Is there ^anything^ at all a 2.5 and 4yo can do

[Coldhandscoldheart]

That will occupy them for a bit without making a metric fuckton of mess, or screaming and that isn’t a screen?
They paint sometimes, actually 4yo can do it for a while, but then will start painting each other or the furniture.
Or am I just expecting too much?

Party with party games, pass the parcel, dancing, party food

Set up a den with blankets, put some toys in there and see if they'll play? If you have a garden mine love making "potions", some water in a pot and adding different leaves, flowers, etc. Let them "wash" something outside (even though it'll be a crap job it might keep them busy). As for clothes, unless their soaked through or have wet paint on I leave them in the same clothes all day, it doesn't really matter.

If all else fails there's nothing wrong with wine for you and TV for them. You can't be a super engaged parent all the time. Cut yourself some slack x

Golly! From memory, back in the day in Italy when we were frequently in 'lockdown' we'd take the littlies on a 'nature walk' - this translated into finding Special Stones, which we'd haul home, wash, and paint. We painted a LOT of Special Stones!
In the autumn we'd find a lot of Special Leaves, which we'd press(and check every day) and mount them in a Special Book. Think you may be doing that at some time too!
I've got a lot of pics of ds in his Mothercare-by-post coverall hand paintings.
Have fun, everybody!

Water beads bounce! I swear I’m still finding the sticky wee fuckers!
They did like them though, maybe I should get some more,

@user2085372673 that made me laugh. Tbh some voices reminding me we’re not alone is quite nice. It’s worse for DH, I get to go to work some of the time, but that’s also stressful, I think I’ve brought some home with me.

We do sometimes do washing the windows, but all they really want to do is spray, not rub.

Oh yes, and I thoroughly endorse Watchouts suggestion of wine for us + TV for them

@sittingonacornflake I never understood this either, surely you still need to wipe the shower curtain etc.

I cut the top & bottom off a bin liner and lay that out, when they've done fold it all in on itself & straight in the bin

When I was really pregnant with DC2, I used to put DC1 and DC2 in the bathtub with a can of shaving foam and some toy cars to play 'car wash.' I used to sit on the floor in the bathroom and read whilst they covered cars in foam and rinsed them. It is so hard at this age and every activity only seems to last five minutes! This would buy me half an hour on a good day

Dc3! Not some miraculous person who can put an unborn baby in the bath

Play-doh is good for both those ages. I did find you have to sit with them and get stuck in at that sort of age. No sitting down and having a cuppa.

Or hop scotch. The 2 year old will struggle with coordination, but mine would happily chuck a stone, jump randomly to the end, and turn round and come back.

Duplo Lego? Again, you'll need to be involved.

Anything involving water or bubbles outside. Give them a watering van and two buckets. They'll move the water from one to the other and then back again for a good while. Tell them to collect sticks and /or stones from the garden? Again, with stones, give them a couple of tubs of sort and they might just spend some time putting them in one.

Nope. Well nothing that doesn't make a fuckton of mess really. IMO

BUT...least messy...

Bath with various cups, bottles, pots, spoons - bubble bath, ends of shower gel/shampoo/conditioner Dolls/cars/ etc. Tea set.

Until they've turned into prunes!! Obviously ties you to the bathroom but at least it stops the mess in every room of the house and stops the whinging!!

Any kind of den as long as they play in it for a bit. Obstacle course if your furniture is up to it

I don't mind play doh etc as long as it's in one place (at the table/on the hard floor) it does NOT go into the carpeted areas.

Gin. Lots of gin &/or coffee ☕️ & 🍰

It really is a lively tune 2 & 4 - but it is sometimes also fucking relentless!!!

Sock sorting!

Vacuuming. Chalking outside. Skipping outside. Doing handstands on the settee.

Playing sleeping lions.

Dusting!
I kept my older niece and nephew happily amused for at least 90 minutes by giving them each a duster and asking them to dust the horizontal surfaces they could see/reach.
Or the memory game, with 5 or 6 objects on a tray. Let them look at the tray for 30 seconds, then cover with a drying up cloth and they have to remember as many items as they can (could be more items and you could also require the colour of the items, too).

I have 3 year old and 20month old. Only thing they do together for any length of time without fighting is "obstacle course". Basically I put a spare mattress on floor, tell them to jump off couch, run round kitchen table 3 times etc etc. 3 year old loves trying to do it as fast as possible, 20minth old just follows her. I sit with coffee/wine depending on time of day and make up increasingly ridiculous instructions.

Honestly - there are some lovely ideas here but all of them will require your participation and or will be messy.

The thought of your 4 year going off and independently choreographing a dance with your 2.5 year old? While I was writing this my 4 year old went off and poured water into the pipe that the hot air from the tumble dryer comes out of. I was wondering what the steam was. My 22 month old is currently eating frozen chips, neither by the way are messy if that’s any help?

 @Mylittlepony374

Week 6. Attempt some sort of learning. Give up after 15 mins. Allow them to play feral.

Oh. Should have added. Attempt also to work full time at home.

Fill a plant spray with water, give them each a cloth and let them "clean" the windows or kitchen cupboards.
Play dough doesn't make much mess if you limit it to the kitchen table.
My dcs enjoy clipping clothes pegs to things e.g cushions or the curtains.
Turn the laundry dry basket or a box on its side and see if they can roll balls into it.
Dressing up box.

The only two things that have worked for mine of the same age in the past 5 weeks have been Hama beads (big one cracked on and I 'helped' little one). It wasn't relaxing though coz I essentially did the little ones while they just messed on with beads.

The other one was a bucket of water and two paint brushes and I asked them to paint the fence. That kept them busy for ages.

Thank you user2085372673, you've made me laugh. Some of these suggestions are insane, I think people have forgotten what kids that age are capable of.

OP I am also all touched out.

I recommend Netflix. And Disney+ (free trial).

And Duplo or brio. Then hide. Run away and hide (in earshot).

My kids currently watching Corey Carson on Netflix whilst I drink tea in the kitchen counting the minutes until dh comes down from upstairs, and feeling v grateful that Morrisons managed to deliver rum this morning.

you need the 5 minute mum. lots of quick set up ideas on facebook. my 2.5yos fave is pass the parcel but with Peggy puzzle pieces. old newspaper or wrapping paper and she loves it.

Are they into fancy dress? That used to amuse my DC. Also taking all the Tupperware out and matching up the lids or (shudders) the musical instrument box.

They’re 4 now and I get the most peace when they set up a shop and play, or if they’re on the tablet (don’t judge! Wfh FT) Or if they’re worn out they will watch a film which somehow seems better than CBeebies.

does the 4yo have any bingo style matching orchard games, 2.5 yo likes finding the right place on the board for them?

Also now DC are older I’ve been telling them I need timeout too and if they play alone without shouting for me in their room until the oven timer buzzes we will get the garden hose out/face paints/nail polish /bake or one of the other ‘A Game’ parenting activities. Maybe if the older one did that you’d only have the littlie to amuse for at least a bit?