anyone else a work-worrier?

[zerocraic]

I worry about work all the time. Every single job I've had. The one I'm in at the moment is particularly difficult and I constantly feel like an imposter, though I've had it for years.

Am working through lockdown now and difficulty is exacerbated by childcare issues despite my H pulling his weight. It's just relentless.

Anyone else worry about work constantly? So many people are suffering so much right now and I hate that I'm spending so much mental energy worrying about work. After all, being let go is not the worst thing by far that could happen, and right now I don't think it will come to that.

Just interested to see if there's anyone else out there, and have you developed any techniques? Exercise helps.

This used to be me. I used to spend most of my time either working or worrying about work. I rarely worry now despite having more responsibility than ever before.

What's changed is that I don't have a micromanaging bully of a boss any more, I know that most cock ups can be sorted out and I have lovely supportive colleagues whom I thoroughly trust.

Me. Always have. I always feel I'm in the wrong and constantly under scrutiny.

I work in a sector where absolutely everything is recorded. It's not well-paid or particularly responsible but making a mistake is not an option. I'm constantly terrified.

I really don't know what's the matter with me and I have no suggestions as to how to cope better.

I think some people are just overly conscientious and others aren't.

I'm not generally a worrier but I AM a perfectionist and terribly judgemental (of myself and others).

I just can't seem to get a sensible perspective.

Well glad it's not just me!

I agree I think it's the way I'm wired. Very hard on myself, conscientious BUT also prone to procrastination and just don't process as quickly as I should a lot of the time.

I think i am in the wrong role and I do feel that if it was something i was genuinely interested in it wouldn't feel so stressful as I wouldn't have tp push myself so hard to care and keep up. maybe I'm just kidding myself and I'd be the same anywhere. I dunno.

Constantly terrified and unable to get a sensible perspective. Yep.

It feels good to say it and for someone to get it. I've tried to explain the feeling in the past to friends/family and they just don't get it.

Yes I am a worrier too. Not helped by the fact that I am having to work with a colleague who clearly despises me and is constantly looking for ways to trip me up. It makes me feel quite unwell and if it wasn't for the fact that the organisation is closing in a couple of month's time (planned well before coronavirus) and I will be getting a very generous redundancy payment, I would have handed in my notice ages ago. I wish I could just let it all go over my head but I don't seem to be able to stop thinking about it. I think it is the unfairness of it all that is bothering me. I am actually extremely good at my job and always professional, but this colleague is in a whole other league!

I am. I was bullied terribly in my old job and I can't shake it in this one.

I teach English as a second language in the evenings and I really get very anxious that I'm a terrible teacher. I'm particularly anxious with my foreign students because I worry that they literally don't understand a word I say and they are too polite/proud to say. It doesn't help that I have never really had any kind of peer appraisal, review, my observations always seem to be delayed or cancelled (was due my first one soon but now college is closed for CV) and because I teach out of hours I never get observed in my evenings class, only my daytime one (maths). I feel out of my depth, partly from having 4 years off, partly from never having worked in 'mainstream' (was in prison education before and its different there) and partly because i just feel like I'm rubbish at it.

I've just yesterday applied for an admin role in a school because I cannot shake this anxiety over teaching. I spend hours outside of my paid sessions editing, Changing, amending work and it's thoroughly exhausting.

I am sick with worry about my work and career prospects. Working ridiculously long hours, barely getting any sleep, ignoring housework and family and struggling with constant anxiety. I started on a new role in the middle of the lockdown and am working in a very hostile environment. Can't quit and can't cope

Carlywurly** my boss is a micromanaging bully too who has a tendency to fly off the handle at every little thing. It's been barely a month in this new role and I have already been publicly humiliated in several team calls. He does this to other colleagues too. I find myself working till 2 am and then tossing in bed till it's morning

I have felt like this when I'm in a hostile and bullying work environment . I've never felt like this when it's been a good team, realistic expectations, etc.
Reading responses above this seems to be something that comes with being conscientious and sensitive (me) + hostile / bullying bosses

I'm so sorry for anyone else who's feeling like this. It's no way to live.

I recognise a lot of what you all say and although I'm lucky in that my work environment is not particularly hostile (right now), I don't get much support (probably because at my stage I 'shouldn't' need any and so I'm often too embarrassed to ask for it until it's almost too late - so stupid).

thenewaveragebear I've done that kind of work many years ago and I totally recognise how stressful it must be and how much extra work and planning must go into it, way above and beyond what you officially work and get paid for. I too would jump at something 'safe' like a school admin job right now because I'm increasingly drawn to stability and dullness over unpredictability, 'dynamic', 'faced-past' etc.

@zerocraic thank you. I feel like my peers will look down on me as if I can't hack teaching (which I suppose is kind of true?) but believe it or not, I am actually a good teacher. It's the lack of comfort zone I suppose, it is constantly that you're never quite good enough or doing enough. I like the idea of being on top of my game for a while. Maybe if I have a good experience in this role (if I get an interview and offered the job of course) it might build me back up so I can teach again. There must be so many teachers who feel like this and people are scared to admit it because no one wants to be the one who needs support and isn't coping.

@thenewaveragebear1983

I totally understand a out being bullied in one job and not shake it in another. My last job was awful my manager totally gaslighted me and I have always considered myself to be someone who coukdn't be bullied! I was so wrong. He would do things like make an agreement with me before meetings about what I would bring up etc. then berate me in front of everyone for mentioning these things. That is only a snapshot of it but it was awful.

Now I am in a great team with an amazing manager but that stress is still there. It has been over a year I wonder if it will ever go away.

I do and I’m brilliant at my job (I even won Employee of the year 2019 😊).
If anything, that has made it harder as I have to ‘live up to it’.
I don’t dread Mondays but do get a little anxious about the week ahead.
I tend to worry about getting it all done and getting it all done correctly.
There is a fairly constant fear of making a mistake and people thinking badly of me for it.