How motivated are you after 5 weeks in lockdown?

[Ladywinesalot]

I started off in happy and determined to keep the dc’s mental health well, which thankfully so far they are happy.

However after 5 weeks I am in a state.

I have a small business and it looks like it won’t survive the lockdown.

I no longer want to try new recipes, read books, speak to friends or learn new skills.

I’m still going for daily walks only because I’m trying to reverse the 10lbs I have put on since the beginning of March.

I’ve just lost my lust for life and have become incredibly passive with daily crying outbursts.

I don’t know how to feel better.

Everyone is probably feeling down about all things right now, but you just have to get a new mindset about all things, and carry on, as this is all you can do. No point in crying and giving up with everything. Despairing about all things, will make you feel worse in the long run.

Started out crying all the time and Raa rlly anxious.
Now feeling quite chilled, enjoying spending time with DH and DS, remote learning going well for DS. Managing to get online slots and cooking nice food. Sunny weekend forecast.
I think it will be when we have to go back to reality that I will struggle.

So 5 weeks will be up on 27th April.

It appears to a much looser 'lock-down' than seen in other countries - Italy/Spain examples in Europe and some countries South Korea and China much stricter again. Indeed, the first week or so was a joke looking at 'lock-down' pictures around Mother's Day for lots of the country.

Have some rough days but they are getting further apart. When the schools closed I felt as if someone I loved had died. I’m a teacher. I love my job.
DD’s birthday is done now and though it wasn’t what we planned I feel like a weight has been lifted. Also we are enjoying her new present.
I’ve been to work today which always puts me in a good mood. DD has patches of being annoying but she’s had a good few days and me and DH haven’t argued yet!

I do think at the start there was a novelty to the situation which has worn off now. But if we are going to be doing this for another 17 months we will have to knuckle down.

This week has been hard. The first 2 weeks kids were quite excited by home schooling and were getting stuck into their work, had a nice Easter, but this week all they've done is moan, whine, and argue. 2 have got asd and my dd likes to be awkward, so am constantly being pulled 3 ways. The novelty of being at home has worn off and I can't get them to do anything. I like having time to myself, I like my son company, so am struggling having everyone here 24/7. Dh is using our bedroom as his office during the day, and the dc have the rest of the house. Spent most of the morning crying. I'm just so glad its sunny as I think that's the only thing keeping me sane!

@ler83 I think your right, the novelty has worn off and the homeschooling is tough.
I am NOT a teacher, and there’s no way I can give my DC the quality of education they deserve.
I’ve been working through the worksheets with them but I only have the patience to do 2 hours max a day. Sometimes they wiz through it and sometimes they don’t have the patience to go through it at all.

I worry they are falling behind all their peers as I have 5 dc and DH is working out of the home.

@FourTeaFallOut I'm like you. Love a good book though. I hear of all these people baking, cooking, learning a new language, etc, and that has also been making me feel worse.

I've been up and down throughout but this week has been especially tough...but then today has been as good as it could be, so we will keep going - no choice but to, but no I'm not motivated in the slightest.

I am keeping on top of cooking, cleaning, washing, meal planning and shopping, home schooling and work but only because I have to!

Sending you a hug @Foreverlexicon

I just keep falling asleep. I have dc week and week about and the week I'm alone I find myself sleeping a lot. I'm not unhappy but my laziness is beginning to really bother me.

I was doing ok ,positive , upbeat, but Tuesday afternoon my best friend lost their father, Wednesday morning 3am I lost my aunt.Thursday I was furloughed:-( this week has been the hardest yet.

I'm feeling rubbish. Trying to wfh and work are expecting a lot, whilst also looking after my 2dc and supposedly home educating them. I'm sick of it, I can't do my job properly nor can I look after my kids properly, they end up watching tv all day while I work. I feel very stressed.

I've been at work and am completely motivated when there. Once home and at weekends I can't be bothered cleaning, reading, walking, cooking or really anything - I usually enjoy a good old binge watch but can't even be bothered with that.

Zero motivation. My mental health which was in a great place (for me) prior to this is back to being totally screwed. I'm paranoid, jumpy, can't sleep and I had my first food of the day at 6pm when I finally pinned down the weird feeling I was having to being hungry. Being at home is not my safe place, never has been and I'm not sure how much more I can take. If I didn't have kids I'd never get out of bed assuming I was still alive.

Week one I was fine. Researching everything, meal planning for 3 weeks with food that’d been bought for 1 week, linking up with local groups online, timetables for homeschooling, keeping everyone safe, cleaning obsessively. Motivated, trying to keep in control of everything and constantly planning (dh in shielded group)
Week 2 DH caught it and was very unwell very quickly. 3 out of the 4 dc got a mild case. Constantly monitoring obs, providing food, drinks, comfort and (for the kids) entertainment and tutoring when they were up to it. Terrified dh would die (ambulance recommended multiple times that week but consultant advised to try to stay home as multiple strains locally and dh immunosuppressed). Cried in secret, but busy and had purpose.
Weeks 3-4 homeschooling fell apart (Easter, none of them motivated to catch up). Kids unmotivated to do anything non screen based. DH still severely unwell. Developed secondary pneumonia. Scared he’d die. Unmotivated but kept going. No food deliveries available, couldn’t leave house as dh too unwell to be left. Scared.
Week 5. Dh recovering. Able to take daily exercise. Younger kids tantrumming a lot and resisting learning or activities. Oldest not wanting to work or do anything. Worried about dh business which is shut and struggling to access any government support. I can’t work despite being a key worker due to having to be home for dh. No income. No purpose. Feel I’m failing as 3 out of 4 kids mainly refusing home learning. Now immediate panic/ planning has passed I’ve become really low. Having to force myself to shower. Suicidal thoughts creeping in (history of depression, this is only my 4th episode in 22 years), obviously won’t act as I’m needed to keep everything together for everyone else. Really hope some restrictions are eased soon.

I'm up and down - the main stressor is balancing work with DS's schoolwork. DD is 11, motivated and manages hers herself, DS is 8, in process of being diagnosed with ADHD, and can't do much independently.

We're very fortunate to have a big house, albeit a small garden. In the early weeks I was wondering how I would cope with only having this house to look at for the foreseeable future, but it's been OK, and we haven't been put on almost-total lockdown like Spain and Italy and I don't think we are likely to be, as figures seem to be dropping without that being necessary.

Yesterday was pretty good as I took 'day off' (cleaning and doing work with son) but the day before was awful and I felt like I was going to pieces.

I'll start by saying I don't know if anyone wants any advice or just wants to vent.

If the latter feel free to skip my post!

The key to everything is understanding this...

Most people think that what's going on around them -> impacts how they feel -> which then impacts their thoughts -> that makes them behave a certain way (eat too much food, procrastinate, slob out, etc).

In actual fact this is a huge myth and psychological studies have shown that:

How we behave -> impacts our thoughts -> impacts how we feel about ourselves / our situation

SO

The best advice I can give is...decide how you want to feel (e.g. productive, content, organised, whatever...)

And then say to yourself... "If I was productive what would I be doing now?" and then do it.

You will find this gets you out of your funk.

You have to carry on with it for a day or so and then it will take hold and you'll see what I mean.

You can use this in any situation, at any time to get yourself out of any kind of rut you'd rather not be in.

On which note...if I was being productive I would be cleaning out the fridge before DH comes back with groceries (so off to do that with some good music on!)

Kids have gone feral and DH and I are alcoholics