How many men do you know that would agree to be be sperm donors?

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If you have a DP who is a man, can you ask them what they’d say if X friend asked them to be a sperm donor for them? (And how would you feel about it?)

Also, can you think of any men you would seriously ask if you needed a donor?

I’m a lesbian and feeling down about the cost of fertility treatment and donor sperm. I was reading old threads on it and ‘just ask a male friend’ gets said on nearly every one. It made me wonder what most males would actually say if asked.

My partner would say no because he would not be able to live knowing that he has a child in the world that he can't be a parent to.

I don't agree with the changes to sperm donation. I understand that children might want to know who their father is but in reality they aren't going to be a dad to them. The rejection could cause more heartache for the child. Sperm donation should be anonymous.

I have considered being a donor for many years, but It would bother me to have children that I'm not in contact with, I want to be part of making them succeed in life. for this reason I have been looking into Co-parenting, it would be amazing helping a lesbian couple have children and at the same time be a father, two mommies and a daddy what more can a child ask for =) but I'm not sure that is realistic. In fear of changing the subject of this thread, what are your thoughts on this matter?

Kind regards
Patrick

I don't think my DH would because he wouldn't want to have any children with another family.

I do have a single male friend who is struggling to come to terms with the fact that he might not have any children. I've not asked him, not sure I'd want to. He does have a physical characteristic which I think would prevent him from donating through an official clinic but there's no reason why he wouldn't father healthy children.

Guessing they wanted a known donor. Spanish law states that you can never find out details about the father, neither when choosing a donor nor for the child when they're 18. It's really sad to be honest to just get someone random and know nothing about them and for their kids to never have closure about their ancestry, where they've come from. It's great you're dreams came true but it's very sad for them and their child that they didn't get a known donor and the implications that will inevitably have.

I hope countries like Spain change their laws. I think it's totally unethical and I don't know how they'd prevent family dating each other. I guess they've got a registry of anonymous donors. Hopefully!

I like that there's a company in the US where donors can choose to be told off any live births and the clinic facilities a plan for future contact. Of course they sign documents to ensure they still agree the donor has no legal responsibility. I feel this should always be an option and not only that, donors should get to change their mind if they've said no initially. It's a big decision and people change their mind. They might suddenly wonder about the children they've helped produce and want to know regularly/annually how they're doing. The biggest thing people don't consider is for the countries that reveal IDs at 18, the father might not be alive anymore but he or the child might have wanted to meet. 18 years is too long.