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Original poster

Depression and lockdown

14 replies

Namechange3007 · 29/04/2020 14:58

Please don't flame me. I'm sure this has been done many times but am struggling. I have depression and I am on medication. I eat healthily and run a few times a week or go on a bike ride. Am getting fresh air. Got plenty of inside and outside space. Am working from home, so is my husband and our kids aged 8 and 12 are home too. My son and husband seek fine, finding lots to do, my daughter who is the older one has loads of school work and is getting on with that.
I'm struggling though. I haven't achieved anything, I just want to be in bed all the time and have naps. Feel really low and don't know what to do. Dont want to offload onto friends as am in a much better position than a lot of them
I feel out of breath a lot (I have asthma) and just lethargic with no motivation. I take iron tablets as my iron can get low at times but I have a balanced diet.

OP posts:
Original poster
Namechange3007 · 29/04/2020 14:59

Seem not seek.

OP posts:
venusandmars · 29/04/2020 15:06

I haven't been depressed since my last long episode nearly 20 years ago. But I could have written your post. I am trying to get outdoors (and I'm fine when I'm there). I'm trying to stick to some kind of routine.

But everything is just wearing me down, and I want to hibernate in bed.

I usually wfh so having everyone in 'my space' is awful. I nearly bit dh's head off because he wanders into my space making noise, talking to me, putting the dishwasher on. I can't think and I'm irritable. I want to lay down in a quiet dark room. All the time.

Flowers for you OP
It's hard when so many others around are having a terrible time, but depression doesn't discriminate, it can affect anyone.

Bingeslayer · 29/04/2020 15:09

Yep its shit isn't it and don't even get me started on the guilt over not doing enough with the kids.

Original poster
Namechange3007 · 29/04/2020 16:22

Thanks. Went to bed cos felt nauseous. Husband has done cooking with kids and now gone for bike ride. I just want to hibernate.

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Original poster
Namechange3007 · 29/04/2020 16:41

I've not been setting an alarm in the morning and maybe I should? Ends up rushing to get sorted so can work.

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TerrifiedandWorried · 29/04/2020 17:17

I think setting an alarm might help. My depression has seriously flared up with all this - I'm on a rollercoaster, every day is different. The only things I have found that help are doing physical stuff eg gardening until I'm dropping with exhaustion and...er...that's it.

Original poster
Namechange3007 · 29/04/2020 17:25

Yes I think I might do that tomorrow. I am quite a lazy demotivated person and lockdown makes it worse.

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Difficultcustomer · 29/04/2020 17:25

OP I understand a little (though everyone’s depression is so individual that it’s only a little).

I have depression, on medication and I’m generally very well but Covid has got me down. It gets me when I’m WFH. We haven’t had a lot to do so I’m dwelling on things like whether I’m not doing enough - are colleagues doing more. I’m at a desk try to keep my mind occupied and otherwise in bed.

Perfectstorm12 · 29/04/2020 17:26

I've stopped engaging with anything that makes me start thinking about what I 'should' be doing with my kids, any social media about what other people are doing with their kids, anything about crafting, baking, exercise, basically anything that will make me go on a comparison spiral...which is pretty much everything at the moment! I'm shit at telling myself that I am doing ok, so I'm trying to protect myself by not engaging that process as I seem to be good at finding it everywhere if I'm not careful. There are no benchmarks right now, there are no goals, we need to let go of the stuff that tells us we are not doing ok and not good enough as we are. For me, all that is just depression in disguise. I go and lie down when I feel really shit, and just try and sleep for a bit. I think I am kinder after I have retreated for a while.

Original poster
Namechange3007 · 29/04/2020 17:31

Yes. I have been in bed for a few hours and I do feel better for it. I've also deleted Twitter. Might log out of facebook too.
I miss my friends and social interaction. Its not the same on a computer. My kids miss their friends, think my youngest misses that whole running round the playground, playing football, interaction. We are lucky but that doesnt mean it's not hard. I'm not sleeping very well either.

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TerrifiedandWorried · 29/04/2020 17:46

I find phone calls much better than video calls. I'm finding it very difficult to concentrate on anything though today.

Original poster
Namechange3007 · 30/04/2020 08:24

Yes. I liked video calls to start with but now just spend them looking at myself in horror thinking is that really how I look!

OP posts:
Original poster
Namechange3007 · 30/04/2020 08:26

I did set an alarm this morning but then just made a cup of tea and brought it back to bed. Oh well.
Took me about 2 hours to get to sleep last night.

OP posts:
Perfectstorm12 · 30/04/2020 17:11

If you can't be kind about how you look then stop looking at yourself during video calls...turn that bitch voice down!!

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