I feel I need to write this down or get it out somehow and as soon as you speak to anyone in real life about children they get all excited so I just want impartial views.
Dh and I had ds1 19 months ago. I suffered severe PND which meant I felt I didn't want another. I didn't speak to anyone about it until recently, stupidly thinking I could sort it alone. Since seeking treatment, I've felt a million times better, like my patience is restored and like life has some sunshine in it.
Recent events have, like everyone I think, made us reevaluate our lives and goals, thoughts and feelings. Both DH and I have discussed what we want out of life, what parts of our life we enjoy etc and it's hit us like a ton of bricks that we would like another DC. Obviously not right now, pandemic and all that. But once all this is over and dh has sorted his job (he wants to take a drop in responsibility and stress levels to spend more time with us, which is whole heartedly support).
I think I know that once we had another, if I felt the same way as I did with DS, I would seek treatment sooner. And I'm fully aware that PND doesn't strike with each child. But I'm scared it would.
Ds would make such a brilliant big brother.
We live in a 2 bed flat, which we love. Dc would share a bedroom (I always shared rooms with my siblings) and do have a large storage room which could be a short term box room for second DC if needs be.
Finances would be stretched, but we would muddle through, we always do! Am I crazy to want a second DC after everything?