Very common friend issues...

[VioletPickles]

I know this has been done to death. And i probably need to stand up for my self. But I am anxious and it plays on my mind far too much. I have a friend - know her for 10 years plus. Were very close but probably less so now. When I saw her on the school run or out shes very loud and chatty , perfectly nice, suggests i call /make a plan to meet up. Shes one of the alpha mums probably.

However, when i attempt to call / or message or make plans she completely blanks me every time. Or even comment on the nursery whats app / school FB pages. No response. Even when i reach out and say I've been a bit down/ anxious and would love a catch up ( not every message, just once)

No reply. Do i message and ask if there is a problem? Say nothing and feel a bit shit? Coast until we are all back at school and then what? Ignore? I absolutely hate confrontation and i am pretty low key. My DH says don't let it bother you. And I so wish i could do that but my anxiety gets the better of me i think. FYI I am pretty normal i think!

I think deep down you know the answer, she is a just a show friend. In public she will act friendly but if she really wanted to be friends she would meet up with you etc. She is clearly not a nice person so don't play her games and just be polite in public but don't engage. I have seen these so called Alpha mums at school (true alphas are kind caring and inclusive)but they really aren't they are usually incredibly insecure and once school is finished quite pathetic really. I know it's hard but just try not to let her bother you and one day she won't and you'll wonder why you were. Concentrate on you and yours, be strong you are worth it

Don’t give her any more of your time and thought. I know it’s hard as I can feel like this sometimes and get anxious or get stressed and worked up because they haven’t replied but she sounds like a knob and it’s not a nice person or she’d reply to your texts.

You are both so right, sometimes i justvheed to be told. I’m genuinely pretty sure I have done or said anything to offend. Maybe I’m just not cool enough. But like you say, a kind person would reply. It’s really unpleasant not too. Onwards and upwards!