I have posted before about my struggles with my boss, who is ultimately my CEO too. He belittles me, talks about me behind my back, phones me shouting down the phone to the point my partner cannot believe it, tries to catch me out all the time, puts pressure on me to do things then never responds to my work after I submit it, if I do get feedback it’s either all negative or ‘just ok’ at best.
Most of the time he ignores me and all my submissions, I used to chase all the time to no avail so just let him get back to me when he had time. He made a comment to me that another colleague was annoying him chasing him for a response, so I had presumed I was doing the right thing in giving him time and then he emails me today accusing me of not doing something, I said I had and had sent it a week ago to him, he replies saying I need to be more proactive and stop sitting on my hands and if I need an answer, ask him, he has lots of things to remember and I need to stop using him as an excuse for things not getting done. I do everything in a timely manner and then when I get feedback he hates it or thinks it's pointless. He told me today that some of that work I have done with another agency is pointless and that it has very little impact, without trawling through emails he cannot remember the last thing that was done it had such little importance. This is from the same man who came into my office to say well done for securing and placing the finished work with the same agency before lockdown.
My mental health is rapidly spiralling, I’m not eating sleeping and my anxiety levels and depression are through the roof. HR won’t do anything (family run business and CEO is part of family). I just need some positive words to get me through. I’m scared that I get flustered and make a mistake or say something wrong and he pounces on it. I am very confident (normally) but he is breaking me down. I don't want to get out of bed. I have sent my cv round agencies but timing is not on my side. Please give me some tips and advice for getting through this until I can escape?! I sit at my home desk and when I hear a ‘ping’ my stomach sinks. Help me with some positivity