During lockdown you can temporarily change one thing about your partner. What do you choose?

[BillyN0Mates]

Foot dragging.

I adore my husband. He's brilliant. Everything about him is perfect and we've been happy for years. But man alive he does not pick up his feet when he walks.

There's a horrible swishing noise. Only since being in lockdown have I noticed this.

Anyone else?

Just me then

Snoring! If he would stop bloody snoring that would be great. And can it be permanent not temporary, please?

Oh god please the snoring. Please!

Or perhaps the way he can't make a cup of tea without depositing a small sprinkling of sugar over the worktops.

To be fair, lockdown isn't effecting us (as a couple I mean) too much as he works in the food industry so is still working full time (thank god ).

Oh we're working full time too (nhs) but I've never noticed it SO much.

His ridiculous elephant-trumpeting nose blowing. My god it's like he's trying to make a musical instrument out of his face. It's so LOUD. And unnecessarily forceful. Then this morning he comes to me looking ever so surprised exclaiming 'oh, my nose bleeding!'

Stopping the noisy eating...also 'chewing' fruit juice when he drinks. He is literally chewing on it arrghh!!!!!

Eating

Before this I had no idea how often he goes to the toilet. The man must poo at least 3 or 4 times a day It finally makes sense how he manages to eat insane amounts but remain as skinny as a twig!

Snorting and the bloody sniffing every 10 seconds.

I know he is quite snotty/phlegmy but think it's habit as well

Being very picky, but I wouldn't mind having a volume control. I'm not entirely sure he needs the phone for his teleconference calls, that are taking place up to 14 hours a day! Bless 'im. I can't talk.

He burps all the time, proper loud burps..I've been telling him for years that it's not normal and he needs to change his diet.

Now that we've been stuck in the house together since Thursday, as he's now WFH, I'm ready to murder him

Talking. He doesn't stop. Love him dearly and madly, but I have decided now I married him for his looks not his intellect! he is driving me insane talking about the news. His habit is to repeat what he has read, give opinion then move to the next story.....repeat Ad infinitum until my head hurts. If we could just discuss one thing in more depth and then fall silent I would be happy. But no, its like a running commentary of the BBC news site with subtitled explanations playing on a loop.

I'd make him a temporary DIY wizard rather than the man who, when we were assembling flat pack book cases, managed a ratio of one to my three (and I am no whizz myself!)

I just want him to be more fun

He suddenly hates the XBox.

The one thing I'd change would be that he doesn't have cancer or that the NHS hadn't stopped his treatment this week! Some people appear to be getting thrown to the wolves.

Fewer words, nothing else, just fewer words

Oh @Pelleas I’m thinking of enrolling mine into some sort of DIY class when this is all over.
He has all these great plans but absolutely no idea how to go about them. He was watching a YouTube video on how to operate a drill the other day

So trivial but the way he gulps down drinks. I'd never noticed before but he sits holding the mug/glass for 5-10 minutes then does 3 or 4 huge loud gulps and it's gone. Now I'm aware of it I can't ignore it!

These are brilliant!

My DH thinks there cleaning, ironing, washing and tidying fairies exist in our home!

Currently I'm not doing any of his or the kids washing. I'll give it 14 days before he realises 😂😂😂

His location...

Maybe twenty miles away would be good

Oh @Kazzyhoward I'm so sorry. Mine seems so churlish now.

Seems like most of us have a noise issue - and that we should be glad that's our only issue

Is turning him in to Aiden Turner acceptable? Please say yes

He is great at housework but the snoring drives me mad!