10 month old won’t eat any solids. Please help!

[AdamantEve]

Posting in Chat for traffic as really need advice.

For background, my 10 month old has a developmental delay, nothing yet diagnosed but has severe delays with her motor skills. Probable learning disability.

We started weaning at 6 months very slowly. She can’t hold food so BLW hasn’t been possible so I’ve spoon fed purées, but 4 months down the line she will eat a maximum of maybe a tablespoon of purée per day.
She will not open her mouth for food and thrashes her head back and forth. I can only get the spoon into her mouth by (gentle) force, she won’t do it willingly and I know this is not a good method but she would eat even less if I didn’t do this.
She won’t drink from a cup/tumbler/straw etc - she’s breastfed and I’m exhausted keeping her fed as her at 10 months she obviously needs quite a lot.

I am so worried. She’s my third baby yet I feel like I know nothing. Health visitors have not been able to advise other than to keep trying. She has a hospital consultant, all appointments have been cancelled due to COVID-19 but could he help in any way? Is there anything that might help her eat? She’s not going to be able to survive on breast milk forever and it’s just become such a stressful situation for me.

Has anyone experienced this or have any advice? Will try all and any suggestions!

Maybe a sensory issue the texture on her tongue ? If you try and feed her finger food does she refuse that to x

I would post this in the SEN section.

Ask for a referral to a paediatric dietitian - this may be able to be done over the phone. It sounds like she really needs to be seen by SaLT though and that would need to be done in person.

Can you ring her consultant’s sectary and ask if it’s possible to get a telephone appointment?

I’m not sure about a sensory issue although I’ve wondered it, but once the food is in her mouth she will move it around and swallow it, she doesn’t spit it out, so I’m unsure.

I’ve posted in SEN before for other things but it’s very quiet there and I’m desperate for advice!

Dietician seems a good place to start. I’ll give the hospital a call on Monday and see what they think. My other two children ate fantastically well as babies, this is completely new territory for me.

There are groups on FB for autism and SEN! Loads of mums with children ASD/ADHD etc

I would join and ask on their if any of their diagnosed children were the same x

Hi OP, DD1 would not wean and ended up being tube fed for around 18 months.
A few years later she was diagnosed with autism and now eats albeit from a limited range of foods.
We had a referral to a dietician but also were referred to a speech and language therapist and eventually paid privately to see one that specialised in childhood feeding difficulties.
Our DD was extremely young at the time so at first the focus was getting her to sit at the table happily without any pressure to eat so blowing bubbles whilst in her high chair, drawing, painting, singing songs,
After this we moved onto something called food school playing with the foods and talking about its properties in age appropriate manner encouraging DD1 to hold it with the aim of getting it to her mouth. We also did family meals where everyone ate together as much as possible following a set routine for every meal with the food on the table in bowls.
There was also a book called just take a bite which also discusses food aversion.
Good luck OP. I found it a very stressful period of my life.

Please look for referral to a Speech and Language Therapist who specialises in eating/drinking/ swallowing disorders with children. They will be best placed to help you. @daisychainsandglitter has excellent advice in the mean time.

Would she eat something straight from a pouch? Its a different experience to a spoon and either she can suck it or you can gently squeeze it.

Your HV should have referred to SALT for a feeding/swallowing assessment in the first instance & also to a dietician for nutrition advice. That’s what I would do for clients in your situation on my caseload. My team isn’t doing any drop in clinics & 50% of my colleagues have been redeployed, but we are seeing families for urgent matters in bookable slots at the children’s centre (using PPE) & we can still complete referrals over the phone. Give your duty HV a call & request these referrals for your LO. Good luck, it must be very stressful & exhausting.

My DD (DC3) wouldn't eat either - either BLW or purees. I just gave up and she eventually ate a few peas before her 1st birthday. We had her checked out by a paed and a physio though.
She wouldn't take a dummy either, although she did eventually suck her thumb and wouldn't or crawl, or walk, she did bum shuffle at 12 months.

She's still quite wilful (annoying so) at 9yo. She's long sighted and mildly dyslexic. But sporty and amazingly kind and sociable and can spell significantly better than her mother.

Your DD sounds a lot like my DD at that age.

Mine only went to thicker purees at about 12-13 months old. She didn't drink from a sippee cup or put any kind of food in her mouth until 18 months or so. It took some time longer for her to actually bite off pieces of anything like bread, but now at 4, she is a pretty good eater.

Have you tried flavours that aren't too strong, such as yogurt? Purees can be rather overwhelming flavourwise if you are just used to tasting milk. Format DD, mango yogurt was the first thing that she would willingly eat.

Also, it is worth having a toy stuck into the highchair table for her to keep her distracted whilst you try to feed her. It's much easier feeding when they are concentrating on something rather than thrashing side to side.

Try to not breastfeed her day time... Simple as that

@3xmother. It is not as simple as that and what you are saying is dangerous. The OP says her little one has a motor delay. The child may not be able to take food other than breastfeed and if the OP took your advice she could end up with a dehydrated child.

Thank you for all the advice so far. It helps a lot to hear other people have experienced similar situations and understand how stressful it can be.

I will definitely be asking for the relevant referrals on Monday once I can get hold of people.
I’ve tried baby porridge this morning as it’s the blandest, smoothest thing I can think of, but after one spoonful her mouth was clamped shut again! I’m trying to be relaxed about it with her but as the weeks go by it’s getting more worrying.

I won’t be withholding breastfeeds unless I’m medically advised to. She’s had lots of investigations into her delay and all have come back ‘clear’ so it may be that she’s just behind other babies developmentally and will catch up, but she also may not be NT and in this case I don’t think she’d make the connection to eat instead of having milk.

Oh OP I remember the mouth clamping shut well. The more she shut her mouth the more anxious I became which she fed off and it became a vicious circle. My DD had such bad aversion due to mismanaged cows milk allergy that she would not even tolerate sitting at the table around your DD's age. If she will tolerate sitting at the table I would start eating together as a family as much as possible using family style serving. She will then be able to see you all at the table which will normalise things for her. The aim being that she will eventually model your behaviour. If you are all sat together eating normally as a family it also takes the pressure off her to eat. She can dip her hands into the bowl and help herself if she is able. If she can't then I would suggest putting a small amount of whatever you're eating on her tray. Doesn't matter if she doesn't eat it or makes a huge mess it's good for her to explore the food. A dietician referral will allow you to cut down the breast feeds in time. Hope this helps

Just back to say you're doing really well. I breastfed my kids too and remember the relief at weaning stage that I wasn't sole provider of nutrition anymore (both bottle refusers) so I know you must really be exhausted with your current situation and would just say your little one is lucky to have a mum who is really doing her best for her.

I had a cousin who totally refused solids until she was about 4yo.
She got tot he point she could (supervised) get the milk out of the fridge, fill the cup, pop it in the microwave for 20 seconds, put the lid on and then drink-and still didn't really eat solids.

I think my aunt used to put vitamins in her bedtime milk, but other than that the doctor said she was clearly healthy, she'd eat in her own time. And she did-just a long time!

DS2 didn’t start eating until he was 10.5 months (a few weeks ago!). He now eats about 3-4 tablespoons of purée (carrot, veg soup or yogurt mainly) per meal when he’s up for it which isn’t every meal. He still has far to go but he’s so much better than before when he literally consumed nothing but breastmilk. He showed some signs of promise when we started weaning at 6 months but various illnesses and allergies triggered a very sensitive gag reflex and I think it made him very mistrusting of food. Clamping his mouth shut, shaking his head no, crying... it has been a very stressful 5 months and I really feel for you. It was hard to work out his allergies as he would hardly eat anything but we slowly figured out that he’s allergic to wheat, eggs and bananas. Since avoiding those foods (me and him) he seems much more receptive to eating. It could be a coincidence but maybe he just needed to build some trust with innocuous food. He’s even started to put finger foods in his mouth on the odd occasion (he never put anything in his mouth despite following all the advice to encourage messy play, etc). One tactic to try- just put some purée
on her lips and see if she licks it. Then gradually see if she’ll open her mouth for more. He eventually did it for carrots- he doesn’t much like fruit or sweet things oddly enough. Keep trying very gently and don’t stress too much- let them watch you eat and join in at family meal times and they’ll get it eventually (I know that’s easy for me to say now!). Hopefully you’ll get referrals soon. We’re supposed to be seeing the dietician in a few weeks but I doubt that will happen in the current crisis. Good luck- you’re doing a great job!

Could you try spoonfuls of breast milk?

If she decides that's acceptable then after a week or so try just adding the tiniest bit of something else to it and work up gradually from there. If she won't take the breastmilk from the spoon then I think you could assume it's something to do with the method and the spoon that she doesn't like!

Don't forget, food under one is just for fun. It's important to keep trying but not important that it all falls into place now or that you go at a pace that causes either of you stress. It can take as long as it takes and that's OK.

Could you move to formula if or combination feeding if bfing is too much right now?

I exclusively pumped for my first child. Unfortunately that lasted 2 years as he refused solids until then. No rhyme or reason to it. That being said he thrived on BM and it still has practically everything your baby needs nutrition wise. DS had no SN and the only thing I can pin it to was sensory isues, he is 13 now and still.gags on certain foods.

Babies being slow to take to solids is.not all that unusual. Have a look on kellymom.com. they have great advice on it. The book my child won't eat was great too

Thank you @Mylittlepony374 I appreciated hearing that today.

So many good suggestions here. Absolutely going to try putting a small amount of food on her lips - I think I’ve got too hung up on trying to encourage her to eat what I consider a sensible amount, when actually I should just go back to absolute basics.

She did have a couple of weeks where she seemed to be improving with her eating but then needed antibiotics, which she hated the taste of and this actually seemed to send her downhill so maybe she needs to regain trust like PPs child and their allergies.

I’m not against the idea of trying formula but she won’t drink from any type of cup or bottle and believe me I have persevered with this, I’ve even offered things like juice that I’d never have dreamed of giving my other children at this age- she doesn’t want to know!

Such a relief to hear about other children who haven’t been keen on solids though, it’s very helpful.