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Original poster

Getting married

12 replies

Pinkbutterfly79 · 27/03/2020 23:01

Me and Dp have been engaged for 2 years - together for 12- but haven’t actually made any wedding plans as yet.
We have been talking today and he thinks we should get married ASAP (in the local registry office) just the two of us and then plan a blessing when the world gets back to normal.
I think he is worried about something happening to one of us and us not having the protection of being married.
I have no idea if this is even possible and I don’t really know how I feel about it to be honest. I do want to marry him and can see his point but I don’t know if I want to get married without my parents, sister and best friends.
Is this a crazy idea? A sensible idea? Could we do it and not tell anyone (so our parents won’t be upset about not being there)

OP posts:
PatriciaHolm · 27/03/2020 23:07

Are you in the UK? If so, unfortunately weddings are not being permitted right now at all. You could plan for a few months time but at the moment they are not allowed and it's unclear when they will be.

Brookeinabook · 27/03/2020 23:23

Can you instead speak to a lawyer (probably working from home?) and get advice on the legal protections you need for now.

Original poster
Pinkbutterfly79 · 27/03/2020 23:23

Yes we are in the UK.
I didn’t think they were but he said you could still marry but without guests.
Thank you, there is my answer then Smile

OP posts:

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Weddings
Original poster
Pinkbutterfly79 · 27/03/2020 23:26

We have got our wills up to date and they state our intention to marry and everything left to each other.
Would this be ok? The house is in his name (I wasn’t working when we bought it because ds was just a baby so he had to get the mortgage in his name only) he seems to think this would be a problem of anything happened to him?

OP posts:
Brookeinabook · 27/03/2020 23:37

Can't the house be in both your names anyway? I'm not sure. Speak to a lawyer because they can tell you in a phone call I should think

Brookeinabook · 27/03/2020 23:38

(Or is there an MN legal corner even?)

AnotherEmma · 27/03/2020 23:42

How much equity is in the house; would it take his total estate above the threshold for inheritance tax?

Does you both have life insurance with the other as a beneficiary?

I do think his plan is very sensible but as PP said it might not be possible atm, they did say that marriages are not allowed (not sure if that was big weddings though and small registry office marriages are still permitted??)

Preseli · 27/03/2020 23:57

My partner and I were meant to be getting married early May, with just us, and 2 witnesses (minimum for a legal wedding) and we are unable to do so if the rules that are currently in place are still in effect (highly likely)

You also need to think about the fact that you can't just go and get married, you have to give notice etc, and those appointments are just not available at this time as they are not essential.

I would instead recommend getting a will (which I would recommend for anyone that has any assets like a house!) and / or speaking to a lawyer.

Even if there is a way you can get around the lockdown rules, your wedding day should go the way you want it to and if you get some paperwork in order then there is no need for it.... If you had plans to marry in the next few months I would understand bringing it forward but it does seem like a bit of an overreaction.

The only reason a marriage would be necessary in the case of a death would be if you have no will or a bad relationship with either of your families who may contest the will... both of which would be easier to resolve at the moment than trying to get a wedding set up at this time!

Original poster
Pinkbutterfly79 · 28/03/2020 13:21

There aren’t any family issues so no worries there
Everything in our wills is left to each other.
If anything was to happen to him would I still be able to live here with the children or would I be made to sell the house and pay inheritance tax?
It’s funny how this only seems important when the world is being turned upside down!

OP posts:
Preseli · 28/03/2020 15:36

That's good Smile

It would really depend on how much the house is worth as the threshold is £325,000. If it is below that then no inheritance tax would have to be paid. Also depends on how much equity you have in the property and if there is a mortgage outstanding.

If anything happens though you will have a lawyer dealing with the will and estate that will guide you through your options.

I do hope you get through this without having to find out first hand but as you say everything has been turned upside down and it's always best to have a plan in place if the worst scenario occurs! Smile

VegetableMunge · 28/03/2020 15:45

It’s funny how this only seems important when the world is being turned upside down!

Well this is the thing about marital status! Day to day, when things are going well, most of the time it really doesn't make a lot of difference. There are exceptions, like the automatic PR issue, but the large majority of the time you can get by without it feeling particularly important. It's when the relationship ends through either death or separation, or when that feels more likely than it used to, that it has most importance.

So yeah it's a completely reasonable thing to do. Just not sure whether it'll be doable. If not then I'd agree you should book an appointment remotely to discuss your affairs and whether any changes are needed with a solicitor. Lots still working remotely.

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