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Leaving a dog at home during the day

134 replies

quidamaz · 25/04/2020 16:55

Hi MNers.

Do any of you leave your dog at home during the day while you're at work? How do you make it work? Does your pup cope ok?

We've just got a new puppy (much loved, much wanted, but bad timing) but from September when I'm back at work he'll be alone from 730-430 every day with a dog walker at lunchtimes.

(PLEASE don't jump on me and tell me a hundred times why I shouldn't do this. I KNOW people do this! There's no way people don't leave their dogs surely? We had originally budgeted for doggy daycare but at £25 a day we can no longer afford it now DH has lost the business thanks to Corona. It's going to take us at least 18 months to get back on our feet financially at the very least.)

Thanks for any advice.

OP posts:
EveryLifeHasASoundtrack · 26/04/2020 13:37

You can’t leave a dog, especially a puppy, alone for that long. We currently have 2 young dogs that we’ve had from puppies. Luckily I work from home so they’re rarely left for more than an hour. They still were not fully house trained by 6 months and they need a lot of company. You’re the dogs whole world, he’ll be miserable if you leave him for that long.

vanillandhoney · 26/04/2020 13:38

You can't leave a young dog on its own all day - it's not fair. Either you're going to come home to a destroyed house as it'll be in its teenage phase, or you'll have to shut it in it's crate all day long.

If you can't afford daycare or can't be around for your dog, then don't get one, and I say this as a dog walker/sitter.

The vast majority of my clients are people who are home for their dogs but who can't manage their exercise needs, or who need me on the odd occasion their dogs will be left longer than 3-4 hours.

Sorry OP I know it's not what you wanted to hear but it's true. Leaving a dog all day long is cruel - they're sociable creatures and need interaction and companionship. There's a reason rescues won't rehome to people who are out of the house all day.

What do you think your adolescent dog will do all day while you're out? Because believe me, they won't just sleep nicely on the sofa like an old dog might. Adolescent dogs get bored and when they're bored they cause mischief - whether that's toileting on the floor, eating your sofa or barking their heads off all day.

I once left mine for twenty minutes to have a shower and he ate all my scatter cushions Grin I dread to think what he'd have done if I'd actually left him alone all day. I don't think I'd have had a sofa to sit on!

wishingforapositiveyear · 26/04/2020 13:40

There are so many rude judgemental people on these kind of threads. OP is home till September then has a dog walker, she isn't talking about leaving the dog home all day with no walks or entertainment.

It works for us , we have a great dog walker so DDOG is out at least 2 hours. Then snoozes a lot before being taken out again when we are home. We tried doggy day care but she hated it , she is a small quite lazy breed so even when we are home she just snoozes constantly. I am out 7.30-5.30 but teenage DD shifts don't usually start till 2pm.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

Elieza · 26/04/2020 13:41

If your DP has no job because he’s lost it during CV then presumably he will look after it during the day until he gets a new job - at which point you will afford day care again?

I don’t see the problem here? Or is it just me? Hmm

PanicAtTheDiscLo · 26/04/2020 13:42

I feel like a doughnut, but if DH has lost the business why can’t he stay with the dog.
It’s too long really even with a dog walker for a little pup. They’ll be seeing and pooing all over the place or you’ll need to crate them which isn’t fair for 9h

Maltay · 26/04/2020 13:42

Is there any retired neighbours that would be happy of the company during the day time? You could put up an advert in the local shop? It could be mutually beneficial they get the enjoyment of a dog without the cost or responsibility.

mumto2teenagers · 26/04/2020 13:49

We have a dog who is sometimes left alone, but not often for long periods. If we are all going to be out for long periods then we walk her before we go, then my dad calls round during the time we are out, he usually walks her and then stays at ours for a while. When we are rarely all out for the whole day we usually take her to my parents house. But our dog is 7 and after a walk usually sleeps for about an hour, she usually spends quite a bit of her day laying in the garden so isn’t that bothered being alone for short periods. Normally I work from home 2 days a week so that only leaves 3 days when I am out, DH works shifts, dd1 is at uni and DD2 at college so most of the time during those 3 days someone is home.

Even though our dog has been left before and seems okay with it I think once lockdown is over it will be difficult as she is now so used to having someone here all of the time, we are lucky that my dad is retired and lives close by. With a puppy it will be tough if you are out of the house 5 days a week.

Will your DH be working the same times as you? Could you or DH work from home part of the week?

It does depend a lot on the dog, some suffer with separation anxiety which means it just wouldn’t be possible to leave it as long as you are suggesting, even with a dog walker. Could you afford the daycare for part of the week?

WickedlyPetite · 26/04/2020 13:52

It absolutely depends on your dog and it's temperament.

We can't leave our dog for more than 3 hours max a day. After that he's howling, crying, pacing the kitchen, chewing the skirting boards.

And popping home to spend an hour with him doesn't reset the clock for him to be ok to leave him again for another 3 hours.

Honestly, if our situation changed - that we both had to be out of the house for as long as you're suggesting and we absolutely couldn't afford daycare - I'd be heartbroken but I'd have to rehome him because I know he wouldn't be living a happy life being left alone that long all week.

vanillandhoney · 26/04/2020 13:52

There are so many rude judgemental people on these kind of threads. OP is home till September then has a dog walker, she isn't talking about leaving the dog home all day with no walks or entertainment.

No, but a young adolescent dog needs a lot more stimulation just that one break at lunchtime. Teenage dogs get bored and create their own mischief - this normally involves eating things they shouldn't Grin

I am a dog walker and most of my clients aren't people who are out at work all day. Some are people who work from home, others are disabled and cannot manage the walks themselves, others have small children and get the dog taken out so they can have a proper walk without DC around.

Yes, some do work full-time but most arrange their shifts around each other so I'm only required on the days the dog will be left more than 3-4 hours. So the dogs might be walked first thing, then left 9-11, I come in for an hour, then they're left 12-2 until the other partner gets home from work.

So far as I can see very few people have been rude, they're just trying to prepare OP for the reality of life with a young dog. If you leave a young dog for too long they'll get bored and get themselves into all sorts of trouble.

applebottomjean · 26/04/2020 13:55

If you and your dh are both out of the house all day,and you can’t afford daycare, then frankly you are not in a position to have a dog.

Agreed!

YgritteSnow · 26/04/2020 13:58

Many people do this and it works fine. I'm sorry but it's true. Ask any Dog Walker. Only on MN do I see so much judgment and shaming about it. It's not ideal but not much in life is. Most dogs manage it well as long as they're used to it from the outset. Note I said most not all, before I am leapt on.

Long walk in the morning, dog walker middle of the day 90 minutes if possible, long walk as soon as you get in from work, short walk last thing at night. If you've got a garden all the better so they can be out snuffling around in there all the time you're gone. Dogs who get enough exercise pretty much sleep all day and get used to the routine.

YgritteSnow · 26/04/2020 14:00

Gone should be home. Obvs you can't generally leave a dog unsupervised in the garden all day long.

WickedlyPetite · 26/04/2020 14:07

Many people do this and it works fine. I'm sorry but it's true. Ask any Dog Walker

We yes quite, lots of dog walkers would of course say it works fine, they'd lose an awful lot of business if they were truthful that actually doggy daycare is far preferable for most dogs, than being left alone for pretty much 9 hours a day.

I did like the very honest post by the PP who is a dog walker.

Inforthelonghaul · 26/04/2020 14:14

I’m really sorry OP but I just can’t see how that is going to work. It will still be very young and tbh I think you would be risking it’s mental health and development as well it’s physical health, young dogs need company, stimulation and regular exercise and training. It would be an extremely unusual puppy to not suffer being left that long. Our dog was the most mellow creature ever but no way could have been left that long even in later years never mind as a boisterous adolescent. You need someone who can have the dog with them for some of the day at least. It’s not illegal but it’s not kind.

YgritteSnow · 26/04/2020 14:16

We yes quite, lots of dog walkers would of course say it works fine, they'd lose an awful lot of business if they were truthful

No. I was a dog walker for years and I did it because I love dogs and want them to be healthy and happy. It was the best job I ever had. This is my experience and it's true. Rather unpleasant to write off dog walkers as liars I think.

WickedlyPetite · 26/04/2020 14:52

You cut off the end of my sentence...

Most dog owners and dog lovers would agree that for most dogs, daycare is preferable to being left alone for 9 hours a day, even if that is with a midday visit.

If you disagree with that then that's fine, but you're probably in the minority.

LochJessMonster · 26/04/2020 15:01

I leave mine from 9-5 every day, except he has a dog walker on Thursdays for a bit of fun.

He doesn’t care. He has a routine. He knows it. 5pm is when he comes alive as he knows it’s long walk time. When I leave in the morning he waits for me to give him his treat and then wanders off with it. Doesn’t even watch me go out the door.

He is toilet trained and has never messed in the house. He’s not busting to go when I get in from work.

I use to come home at lunchtime but he wouldn’t go to the toilet and just went back to sleep.

He wanders around a bit, sleeps a lot, eats his frozen kong, watches out the window, sleeps even more.

It all depends on the individual dog and the routine. I’ve been doing it since he was about 1.5years old.

Dogs needs to sleep for 16 out of 24 hours so just make sure the awake hours are so fun and full of energy that he needs to sleep during the day.

Now I’m working from home full time, he is still spending the majority of the day sleeping. I can tell I’m annoying him and interrupting his day by daring to be here Grin

Cherrysoup · 26/04/2020 15:39

Dogs needs to sleep for 16 out of 24 hours so just make sure the awake hours are so fun and full of energy that he needs to sleep during the day.

Blow me, someone should tell mine that!

I think it’s bonkers to get a puppy knowing it’ll be left for so long come September. You should have got an older dog.

EveryLifeHasASoundtrack · 26/04/2020 16:24

Blow me, someone should tell mine that!

And mine. 🤣 They sleep about 8 hours overnight and then a few hours in the day, but they get up if I go to the kitchen or open the door to someone. There’s no way they sleep for 16 hours. They’d be so lonely and miserable if we were all out of the house for hours.

LochJessMonster · 26/04/2020 18:57

I only found out about the 16 hours a day thing recently and it blew my mind!
It was in an article about people working from home and behaviour changes in dogs not use to having to be alert during the day. They need time to process all the stuff that happens when they are awake.

Was quite interesting. Obviously not an exact science and all dogs are different.

amusedbush · 26/04/2020 20:29

I work 9-5 and DH is a postman so I’m off all weekend and he has a midweek day off. That means the dog is alone between 8:30am and (at the latest, and very rarely) 2pm four days a week. He’s walked before I leave, then again when DH gets home in the early afternoon.

I actually think he’s sick of me wfh at the moment, I’m seriously cramping his style Grin

Elieza · 26/04/2020 21:01

Dogs do not sleep for 16 hours. My next door neighbour has a barky little bastard who howls for the first 20mins when they leave to go to the school run and straight to their work places. Then she barks for the whole day for great long chunks of the day. Every single bastarding hour.

Every holiday I have had has been at home in my garden for the last decade as I don’t earn much and can’t afford holidays. Every holiday for ten years has therefore been spent listening to that barking dog.
The woman’s maternity leave and when they are on holiday/sick leave at home themselves and now WFH during CV has been great for me. The dog is not stressed and is quiet. I can relax without the continual noise.

This happened because she was ill when they got the puppy. It was lovebombed and then she got better and went back to work. The dog didn’t understand why it’s pack leader had vanished and barked to get her back. She did come back so the dog believed it was the barking that made her return and that behaviour pattern continued. They are lucky I have not gone to the council noise police but the dog is old so I don’t like to do anything now.

It’s cruel and selfish to have a dog and leave it for hours. It doesn’t matter that people used to do this all the time in the past. We know better now and daycare or dog walking should be factored into costs if you are out of the house more than about five hours. Puppies need training and stimulation. It may fit in nicely with daydreams about the perfect home with 2.5 children but the reality is very different.

Wolfiefan · 26/04/2020 21:30

My big dog could easily sleep for 16 hours!
The difference is I don’t expect her to be left all day. If she wants to nap for an hour or two then potter round the garden. Then later pop out to wee then she can.
It’s unkind to force a dog to do without company or access to the toilet for hours and hours on end. Some may well be able to manage. Doesn’t mean they like it or that their life wouldn’t be better if they weren’t left for so long.

LastTrainEast · 26/04/2020 21:41

I had a neighbour whose dog whined piteously from when he left for work to when he got back, but of course all he saw was the dog being pleased to see him when he got home. He didn't know that he was torturing an animal for his own brief pleasure in the evening of owning a dog.

QUIDAMAZz · 27/04/2020 11:11

OP HERE (NAME CHANGE)

Thanks for all your comments. I appreciate all the perspectives. I sent a message out to 6 of my real life friends/colleagues who have a dog, and 3 use a dog walker, 2 use daycare and 1 leaves the dog all day with nothing. So I was right in that it does happen. A few things to address:

-We don't have any neighbours. We live in a very detached house

-A dog walker is going to take him for 1.5 hours a day

-The DC and both of us LOVE the new puppy. We're not giving him back sorry to those who think we should.

-We've got a dog camera.

-He'll be 7 months old in September.

-DH is still working trying to rebuild our life. Can't go into details but he's not at home during the days.