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Discussion are you scared of dying?

51 replies

FabbyChix · 10/04/2020 03:23

My sister is terrified she will get the virus as she said she knows she will die. She has mild underlying conditions and smokes. I said with that mindset you will.

I am not scared of dying. Never have been. I know that we are born and then we die. Ergo it’s not an option all life forms expire.

I don’t want to die though and I believe that having a mental state that is determined to not go yet means we have more chance of fighting an illness.

I’ve met people who were terrified yet I don’t get it. We are not aware of anything we won’t think we won’t feel. It’s called the cycle of life.

My dog just passed. I was sad the first day due to the suddeness, but he was really old, he had a good life, he didn’t suffer as it was sudden and he was never ill. I remember the memories he left me. I don’t feel sad.

Am I just weird.

OP posts:
loserssaywhat · 10/04/2020 09:34

I'm more afraid of the pain my children will feel. I lost my mum 3 years ago and the grief and pain is so overwhelming. The thought of my children experiencing that is such a horrible thought for me, I know it's natural process everyone experiences and I know some day they will have to go through it but that scares me because I won't be there to comfort them.

Purplewithred · 10/04/2020 09:35

I'm of an age to be expendable - I'm loved but nobody relies on me any more, grown up children can manage without me and both parents have died; husband would grieve but he would manage.

So like Woody Allen said 'I'm not afraid of death, I just don't want to be there when it happens'.

TeddyTeddy · 10/04/2020 09:41

I’m afraid of leaving my babies without a mother. I’m afraid of my parents losing me. I had a sibling that died and I used to wish my mum would just kill herself, her suffering was so enormous. I’m not afraid of the process of dying or being dead.

user1635896324685367 · 10/04/2020 09:41

I said with that mindset you will.

That's not how it works. And what a cruel thing to say to someone.

My mum was determined and convinced she was going to recover from cancer. She didn't. It killed her. In horrific fashion. It was traumatic for her and us.

You talk about the cycle of life but then nonsense about mindset and fighting changing the outcome. Such bollocks. Ignorant, offensive bollocks.

You're relaxed about dying because you've convinced yourself your mindset is special enough to protect you.

Which is fine, whatever helps you, but maybe don't go around being an insensitive dick to other people.

minmooch · 10/04/2020 09:46

No I'm not scared of dying. Lost my son aged 18 to brain cancer an watched him die an horrific death too early. At 53 in comparison I've had a very full life and if my time is up then I get to be with him.

I have another son to live for and a wonderful partner so want to live for them. But I'd die easily if my living son gets his chance to live a full life.

Walkingthedog46 · 10/04/2020 09:49

Nor can you disprove it

Walkingthedog46 · 10/04/2020 09:51

Sorry, that was in reply to Lovelslovely

LoveIsLovely · 10/04/2020 09:53

@walkingthedog

Yes because you can't prove a negative.

I could post a video saying "this is how to know you're going to heaven. a. you are wearing a white tshirt and b. you are doing a crossword" and say that you can't disprove it.

I'm not one of those rampant atheists but suggesting there is proof that you are going to heaven is very arrogant.

DonPablo · 10/04/2020 09:54

I'm sacred of leaving my children motherless.

Bagelsandbrie · 10/04/2020 09:56

Mindset means nothing when it comes to death. You either die or you don’t. You can’t will yourself not to die.

I’ve watched my Mum and my Gran die of cancer. It was horrific. There’s not many people who are lucky enough to have a peaceful death.

Dying is scary.

katew355 · 10/04/2020 09:58

I'm not scared of dying but I'm terrified of not seeing my daughters grow up or supporting them through their lives as they get older. I would also worry about the impact on my husband and elderly parents ☹️

Thighmageddon · 10/04/2020 10:00

The actual being dead part yes and no. I've been there before and was genuinely terrified when I was woken up in icu with a tube down my throat, prior to being put in a coma I was calm though even though I knew I was dying.

I am however really scared about being on a ventilator again though because the odds of coming off one with CV aren't brilliant looking at the overall statistics.

justanotherneighinparadise · 10/04/2020 10:01

I’m scared of my loved ones dying. Not myself.

FaFoutis · 10/04/2020 10:07

I'm not scared of death. I have come close before and felt a calm acceptance of it. I also think that when you have lost people you love you have one foot over there anyway.

DifficultPifcultLemonDifficult · 10/04/2020 10:10

You talk about the cycle of life but then nonsense about mindset and fighting changing the outcome. Such bollocks. Ignorant, offensive bollocks.

You're relaxed about dying because you've convinced yourself your mindset is special enough to protect you.

Which is fine, whatever helps you, but maybe don't go around being an insensitive dick to other people.

Exactly this.

You think the reason my children died is because they couldnt quite be arsed fighting it?

Ignorant and offensive bullshit Angry

Petiolaris · 10/04/2020 10:18

Nah. I virtually died while giving birth so I know what that level of pain feels like and how your brain copes. You basically go slightly insane so you don’t really know what’s happening. And afterwards it’s just black and you don’t know you’re dead. I’m not ready to leave DC but I’m not afraid to die - I won’t know.

Rebootingagain · 10/04/2020 10:22

As I think others have said I am not scared of death. It my happens to is all. My family would be devestated she and grieve but would survive same as billions have since the dawn of time.

I am scared of becoming so ill I can’t fend for myself and need constant medical supervision or start losing my faculties.

Hands up, I don’t have the mental strength for that and would worry about the impact on my loved ones

mumsie2020 · 10/04/2020 10:31

No unless it is a slow painful death to wish I opt out of enduring
Interesting subject.
Mental state does not help when you are
Living with certain conditions nor if medical advice is inaccurate, delayed.
For majority medication keeps them alive, not there mental state.. unless your a born again then keep believing.
The people you claim are terrified may have conditions already.

Viviennemary · 10/04/2020 10:50

In a way I am. I just want to know what's after death. I'm beginning think nothing. That's scarey. But being judged in front of some kind of heavenly jury is even woŕse.

justanotherneighinparadise · 10/04/2020 13:20

But death is inevitable eventually. It’s one of the few things we can be certain of. We’re all going to die. We just don’t know when.

Biscuitsdisappear · 10/04/2020 13:42

I don't believe that I'm scared of death its more the prelude that concerns me. Like many others I would prefer it to be quick and painless as opposed to a form of dementia for many years and being a burden to the family. A family friend has been given 12 months to live because of cancer. I would hope to remain strong and cope well in those circumstances.

Mascotte · 10/04/2020 13:46

I know what you mean. I’ve been struck in all this by how importantly people seem to regard their own lives.

I don’t want to die and need to be here for my dc but I’d rather live a great life and not worry too much about it.

HarrySnotter · 10/04/2020 14:21

Yes I am now. I had cancer last year and feared I would die then. I'm just getting my life back and I don't want to leave my children.

Lillylouise89 · 10/04/2020 14:26

@HarrySnotter really sorry to hear that and I’m so glad you are getting over that part of your life now. I hope you never have to go through that again, it’s just awful Flowers

HarrySnotter · 10/04/2020 16:39

Thank you @Lillylouise89, what a lovely post.