WWYD - lockdown travel

[FairfaxAikman]

DDad is adamant he wants DS to have his birthday present on the day next week.

He's threatening to drive the 60 miles to ours. He's in the high risk category due to previous double pneumonia and diabetes and we live in a densely populated town.

He on the other hand is a tenant on a farm. He has fewer than 10 near neighbours.
I am also a key worker with credentials allowing me to travel for work within the community (though mainly working from home right now), so if I do get stopped I am less likely to be fined as I can just say I'm heading to a client.

I KNOW this isn't essential travel but weighing it up I think there is far less risk in me going to him than him coming here - and he's so bloody minded he WILL come here if I don't go to him.

What would you do?

60 miles for a birthday gift is ridiculous.

Why can’t he post it?

Can’t he post the present? If he’s just dropping it off and then driving off I can’t see the additional risk to his health to be honest.

I would not make the journey myself, and I would not be allowing him in my house. Sorry.

I would remind him that we are in lockdown and that much as you would love to see him you will refuse to open the door if he turns up on your doorstep. If he knows that you won't relent hopefully that stop him from making the journey.

Tell him that you will arrange a date for a get together as soon as we are allowed to.

You say no. The conditions of lockdown apply to everyone, he's not a special case.

Present is too big to be posted (outdoor toy) and I've told him all this re the lockdown.

I do suspect he's starved of company as he lives alone and wants to see DS. He's a retired infection control nurse and feels he can manage the risk appropriately to prevent transmission.

I don't WANT to travel but I want him coming here even less as I feel it's the greater of the two risks as it's more densely populated, and I'm the one actually "authorised" to be out and about and his home is within my work area (massive patch of eastern and central Scotland).

I could refuse to let him in but he's an arse and I'd be in for a lot of long-term aggro if I do.

I think you're right - you travel to him. Take your son and absolutely insist on distancing- he can sulk all he likes but it's ultimately his life you're trying to protect.

Can you take dc and drop him off for time with his dad for a while? You’re allowed to travel for drop off and pick ups.

It's my DDad, DS's DGDad