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Original poster

Funerals, what happens now?

19 replies

CelloMellow · 28/04/2020 11:58

A friend of my parents has died, in usual times I would go to the funeral. What happens now? (It will be local to me but not my parents).

OP posts:

Burpalot · 28/04/2020 11:59

Sorry for you loss. I wouldn't go. I'd leave as many spots for their friends and family. Lots of info online www.gov.uk/government/publications/covid-19-guidance-for-managing-a-funeral-during-the-coronavirus-pandemic/covid-19-guidance-for-managing-a-funeral-during-the-coronavirus-pandemic

Dinosauraddict · 28/04/2020 11:59

Close family only atm.

Elsa8 · 28/04/2020 12:00

We’ve had a recent bereavement and the local crematorium is limited to ten people only, so it’s immediate family only.

P1nkHeartLovesCake · 28/04/2020 12:01

Well it will only be for close family given the current circumstances. Sadly you will not be attending

PennyArrowBar · 28/04/2020 12:13

If you can walk to where the hearse will be passing then you could go and stand and pay your resorts that way.

It's what seems to be happening a lot here anyway. I'm sorry for your loss.

Harriett123 · 28/04/2020 12:18

Immediate family only. We had my MIL funeral just as lockdown started.
It was her 3 children, her sister, her 2 adult nephews (without there wife's or children) and me. They didnt even open the church so it was just a graveside service.

There will be a memorial service / more public funeral after lockdown perhaps on the anniversary of her death. This would be something which friends of the family will attend so perhaps your friend will do the same.

GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER · 28/04/2020 12:24

At a old friend’s funeral recently, only 5 were allowed - not even enough for all the family.
Just send a suitable card.

Purplewithred · 28/04/2020 12:27

The service might be live-streamed - my cousin's was. I was able to phone my aunt afterwards and talk about the service, which my aunt really appreciated.

GrumpySausage · 28/04/2020 12:42

I think it varys between crematoriums/churches. The family will have been told.

My nans funeral is next week and the crematorium has said 10 people are allowed. This has meant her children and grandchildren can attend, but each separate household must maintain social distancing. I'll be attending alone with our dh, and my parents will be attending but I'm unable to sit within 2 metres of them.

Unless you are close family, I would send a card or if you know the route of the hearse, pay your respects that way.

Pinkblueberry · 28/04/2020 12:47

It’s my DH aunt’s funeral this week, they were told only 10 can attend. My DH and I are not going - those who are going have been invited too. So unless you’ve been specifically asked to attend I’m not sure you have the option anyway. Sorry for your loss

Seeitsortit · 28/04/2020 13:19

All depends on the church/crem but generally by invitation only due to very strict numbers. You can ask about webcast but if the person was a very popular person we have been told there is a cap on the amount of people who can log on due to servers unable to cope otherwise, so again if webcast if it is you may not be able to see it live but my dads is available for 28 days afterwards.
Singing is banned/not encouraged, social distancing at all times, coffins are not to be pall bearered in, flowers are difficult to get hold of.
It’s a hard time to bury your loved one.

UhKevin · 28/04/2020 13:23

See coffins are being borne by pallbearers in some areas.

A lot of policies vary by area, venue (and one consistency is no church funerals right now) and funeral director.

OP, perhaps ask the family if they’re planning a memorial service later in place of the ‘full’ funeral that would normally happen now. That is what we are doing.

LER83 · 28/04/2020 13:30

My uncles funeral was yesterday. Immediate family only so his 2 children, 3 grandchildren and 2 nephews went. It was live streamed so my dad watched it from home. This was in Scotland. Everything else was the same.

ParkheadParadise · 28/04/2020 13:33

It's so sad to be having a funeral just now. A funeral is part of the grieving process.
In my local area friends are standing on the route the hearse passes so they can pay their respects.

Redglitter · 28/04/2020 13:33

A friend of mine was at a funeral last week. They were allowed 20 people there so it was by invitation only

doodlyfiddly · 28/04/2020 14:53

I'm sorry for your loss.

We recently lost my Uncle. His service was live-streamed. I don't know how common that is though.

ElaineMarieBenes · 28/04/2020 15:36

A friend ‘attended’ a funeral in the U.K. yesterday via live streaming (we are overseas)

MrsAvocet · 28/04/2020 15:53

A friend of ours was buried yesterday. Only a few people were able to attend, not even the whole family. Lots of people stood in their gardens as the hearse passed by though. The family have posted on social media that the support from the community meant a lot to them. They are planning to hold a memorial service when things get back to normal, though I think it could be quite a long time in the future.

Ladyglitterfairydust · 28/04/2020 17:05

My friends gran recently passed away. My friend lives about 250 miles away and only a handful of people were allowed at the funeral. But the funeral was shown online somehow and my friend watched it like that. So did the majority of friends and family. It’s not the same, but my friend really appreciated being able to watch.

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