A gifted child?

[AnonMummy2020]

Prepared to be told I'm being precious about my PFB! But do think my LO is a bit advanced compared to peers.

DC is 16 months, can read letters and knows alphabet, can also sound out simple syllables (reading)-ma, ba, pa. Also can count to five and show the numbers with fingers. Also says about 50 words (understood by others) in two languages, makes two word sentences, and understands hundreds more and follows complies commands (two steps) in both languages.

Im a bit embarrassed to ask my NCT group how their DC compare as I don't want to seem I'm boasting if LO is advanced, IYSWIM. OH and I aren't doing anything in particular to encourage LO, just talking loads and LO is quite curious I'd say.

Does this seem advanced for this age? Should we do anything to help LO?

He's definitely far more advanced than my DD who is nearly the same age, but when they're so young it's sort of irrelevant, as generally they all tend to catch up to one another at a certain point anyway. It's like the babies who walk at nine months v the ones who walk at 16 months. In a couple of years time, it's not a noticeable thing.

I had this with one of my dc - could recognise every number and letters by 2. Yes it is hyperlexia. My dd is now in juniors and high up on the reading scheme and a year ahead in maths.

It can sometimes be accompanied by a few deficits in other areas and is for my dd. I don’t want to worry you, just keep an eye on social and communication skills.

I also find that different kids can be advanced at different things. Like my DD has been sort of slow with gross motor, on track with communication but way way ahead with her fine motor skills. About six months ahead in some of the tasks (which amazes me as I am the least dexterous person ever, but she obviously takes after DH!). But she's only just started walking unaided at 14.5mo whereas some of her little pals have been walking for several months now. So it's kind of horses for courses.

I don't think there's a need to do anything different. He's just a toddler so continue letting him play and learn how he is

My older daughter was very similar at 16 months, especially with the alphabet and numbers, she is at grammar school now and is bright but middle set. My younger is also at grammar school, top set, but she didn't do anything early!

I played maths games with dd eg taught her to add and subtract with pieces of melon between the ages of 2 and 3, which she loved!

Also did alphabet songs and used phonics dvds just to ensure she was getting the phonics correct as they would later be taught in school

But we were advised by SLT (dd has a few speech issues) to concentrate mostly on things promoting a wide range of developmental areas eg:

• communication, so playing games, singing, chatting

• motor skills etc

It's really irrelevant at 16 months old. They should just be learning through play at that age, you don't need to do anything special. Wait until they start school and go from there.

You child sounds advanced linguistically (but not outside the scope of normal). That’s not the same as being gifted though. My children also knew the alphabet, numbers, shapes etc early on. This was because we had a lot of toys and books incorporating these. They didn’t learn to read early. One is good with reading, the other is good with maths. Both of them excel in some other areas but are quite behind in others. Children develop at different paces (often as a result of their external environment) and you can’t reliably identify ‘gifted’ children until late teens/in truly exceptional circumstances. My advice to you would be to stop comparing your child to others and to teach your child that the only truly important measure is their own personal progress.

The main thing is that your little one is happy, stimulated and healthy. Don't focus on them being "gifted" or not because that's putting unnecessary pressure on yourself and (unintentionally) on them.

Your little one is more advanced than most. I used to work in a nursery that started from 24 months, and less than half of the children that age were doing all of what you describe at 16 months. I did notice that bilingual children tended to be much more advanced linguistically at that age.

My advice is not to make a big thing of DC being advanced in front of them, because sooner or later everyone evens out (even prodigies aren't prodigies anymore once they're adults) and that can be damaging if it's become part of someone's identity.

There is no harm at all though in nurturing your DC's interests; for eg, if they seem interested in learning to read, then that's a lovely thing for them to do with you in a low-pressure way and some 2-3 year olds get great pleasure from reading to themselves.

The best thing you can do to assist learning is through play.

I think its really hard to tell at this age. Well, I guess Mrs Mozart probably had some idea that she had a prodigy on her hands, but most brighter than average toddlers won't turn out to be exceptional. My DD spoke in full sentences that were fully comprehensible by strangers by the time she was 18 months old. It was a bit freaky in fact as she was really tiny so most people thought she was only about 12 months old. Lots of people told me she was a genius. She isn't. She is brighter than average and still a great communicator but nothing exceptional. Her brother who was still on single words at a year old is actually far more academic.
I'm not trying to rain on your parade - it sounds like you have a lovely bright and engaging little girl - but just don't overthink things. Lots of play, let her develop according to what her interests prove to be as she grows up a d see where that takes you. Just don't be surprised, or worried, if things level off with time.

Your child does sound advanced, but please don't try 'teaching'. Think more of providing rich experiences and vocab. Also just wanted to point out the 'm' in English phonics is mmm not ma. Another point, knowing the alphabet is ok but can hinder reading,as children can get confused between letter name and sound. Sound is taught first, then letter name because the letter name on its own is mostly useless, without other letters to make a sound or group of sounds which are blended to make words. Letter names are needed for writing, which comes slightly later.

What's the other language?

Sorry I don't know why I said 'he' in all my posts. I think I misread 'this' as 'his'!

It does sound advanced, certainly.

In terms of what you can do to "help":

• continue giving opportunities to develop the activities they enjoy: share books, hold conversations, sing nursery rhymes

• make sure you give plenty of opportunity to develop the skills the child isn't so advanced in; particularly if, as is often the case, they're areas you and your partner find less easy.

I once read a thing identifying nine areas of intelligence: lexical, numeric, (erm, something else), musical, creative, practical, physical, social and emotional. Trying to discover the something else I find a slightly different list at web.cortland.edu/andersmd/learning/MI%20Table.htm

Don't be tempted into the hothousing that produces the kids like Ruth Lawrence or the ones on Child Genius. It's very rare that children taken on that path even keep up to average with all of the other areas.

Also, we sometimes tend to interpret what a child is doing in terms of our own understanding. "Counting" for instance may well be mimicking without any actual understanding of numbers. One of my children would "read" his favourite books apparently quite fluently at the age of 3, pointing to the words and pictures appropriately, and turning the pages at the right time. He wasn't reading of course, but he had a jolly good memory. One of the others had a fascination with numbers and as a preschooler would ask me to "draw a three Mummy". He could "write" numbers and "count" but actually he was trying to draw shapes and recite sounds that appealed to him, just like another child might try to draw a house or recite a nursery rhyme, he wasn't actually numerate, though it looked like he was.
Not that these things are bad. They just might not be quite how they appear.
One of my sisters is a Reception teacher in a fairly affluent area and every year she is faced with parents who tell her that their child can already read who then get angry when she gives them books without words or very simple words. Some of them are indeed very bright of course, but she says that many are sounding out the words accurately but their comprehension is not at the same level. Others can't read a single word but can pick up on quite nuanced ideas from the pictures that others are oblivious too.
There are so many different aspects of a child's development and they really all do develop differently.

I remember meeting my friend's 18 month old saying for the first time and him saying "oh mummy, look at that orange balloon" and being staggered because my almost 2 year old couldn't speak that fluently. My friend was similarly surprised when my ds started telling the time and reading before he turned 3.

They're both all grown up now and have done well academically, but neither is a genius. I think in general that early development is not a particularly good indicator of exceptional intelligence. Particularly in first children

Thing is you must be doing things to encourage, even subconsciously, because no child will look at the letter T and immediately know it's a "tttt" sound without being told.
Sometimes as parents we do these things naturally without thinking, other times it's a conscious attempt to teach them. As long as you're not forcing the child then it doesn't really matter.

Children do pick up quickly what they are interested in. Sometimes this translates into academic ability, sometimes it doesn't. Mine were early readers. What did that mean? It meant they read fluently very early, and... that's it. Children who started to read later picked it up and did better by GCSE.
Do I regret them reading? No, they enjoyed it. Has it helped them academically? I doubt it.

Best thing to do is let them do what they enjoy (obviously not if that's sticking their hands down the toilet) If they like playing with letters, that's fine. If they want to play with their cars, then that's fine too.

If they're interested then they'll learn it.

I think children that talk early do tend to have people assuming that they're bright. That's simply because they can show their understanding in their responses.

@MrsAvocet
I agree. Dd2 picked up the alphabet song when she was quite tiny because dd1 sang it. She was singing it before she was 18 months, and other mothers made very impressed noises, even when I said she didn't understand what it was.
As far as she was concerned she was singing a fun song that dd1 sang. One day she asked me what "Elemenoh-pea" meant
She had no concept it was linked to letters.

Wow! That’s amazing - your child certainly sounds pretty gifted to me. You’re doing a fab job by the looks of it - very impressed by the two languages. Can I ask if you have a specific routine every day for teaching words etc?
My DD is 12 months and we regularly use flash cards and I talk to her constantly but any tips would be great

At 16 months it’s really hard to tell how ‘gifted’ they actually are. All kids developed their skills at different rates. For example my kids all walked properly by 9 months old, my nephew didn’t take a step until he was 18 months - you now can tell who walked first between him and DS2 (only a few weeks between them in age)

It may well be that your child is extremely gifted but all you need to do now is encourage thier curiosity and provide opportunity to learn through play.

DS1 could read fluently when he was 2, his reading age when he started school at 4 was assessed by Ed Pysch as 14+, yet he didn’t utter a single word until he was 2.5, was still in nappies at age 6 and has poor social skills.
DD on the other hand was talking in proper grown up sentences by the age of 2, knew 100s and 100s of words. I remember at her 2 year review the health visitor was astounded by her speech. She’s now 11 and although a bright girl she’s not ‘extremely gifted’

Every child developes and learns things, and often that depends on the parents passions and skills eg we are both bookworms so it’s not surprising that DS1 loves books and so learn to read so early - we had 100s of books and were always reading to him. It’s amazing how quickly they pick things up. I think you can only say they are properly gifted once they get to about 4/5 and are doing things at a level many many years a head.

Just enjoy your baby without the pressure of being compared to others.You'll enjoy motherhood so much more.❤

@Jupiter202020201 I'm not convinced that flash cards is a particularly good idea - particularly at 12 months old. You'd be much better off looking at books together and (as well as you reading the words on the page) talking about the pictures and oooh what do you think might happen next. Decoding is only one part of decent reading skills and context is important.

I got the impression that OP's child speaks two languages because their parents have different native languages. If you want your child to have foreign language skills (and in this country who could blame you for wanting to get a head start on that) then again you need to provide context. Perhaps learn some nursery rhymes in a language you have some knowledge of (to get the pronunciation vaguely accurate)? Or maybe sit your daughter down with you and watch Pobol Y Cwm - you could read the subtitles and she might pick things up gradually through exposure.

Have you read my earlier comment (at 13:48:18) about broadening the child's abilities in other areas? I think this is vitally important, particularly for children who are significantly advanced in academics. Not only are they less likely to be considered odd and immature by their classmates, they're less likely to be so far ahead in specific areas that they get both bored by school and into the habit of thinking that they're somehow special and better than everyone else.

(I could read by the time I was three, by the way, simply because my older sister read Heidi to me. A lot of what I preach was learnt the hard way.)