Could anyone please help those of us with ASD?

[BooFuckingHoo2]

Hi all,

Sorry for the post but I have ASD (live alone) and this lockdown has absolutely wrecked my normal brain function. I have been up all night literally shaking because I just can’t cope with how different things now are.

I realise this must sound incredibly selfish given that people are actually dying but I just don’t know what to do and I’m scared I’m going to become so unwell I’m going to end up in hospital which obviously won’t help anyone

All my community appointments have been cancelled and I can’t get an appointment with my GP. I’m scared I won’t see anyone for weeks and I physically won’t be able to go to the supermarket on my own. I wouldn’t want to even ask a friend to visit because I don’t want to put them in a position where they have to break the rules.

If anyone has any advice that would be amazing

I don’t have any advice right now but just wanted to say, you will cope very well. Things are very scary when we don’t understand or have no experience of them, then when we get used to it it’s not so scary anymore. This will soon feel quite normal to you.

Why are you not able to get to a supermarket? If you need help with food/supplies then people will be allowed to help you.

DD has written herself a timetable for the day, and intends to do so every day until this is over.
It includes getting showered and dressed, exercise, cooking, learning specific new skills (eg Duolingo) time online with friends, crafting, Netflix, cleaning a particular room...
She’s terrified, but chopping up the day into manageable pieces helps her maintain control.

Thank you

I just can’t cope with supermarkets at the moment (not good with them at the best of times) because of the total chaos, amount of people and complete disorder. I went last week and had to walk out and leave my shopping because I was about to meltdown - it makes me feel so selfish and then I beat myself up about it more

Do you wear headphones?

If you go on FB and search for local community support groups you will probably find one with people in your area volunteering to help. I would avoid individual people you don't know due to scammers but there are quite a few small shops, cafes and so on who are now changing to take away and delivery services. These people could safely deliver you some essentials until the shops settle down and online delivery services are available.

This will pass it won't be like this forever, call a friend ask them to pick you up shopping ,do you have food atm ? Can you do a list of what you need forthis week and go from there, you are not alone or selfish.

That’s really difficult. I suffer with anxiety so I understand.

But I also know that it’s never as scary as my mind tells me it is - if I push through, sensibly, without pushing myself too much at once - then ‘the thing’ (whatever it is that I find frightening) is not ever nearly as bad as my idea of the thing.

I agree with the above poster - make yourself an outline of a routine for your time at home. You will feel better if you’re not aimlessly wondering what to do all the time.

Call your friends - it’s not the same as seeing them in person, but it’s still a perfectly good way of keeping in touch.

Have you got any food in the house right now? Enough for a couple of days, even?

OP please don't worry, my DP had a meltdown last night. He has ASD and this is taking its toll.

The behaviour in supermarkets has been crazy, no wonder you were overwhelmed- don't be embarrassed or beat yourself up, you did nothing wrong. Is there a small local shop you could visit for essentials. DP found our local corner shop tolerable, but sainsbury's a nightmare.

If you have any friends you are certainly not breaking any rules asking them to help you, with an ASD diagnosis you are classed as vulnerable. You are doing the right thing asking for help.

Have a look on FaceBook to see if there any local groups, (community, church or charity) who are advertising help. If phone calls are hard then maybe you could FB message or WhatsApp then.

I’m autistic. I have a routine. Timetable each day, food, television, housework, reading, exercise. It’s helping.

Online deliveries are your friend. And for now Facebook groups for shopping. Good luck!

I don't have anxiety, but I am autistic. My standard response to being overwhelmed with something happening or something I need to get on with is to sit down and do nothing. I have been sitting down for over a week now! I don't know what to do, I want to get on with some tasks in the house but I can't seem to be able to motivate. I'm thinking of going back to basics and making a visual timetable to get me through. So I have some focus. My whole routine has been thrown out the window and I am struggling. I also have D.C. - 2 of them autistic, so this is a huge challenge. I need to sort myself before I can sort them. Fortunately DH is here for them right now. I feel like a zombie! So yeah, I'm going to try a visual timetable.

Thank you so much everyone

I have enough food in to physically keep me alive, but I tend to repeatedly eat the same things which obviously with the current shortages/buying limits is quite difficult

Do you feel better if your food is on repeat is this one of your main anxieties? Do you prefer a certain amount of your food.in the house,I think it is ok to get your usual shop as long as it isn't loads

Yes unfortunately I find certain brands/items reassuring but I’m being super conscious not to stockpile and deprive other people.

Have you had a look at amazon? You might be able to order some of your comfort items from there and then maybe you could branch out and try just a few new things from the supermarkets when you do go.

My standard response to being overwhelmed with something happening or something I need to get on with is to sit down and do nothing.

I relate to this so much! I stay in bed all day and don’t get up but then I feel disgusting and everything is disordered so it gets worse! It’s a vicious circle!

Could anyone recommend some activities I could get stuck into to try and keep myself busy?

The Open University does lots of free courses, I’m sure you could find something new to learn!

I watch YouTube videos by various channels that I like, on subjects that interest me, like travel, food, homesteads and allotments, make up and fashion, sewing and embroidery, and also a few that are just really good for mindfulness - beautiful to watch and I find them really soothing. I’ll link a few for you as soon as I can.

Creative writing exercises can be fun.

Learn a new language.

One little job or chore in the house per day that you have been meaning to do for ages (if you’re that kind of person) - we’re slowly doing a deep clean of our flat, just one little space at a time.

A long bath (if you like them) with a pampering session afterwards.

Painting your nails, if you like to do that.

Do you like to read? If so there’s always another book to explore...

We (two DC with ASD and me likely as well) have made a routine based on doing simple, familiar, straightforward things but at a slower pace than usual. It might be different for you, but for us it helps to have 1 or 2 hour blocks to disappear in screens or books (soothing for all of us), alternated with something more physical or challenging. One my DC has been keen to teach me a (blistering complicated) card game forever, so we've doing that during our block of 'learning something new'. It is a good combination of new and familiar. I am working a fair bit, also something that keeps me grounded and engaged at the same time. Lots of sensory soothing stuff: quiet time, duvets everywhere, baths for me, teddies for the kids.

Also, it helped me (but might creat more anxiety for others) to research the coronavirus and government measures thoroughly. I felt most stressed last week just before I decided to take us into isolation but didn't know enough to feel confident in my own decisions. So I stayed away from panic-ridden social media etc but read up on the science of the disease and now feel much more calm knowing we're safely inside and what the actual risks for certain activities are.

I feel for you having to do this on your own though. Are you okay with keeping in touch with people over the internet? Or at least watching them from a distance through social media? I left a fair few random comments on people's FB that might have seem a bit out of the blue for them but made me feel that I was not alone, even if I didn't really want to talk to them. I've also joined FB pages that offer an online choir, yoga etc, and join them without having to let people know I'm there.

If I were alone I would probably like doing puzzles, playing repetitive games on my phone and doing an online course of some sort.

If you don’t already play it, Hay Day is a lovely, fun game with lots to do. I play it to relax. I love looking after my animals, growing crops, producing goods and decorating my farm and making it just right. 😊

A lot of supermarkets are actually very quiet atm. Just dont go at the weekend. Go at night or early in the morning (just check that it isnt their elderly/NHS hour first). I went to Iceland yesterday and there were maybe 10 other ppl in the whole time I was there. Wear some gloves :)

Also, ppl are allowed out to the shop so you could ask a friend or two to get you some things when they go. And just leave it on your doorstep.

NASA website for identifying new stars, nebulae etc. is cool. You participate in identifying.