinthenight · 02/05/2020 07:55

I do and it was a great decision.
I ran a day nursery for 10 years now I am a part time school receptionist/secretary

Iwouldbecomplex · 02/05/2020 08:00

I do. I don't have children so could focus on career without any of the associated guilt if I wanted to. I used to work in a very fast paced, long hours, high targets job in London, stressful commute etc. I just wasn't happy and the money / promotions etc didn't make it worth it for me. I live up north now and work in admin. I walk to work and back, my job isn't stressful and I never work longer than contracted hours. When I leave the office I don't give it another thought until I get back there the next day. It's improved my sense of well-being so much and given me head space to enjoy my non-working time.

purplemunkey · 02/05/2020 08:03

I did until DC was at school. I don’t agree with Holy that that’s always the case - wasn’t for me. DH wasn’t keen on me going part time, but I wanted to and knew it could financially work. I took a bit of a step down a level for a few years, spent more time at home with a far less stressful workload and completely left work at the office. I’ve now just secured a promotion back at the level I was. Sure I’m a few years behind where I might’ve been, but I’ve got another 30 working years ahead of me so what’s the rush?

GrumpyMiddleAgedWoman · 02/05/2020 08:05

Yes. I do. I'd never qualify to work in DH's well-paid field (this was the case pre-DC too). I work locally and am absurdly over-qualified for what I do. I love my job, though: when I got it my boss suspected I would get bored and not hang around but I've been there years and plan to stay. It's usually low stress which is important because two high stress jobs in our house would => divorce!

Ragwort · 02/05/2020 08:09

How old are you?

I do now, but I am over 60 and work part time because it suits me. I am no longer interested in promotion or getting up the career ladder but I genuinely think you should do whatever you can to remain financially independent... you see so many stories on here wherE women are trapped in unhappy relationships because of bad financial decisions.

ragged · 02/05/2020 08:09

I have done this.

Incrediblytired · 02/05/2020 08:10

The problem is getting bored and getting irritated by poor decisions made by those senior to you. I moved jobs to work nearer home in a job which is a step down the career ladder. I’m bored and I end up doing more senior work at my paygrade to keep me interested.

I think it would work better in a different industry but in the one I’m qualified to do it’s not ideal. Plus even my admin get stressed about being overloaded so I think there’s stress at every level.

vanillandhoney · 02/05/2020 08:11

Yeah, I do.

I'm much happier without two hours of commuting and long days and working weekends and bank holidays.

But I do have MH issues that are exacerbated by lack of sleep and stress. I now have neither and am ten times happier than I ever was before.

We don't have children either.

Namenic · 02/05/2020 08:12

Yeah - changed career from stressful job to non-stressful one. I’d rather have less responsibilities currently.

thismushroom · 02/05/2020 08:16

You may not have the enthusiasm for the promotion but if it wouldn't make you unhappy or cause stress then that's not the same thing. You could always give yourself a trial in the role.
I have been working at a far lower level than I could but it is my choice to because my role just before my first dc nearly broke me and I'm not going to go through that again. I enjoy work now for the most part. It's not where my years of study where meant to take me but I am infinitely happier.

CloudsCanLookLikeSheep · 02/05/2020 08:20

I did for the past 8 years and am now at the point where the lack of career fulfillment is eating away, kids are older and I'm regretting putting my career on hold.

At the time it was the right decision though, it's just I'm now ready for something more challenging. You can't have it all, have to make the best choice at the time.

bellinisurge · 02/05/2020 08:20

I do for health reasons. And DH who was junior to me when I met him, is going in the opposite direction. And it's not code for "I have to do all the cooking and housework ". We still share that.

SallyWD · 02/05/2020 08:22

I do because I wanted to focus on family life following having cancer when my children were very young.

Qgardens · 02/05/2020 08:22

I traded a professional job for a no stress, part time one. No regrets. But I do have a dh who earns well.

It depends on finances I suppose.

Rowgtfc72 · 02/05/2020 08:26

I pack fish in a factory. Work 6am to 2pm, no weekends, no overtime.

Its minimum wage but I live in a very cheap area, my mortgage is equivalent to one weeks wage. I have savings, we have holidays and nice things.

I took this job originally as a stop gap, then dd came along and it meant I could work opposite shifts to dh and not have to pay childcare.

My job is entirely stress free, I work with many different people, it's not exciting but hey, theres always the weekends!

I have a BA hons in English. I'm not the only over qualified person working there either.

Meruem · 02/05/2020 08:30

Well I don’t have a partner so that doesn’t influence my decision at all. But yes I did. Took a lower level job, with a not insignificant pay cut, as it was very low stress (basically not stressful at all) and wfh. Instead of hours of commuting and extremely stressful office based. I don’t regret it for one second. I still have enough money to live well but my quality of life has improved drastically. I have so much more free time and am able to enjoy it more as I’m not exhausted all the time.

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