Age Gaps

[EuphegeniaDoubtfire]

This has been done to death, I'm sure.

My son has just turned 4. My husband and I were planning to start trying for our second this January but I was made redundant, and now the virus has happened so it'll likely be put off until next year.

So, I guess I'm wondering if that'll be too large an age gap. What is the ideal gap between siblings? I'm not complaining- I'm lucky to have one and I quite like our small bubble, but I'm also close to my siblings so I'd like my son to have that.

We have 5 and a half years between DS1 and DD, then 2 years between DD and DS2. Never felt like too big a gap, even between the boys If anything they''re closer to eachother than either of them are with DD! Generally all get along well with no issues because of age.
From a parenting perspective I found the bigger gap easier as DS1 was already at school by the time I had DD. I found it much harder when I had toddler DD and baby DS2 both at home!

I don't think there's an ideal. My dad had 11 and 13 years between him and his two siblings and they're all incredibly close to each other both now and in childhood. My mum's sister is three years younger and they're not that close. my sister and I two years and very close. my husband and his brother 19 months and have a good relationship but not as close. Think it just depends on the individual relationship and characteristics of children.

There's just over 5 years in us, we were never that close as kids but then we also didn't squabble and bicker constantly like some of my friend's kids do who are 2-3 years apart in age. I think you tend to be less competitive if there's a larger age gap. The bigger gap also means you don't have things like 2 kids doing big exams (GCSEs / Alevels) at the same time and one should be through uni before the other goes if you had to support them financially through that. We're both closer as adults than we ever were as kids.

I don’t think it really matters. All age gaps have advantages and disadvantages.