I'm a carer in a nursing home. And I'm struggling.

[TwatCat]

We don't even have any suspected cases of CV, but we are locked down. Each floor is locked down from all the others. And I'm struggling with it mentally.

I can't even begin to imagine how rough it is for those facing CV every single day. So I don't know why I'm feeling so fragile when I'm not in that position... so far...

How on Earth do I snap out of this?
My nerves are completely shot.
If I felt like this in "normal times" I think I'd be on the sick with anxiety etc. But I can't do that. I'm needed.

And it's only going to get worse. It's inevitable that someone is going to unintentionally take CV there at some point.

I have history of anxiety and depression but thought those days were far behind me.
To clarify, I don't feel depressed, just more completely overwhelmed.

I've no specific advice but i'm so sorry you feel so anxious. My mum's in a care home, they've been locked down for nearly 3 weeks. I'm so worried but I phone every day and the staff are wonderful. So thank you. Thank you to you and all your colleagues who do a difficult enough job at the best of times.

I feel the same OP.

Also a key worker and I’ve never known such collective worry and confusion as there is at work right now.

I don’t really have any advice other than you aren’t alone and to keep talking.

I cannot even imagine how the frontline NHS staff are coping with all this.

Do you have a manager you could talk to? a trusted colleague you could off load steam to? As a carer the only way I'm coping with this CV is by ranting to a fellow carer & having a 15min quiet time when I get home after each shift. My DS knows to leave me to it when I get in.

OP

Is your accommodation in the home?

Im also avoiding reading the news as much as possible

@AutumnRose1 no I do my 12 hour shifts and then I come home.

Also a carer it is incredibly emotionally draining at the moment. We have to keep our wards alive, whilst being the biggest risk to them. Plus generally having to work longer hours.

It is OK to feel fragile and scared and anxious. Not nice but OK and a perfectly normal response.

Make sure you sleep enough and eat sensibly. Big hugs

@maryboleyn I've tried to avoid the news, deleted my news app, but it's hard to avoid it when everyone at work is talking about it constantly. My mum works for the NHS and she is a bag of nerves over it too. It always comes up in conversation how bad it is at her hospital and she only works for a small hospital.

I am dreading each day that I need to go in to work. I'm back in on the morning and I've already got a banging headache just thinking about it.

I'm worried that I'm not going to be able to put a happy face on tomorrow. When I'm just not feeling in the mood to look happy right now. And the residents miss their families so much.

I'm almost jealous of the people that are staying at home.

No advice but just want to thank you for your hard work. I know that sounds trite but your work means a lot to me personally. Take care

I feel the same. We’ve got 5 suspected cases and one that’s been taken to hospital to be tested. We have no proper ppe and have been told we have to still come to work with cold symptoms or a chesty cough. We have staff leaving and staff off sick for non Coronavirus issues and they’re not replacing them. We’re having to do the jobs of two or three people at once.

I’ve had two residents ask me today if they will be okay and can we keep them safe. I lied and said yes but I don’t think we can. It broke my heart.

Get where you are coming from with the jealousy, why aren't the I can only leave home in a gimp suit mob being actively encouraged to go work the land or anything else vaguely useful.

Take it a day at a time. If your care home is locked down you are minimising the risks to both yourselves and the residents. If you wash your hands before and after seeing each resident then you are also doing what you can to reduce risks.

When you get home take off your clothes and wash them and yourself before doing anything else.

I avoid the media too much but maybe watch one bulletin a day. Do you gave ppe?

I can manage my anxiety better at work when busy and using appropriate ppe. So I keep my home time full of things that are for me or the family and not covid related. Doesn't stop the sunday night nerves kicking in each week. Being hospital based I have probably had a bit longer to get used to it than just the last couple of weeks that most people have. I still get spikes of fear but am doing ok at pushing them away considering...

Take time for yourself, you will get through it because you care for your residents xx

It sounds like you need a bloody good cry, to let all that fear, anxiety and grief out.
My son is a carer
He’s going round people’s houses
He needs the money

I’ve got a total ban on the news
It’s the only way to keep fear out

What can you do ? I don’t know . My mum has carers x 3 a day as she has vascular dementia and cannot take meds safely or be relied on to eat properly and is “ glitching “ like crazy . Begging me this week at one point to take her “home” . I can’t get her in a carehome at the moment because of staffing levels . Statistically she will be reassured with a team of people round her 24 hrs a day. Leave her at home in distress potentially exposed to the virus through home carers or potentially expose her to the virus in a carehome . I’ve no idea what to do . I have had a horrible week . I feel if if the shits hits the fan it can be managed at a carehome with dignity .

So what I’m saying is you are doing a fantastic job . This people would be worse off without your care . X

Thank you so much for what you are doing. You are helping to keep people safe. I can understand you feeling anxious - it is such a stressful time - but as someone with family dependent on carers, thank you.

@MichaelBoobins that must be absolutely awful! I really feel for you. All any of us want to do is keep them all safe. But who knows what's around the corner. Sending you loads of love. Keep up the hard work! ❤️

@Sewrainbow yes we have our basic ppe. Gloves and aprons. Soap and water and alcogel. We always wear the ppe and wash our hands and arms 100 times a day. As soon as I get home my uniform, jacket, underwear (everything) goes on a hot wash and I get straight into the shower before I do anything. I wear the same underwear and uniform every day as I just take it out of the tumble drier each morning and put it straight back on.

@Dowser I've cried on and off the past 4 days.

@geekchicz my grandad is in the same nursing home where I work. I've contemplated taking him home and looking after him from home but I know I can't do it with DH working from home and two kids. He's end stage dementia and needs specialist nursing care round the clock. And I know he's being looked after really well by all my colleagues. But it doesn't stop me from wanting him home.

Thank you for keeping going, this will pass eventually and you'll be able to feel proud you did your bit, for now it's one day at a time x

I know love . I have two primary school aged children . I couldn’t look after mum properly before this all hit us before- barely plugging the gaps as my mum is bad but not truly bad enough - bad being in the cusp of god knows what according to the mental health act . I’ve been abandoned by secondary care this week / they couldn’t give me any advice . What we want and what we need to do are completely at odds with each other . Much love x

Much love to you too @geekchicz it's a horrible time to have someone who needs care. None of us know what to do for the best.

And thank you to everyone saying thank you. It really is appreciated.

And to those of you with family in a nursing home, thank you for trusting us with your loved ones, we genuinely care and have a love for them and we will do all that we can to get them through this as safely as we can. ❤️❤️❤️🌈🌈🌈

Thank you for all you do. You are doing amazing. This is as stressful as it gets . It's normal to feel anxious and overwhelmed at a time like this, especially in your job.
Try to mind yourself on your days off. Do some meditation, get some fresh air and most of all, be kind to yourself .