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Original poster

1 year old behaviour a little bit concerning.

26 replies

Mybabysmylife · 11/04/2020 11:08

Hi everyone I have a 1 year old and he is displaying a little bit of concerning behaviour , I do have a 2 year old nearly 3 so I do know what behaviour is normal and what some kids can go through, but my son it’s like he’s just so so angry 247! I understand his sister does NOT help!l by aggravating him! But he’s a really really bad biter , I never went through the “ biting phase” with my eldest so it’s new to me .. he will come over looking so cute and loving then he will take a chunk out of your leg! Recently it’s getting quite worse to be honest , I was washing up earlier and he came in the kitchen picked my foot up and went to go bite my toe?! Like I know that there could be multiple side to this ( teething , frustration) he runs around in circles around my rug a lot , he likes to place his cars in line , he likes to play on his own a lot , he screams if he cannot get a toy of his sister he will NOT let go he will hold on to that toy till he gets it then he will bite her or rag her hair to the floor, however that being said he is very loving but he had a really angry side that scares me a little bit , I cannot turn my back for one second while cleaning toys etc because he will stare at his brother or sister ( step son) and bite them , step son was bitten on his cheek then 10 mins later hear my daughter scream he took the biggest chunk out of her back! Then I picked my daughter up and he ran upto me and bit my leg and it kills! If I give him food too eat alone , he will go crazy of i go near his food or try pass him it he will then throw it all over the floor and throw himself back and really bang his head! , I’m really not sure what I’m asking here but one thing is does this sound like autism to anyone? Or just general behaviour? Like I said I didn’t have this with my daughter because everyone’s different I won’t get 2 same children , just a parent with a little bit of concern for my baby. Thank you

OP posts:
McFarts · 11/04/2020 11:25

Yes some of this sounds like spectrummy traits, how is his communication? can he communicate his needs?

Original poster
Mybabysmylife · 11/04/2020 11:36

Not at all , I’m sorry I forgot to mention that, he doesn’t speak he says very little words , mama dada , mine , botbot (bottle) , dummy , here go( here you go) when I try learn him anything he doesn’t take interest , he looks at me but I can shout his name for ages before he looks and he can be stood right next to me , when he crys he does look up at me and shout mama x

OP posts:
MiniCooperLover · 11/04/2020 13:50

Have you ever tested his hearing?

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

1 year olds 2 year olds Families
Original poster
Mybabysmylife · 12/04/2020 09:57

Hi I had an appointment day before lockdown for his ears as his older brother ( my step child) had glue ear as a child and had bad probelms with speech growing up couldn’t really speak at all , he has speech therapy too so I wanted to get my son checked ASAP so I can help if he does have any problems with speech I’m upset now that he cannot get it done as he might be in pain with glue ear I’m not sure x

OP posts:
TwiggetyTwig · 12/04/2020 09:59

How close to being 2 is he? 13 months is very different from 23 months so it would be helpful to know where he falls.

It does sound worrying but it might just be frustration especially if there are concerns about his hearing, which would in turn impact his speech.

DaphneFanshaw · 12/04/2020 10:06

This sounds very much like my ds from around 18 months to around 2. 5 years.
He was a terrible biter, he bit everything and anyone.
It was a sensory thing for him, I think some children just like to bite Confused
He used to cry and have a tantrum over the smallest of things, once because the cat moved her tail. Confused
Your concerns could be markers for something else, but then again they could also be absolutely nothing.

DaphneFanshaw · 12/04/2020 10:08

Do you mean the biting has changed since lockdown ? Or just in general ...

Original poster
Mybabysmylife · 12/04/2020 10:13

@TwiggetyTwig hi Hun , he is nearly 19 months old. I have noticed to only way I can explain it is you know when you pay your hand over your mouth to make a sound? He wacks his mouth with both hands a lot , only just noticed that!

OP posts:
Original poster
Mybabysmylife · 12/04/2020 10:15

@DaphneFanshaw hi , he’s always done it since he turned 1 but recently it’s got worse , we was at play group months before lockdown and he
Ran over to a little girl and literally ragged her off the table and she really smacked her head I was so embarrassed everyone looked at me in discust.
When he did that I was just getting my other child off of the sand pit.

OP posts:
Original poster
Mybabysmylife · 12/04/2020 10:17

@DaphneFanshaw also , he starts nursery in January he’s 2 in October I’m petrified for him to go to nursery still biting , my son moans over everything but he will cry and scream throw himself on the floor and really bang his head if his sister has something he wants.

OP posts:
Original poster
Mybabysmylife · 12/04/2020 10:20

I know he’s only 19 months nearly but it is concerning as my heal visitor said he should no certain amount of words before he’s 20 month old etc, he pronounces “ door” as “ goor” but he said “ go go “ mama & daddy very clear , when on FaceTime to my parents he won’t look at the
Screen or when he does he doesn’t pay interest x

OP posts:
DaphneFanshaw · 12/04/2020 10:26

I do remember how hard it was to manage their behaviour when they are so spontaneous like that.
It is such hard work and really worrying.

DaphneFanshaw · 12/04/2020 10:28

It’s ok if a 19 months olds words aren’t clear, that’s normal at that age.

Witchend · 12/04/2020 10:33

It does sound in the range of normal. Some children are biters, the normal number of words at 18 months is 6-18 appropriate sounds.

There might be more going on, but what you've put here is hard work, but I've known children like this who are delightfully easy by school age.

ShouldWeChangeTheBulb · 12/04/2020 10:42

Get him a chewellry necklace. Google them there are plenty of options.
Other things that can help are electronic tooth brushes, ice pops, small Curley straws and crunchy food.

The sensory side is only one aspect because it seems like it more about emotional regulation but satisfying the sensory need should help. I’ve seen these strategies work for lots of people.

Barbararara · 12/04/2020 10:45

The biting sounds like sensory seeking and it can help to give him safe things to bite on - crunchy and chewy foods, or even things that have strong oral sensations (eg ice pop which is very cold). You can order chew toys that are safe. Or when mine were teething I would give them a sterile Muslim I had knotted and dipped in water.

One of the problems with the biting is that as well as satisfying sensory feedback he’s getting a great burst of behavioural reinforcement too as it’s pretty impossible not to yowl in pain. Ideally to break a behaviour pattern, you want to neutralise the consequence and give no response at all when it happens. Easier said than done at the best of times and impossible in these circumstances.

If you can get ahead of him and distract him it will help a bit. Try not to say things like “don’t bite” or “no biting” as that’s giving verbal attention to it. Keep other options on hand to offer if you see the jaws twitching!

He may enjoy games with a strong “I do this and you always react like that” basis. Peek a boo is an example. Or rhyme games where he drops between your knees on a certain word. Being very consistent (rather than varying or changing it up) may be an important factor.

(I’m using “may” a lot because you have to experiment a bit to figure out what works for any individual)

All of the above are suggestions to address different aspects of what might be driving the biting.
Could you call your older son’s speech therapist and ask what she thinks? Maybe she could do a Skype appointment which would be better than nothing.

BlankTimes · 12/04/2020 10:46

Can you get him a chewy and try to get him to bite that when he feels the need to?
Google sensory chew toys and try him with some of the larger ones e.g. www.cheapdisabilityaids.co.uk/ark-grabber-9802-p.asp

or a bangle, anything you think he'd be willing to substitute for the sensory feedback instead of people.

StillMedusa · 12/04/2020 11:16

If he's nearer 2 than 1, I would probably ask to be referred for assessment once life goes back to normal. He does have a few things that point to possible autism... but on the other hand he could be a toddler who is just being a trickier than average one! My friend's son was an absolute demon as a toddler (was banned from multiple toddler groups as he was absolutely savage!) and is now a very nice, capable graduate in a good job... and he doesn't bite anyone now!

Speech and hearing issues can have a huge impact on behaviour. My youngest had glue ear and autism.. he was passive and gentle but spent his days in a world of his own. Once the glue ear was sorted speech came gradually (he's still autistic obviously) but we were lucky in that he was able to get support very early.. early intervention, whatever the cause, really does help.

I don't think that you are wrong to have concerns... but don't panic either :) If he has glue ear/hearing issues they can be sorted, if he's on the autistic spectrum, the earlier he gets assessed the better. My son was non verbal at 4, placed in special school. He had fantastic support and is now a lovely young adult, who never stops talking, has a job, and while he will always need support he is one of the most fabulous and interesting humans out there :)

StillMedusa · 12/04/2020 11:20

On the biting.. the others have made good suggestions... minimal attention. Keep language short and clear. 'Ouch you hurt me don't bite' is a lot more confusing than 'biting stops.'.. the key word being the last one as that's what he will hear ... always have the intstuction as the last word :)
(I work with children who have asd... bitten a lot!)

SartBimpson · 12/04/2020 11:32

Or when mine were teething I would give them a sterile Muslim I had knotted and dipped in water

Out of curiosity, how does one sterilise a Muslim? Grin

Original poster
Mybabysmylife · 12/04/2020 13:14

Hi everyone thanks for all your brilliant ideas I will be sure to try them!! & I have thought about them necklaces but honestly he won’t keep anything on his body including clothes 😂!

OP posts:
Barbararara · 12/04/2020 19:02

@SartBimpson BlushGrin

BlankTimes · 13/04/2020 03:37

He's a bit young for a necklace, be careful of the cord around his neck, I was thinking more of the bigger ones like a key shape or a stick or wide bracelet that he could hold and chew.

Original poster
Mybabysmylife · 13/04/2020 07:31

@BlankTimes yes I have ordered him some sensory chewy toys , as we speak he just went to bite me then laughed uncontrollably

OP posts:
ShouldWeChangeTheBulb · 14/04/2020 14:51

The necklaces have the catches at the back that come undone very easily. So they are safe but I think like almost everything they would have supervised.